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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Mithspellings (351)

Thursday
Aug262010

Great Wrecks In Store

Loyal Henchpersons, it has come to my attention that some of you are now concerned about ordering a cake. You feel there's no hope; that you're doomed to receiving a Wreck no matter what precautions you take. And for some strange reason, I feel a little responsible for this.

Well, good news, cake consumers: I'm here to restore your confidence! That's right: we're going to take a little field trip over to the local grocer's bakery. C'mon.

[pulling into parking lot] Aw, look! That must be the decorator's car! See, now that is an artist who takes his craft seriously.

Don't worry; I'm sure "CACE" is just an acronym.

Or a pun.

Or...something.

Look, the point is, this is a decorator who's not afraid to take "risks" for his art! And if you don't believe me, just look where he parked:

See?

Well, let's head into the store now, shall we?

[heading down main aisle]

Oooh, check it out! There's a sale on...er...wait. What does that say?

Ok, I can see you're getting a little concerned here. And, yes, three of the five words in the product name are misspelled. But, hey, they got "air" and "Febreze" right and those are tough! Besides, I'm sure the bakery employees are much more literate.

In fact, let's get over there; we have a cake to order!

Well, it's nice to know their ingredients may or may not be certifiable. Like I always say, a little mystery adds spice to life! Right? [elbowing ribs] Right?

[arriving at bakery counter] Ah, here we are! Now, let's get that cake ordered!


Hey, where are you going?

Get back over here!

C'mon, I'm sure the cake will be FINE. Don't be such a worry-wart!

Tell you what: I'll tell the nice employee here what we want, and you go grab some candles, ok? Meet you back here in five.

[five minutes later]

Oh, good, you found the candles! So...why don't you look happy?

Ah. Well...on the bright side, I doubt our decorator had anything to do with this! Heheheh - no?

Look, just to prove to you that everything is going to be alright, I got a copy of the order form the baker submitted for us. I'm sure once you look it over, all your concerns will be gone.

Um. We did want to be "Drawed a picture of a Thrown," right?

No?

Well, drat. I guess now we just hope for the best; they said it'd be done in just a few minutes...



A-ha! See? What'd I tell you? Nothing to worry about at ALL.

Oh, quit complaining: a double inscription means double the fun!

And centering is boring.

And teal is kind of like "royal blue." In as much as it's blue. Ish.

And it only looks a little like a shower chair toilet thingy.

And...hey, where are you going? We still have to add the candles! Come back!


Well, Wreckies, I hope this little excursion has helped allay your fears of professional cake ordering. Now go forth, and order cakes!

And maybe bring your cameras. You know, just in case.

Tesha W., Cathy W., Amanda D., Noelle R., Maggie C., Morgan W., & Penske, I guess that order was such a royal pain that it blue right past the wreckerators and had them throne for a loop. So I guess we'll call it a "drawed."

Wednesday
Aug182010

Cakes of the Month

Are you tired of remembering your coworkers' names while celebrating their birthdays? Do you just want cake in the break room without all the fuss of that "personal touch?"

Then welcome to the Cakes of the Month, where (for an annual fee) we provide your workplace with generic monthly treats suitable for all your office birthdays!

 

And just look how gorgeous!

 

We do not charge for inscriptions*. Period.

 

(*Extra fee does apply for exclamation points, proper names, and cursive capital 'J's and 'Q's, since we're still figuring out how to make those.)

 

 

No birthdays this month? Nooo problem. We'll fill a few month names* and no one will be the wiser!:

(*Extra fee may apply)

 

 

Should you do something special for your spiritual coworkers?

 

Is a Gemini lonely when its Taurus Moon is in retrograde?!?


Daily Horoscope says: "Today, you will be visited by unnecessary sprinkles and apostrophes."
(3D glasses not included.)

 

 

But what about the taste, you ask?

 

Why, our cakes are so delicious, you may just foam at the mouth!


One bite of our infectious confections, and you'll go crazy for more!

 

 


And for the manager who can't be bothered to remember what month it is, we have the perfect* solution!

 

 

(*A "Birlhday" for "Everbody" is considered an extra celebration and therefore is not included in the CotMC annual fee.)

 

 

Complimentary memberships* go out to Adrienne B., Paula C., Arwen L., Gloria D., and Brittany A.

* S+H not included.