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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Missed Marks (348)

Thursday
May032012

Draw Something

You guys, I reeeeally want to play Draw Something, but I'm afraid I'll be terrible at it. AND THEN WHAT? I ask you.

So, while I haven't played it yet myself, I did watch my friend Missy do a couple of rounds on her phone. I even helped her guess the answer on one, and then felt all proud and smart and stuff. Which got me to thinking: what if there was a version of Draw Something where you just guessed the answers, and didn't have to actually draw *ANY* thing?

PREEEE-SENTING: WRECK SOMETHING!!

The rules are simple. Just guess what the drawing is. I'll even provide you with the letters for the answer - and no sneaky extra letters, either. The only caveat is that I didn't actually *know* the answer on a couple of them, so in those cases I just made something up. But don't worry; I'm sure you'll still get it.

Ok, let's start with a really easy one, for practice:

DBA PIPHIE EPOUTE

As you can see, using the visual clue it's child's play to unscramble the letters and get "BAD HIPPIE TOUPEE."

 

YOUR TURN!

DEDRAW LULENC

Bonus hint: At least there's no glitter.

 

 

MITE OT ESE HET LOGORUSTI

Bonus hint: Don't cross the streams.

Bonus hint hint: Uh-oh! You're in trouble!

 

 

ORF MOWH ETH ELBL LOLTS

Bonus hint: Clarence would be proud.

 


SFIH KITSCS

Bonus hint: These help the people of Tartarus really hit the sauce.

Bonus hint hint: What? They look like SFIH on KITSCS, ok? I CAN'T HELP WHAT I SEE.

 

 

DIPSREBEW

Bonus hint: If John gets this on his face he screams like a little girl.

 

(NOTE FROM JOHN: NOT TRUE. It's more like a manly banshee.)

(NOTE FROM JEN: I find this substitution...acceptable.)

 

Thanks to Margaret, Becky S., Danielle M., Natalie R., Katie H., & Nikki F. for helping us draw all the wrong conclusions.

Tuesday
Apr242012

BALLS

Attn parents: Sports-related double entendres ahead! Proceed with caution!

 

The other morning (and by "morning" I mean "afternoon") John woke up with a pain in half his tiddlywinks. (And by "tiddlywinks" I mean..."tiddlywinks.") He's fine now, so not to worry; those are all the gory details you're going to get.

Well, unless you count the fact that today's post is all about wrecked balls. Call it a subconscious thing. Or my way of getting way too much mileage out of some good-natured ribbing.

 

So...

 

Balls.

 

They come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. But no matter what, balls have at least one thing in common: they're generally supposed to be more round than lumpy:

Now that's just nutty.

 

One exception, of course, is the football, which is shaped more like a loaf of bread with harp strings:

I guess some balls are just more likely to touchdown than others.

 

I'm told this is either a soccer ball or a steamrolled panda:

Ain't that a kick to the head?

 

And don't get me STARTED on this "basketball:"

Slam dunk? More like a Slam FLUNK. 

[rimshot!]

 

Sometimes it helps to put your balls with other related pieces of equipment. That way people will know how to handle them.

All that's missing is third base. 

 

And of course no discussion of balls is complete without...um...hang on. Is this what I think it is?

It is!

Bakers, you should be ashamed of yourselves.

 

That flaming basketball is totally not to scale!


(So tell me, players: Do you experience a burning sensation when you dribble?)

 

Thanks to Natalie B., Dolores T., Rachel J., Erica B.,  Heather F.,  & Lauren P.,  who will no doubt agree that if John's going to sit and play Xbox for 27 hours straight, he should probably get some looser boxers.