Supper Bow Tie Optional

What's that? The Super Bowl is this weekend? WOOHOOO!!

That means it's time for the annual reappearance of...

 The Super Bowel!

GO, SUPER BOWEL! GO, GO, GO!

 

 Too much. A little too much.

In their continuing quest to use gingerbread cookie cutters for everything BUT gingerbread men, bakers have finally scored their most discomfiting design yet:

And just like that, every football phrase I know got dirty. o.0

Hey, ever wonder what wrecks will look like in the future?

Yeah. Me, neither.

My Roman numerals are a little rusty, but I'm pretty sure the W stands for 1.2 Gigawatts:

(That joke is funnier when you realize there IS no W in Roman numerals. Which means I had a good chortle when I looked it up just now.)

Seems to me bakers are better off leaving out the numbers all together. That way, they only have to focus on finding new mispellings for "bowl":

 

My new favorite. Does everyone have their supper bows on?

I know that professional sports have a way of dividing people against each other, so can we all just agree now that this mud pit with its two shrubberies is the REAL winner?

NI!

After all:

And actually, if you could just send the food my way in a doggie bag, that'd be awesome. (I have some Downton Abbey to catch up on.)

Thanks to Dan,  Cammy A., Carrie A., Grace, Elizabeth L., Jim K., Anna M., Sarah S., & Josie H. for remembering to include extra BBQ sauce with the pigs-in-a-blanket. 

"Morning People" Need Not Apply

Shhhhh! NOT SO LOUD with the breathing and the clicking with the mouse and whatnot, ok? Geez.

Now, if you'll kindly take your extra-strength cups of coffee and scroll quietly this way, I've prepared a little photo montage that I think perfectly captures our collective New Year's morning experience:

 

Also, I'm sure some of your evenings last night included a bunch of these:

Although whether those are exploding champagne bottles, firecrackers, or phalluses is anyone's guess.

Still, don't worry; we're going to get through this together if you remember one important safety tip: if and when you start to see something like this floating in your peripheral vision:

...be sure to tell someone.

Not me, though; I'm going to be too busy lying on the couch over here with a pillow on my face.

(Confession: I didn't actually drink anything last night. It's just nine o'clock in the morning, and I'm a blogger. Ug. Wake me when it's noon, ok?)

Oh, and this baker would like to wish someone named Mary a happy new year:

So I guess the rest of us are out of luck.

Thanks to Elizabeth, Caitlin C., Tara C., Kate H., Alison C., & Sarah J., for ringing in the new year the best way possible: metaphorically.