Search

My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Mithspellings (285)

Tuesday
May202014

Because SIX SEVEN ATE! Haha! (Wait. Am I doing this right?)

Today is a red letter day, fellow wreckies!

 

Well, really more of a red number day.

Maybe I should start over.

 

See, today I've been writing Cake Wrecks for SIX WHOLE YEARS.

Six years!

 

That's 2,190 days, about 2,118 posts, and at least 638 poop puns.

Not to mention all the cupcake cake (patooie!) spit-takes that I've frankly stopped keeping track of.

 

So today's post is brought to you by the magical number six!

[chanting] Six! Six! Six!

Oops.
(Hey baker, you misspelled "Damian.")

 

On second thought, forget the number. Let's just focus on ME.
So...
Happy anniersy to me!!

Haha!

And here's to thousands and thousands more poopy chocolate swirls, crazy misunderstandings, wrecked weddings, overly-literal executions, blatant demonstrations of inferior quality control...

[loud sobbing]

Ahem.

 

But most of all here's to YOU, my dear wreckies, and the increasingly disturbing fan wrecks you keep sending in:

[Good luck censoring THIS, John! Ha!]

Don't ever change, you sick sickos, you. MWAH.

 

Thanks to Emily D., Jamie L., Mike & Johanna, Brooke M., Debbie N., Tanisha M., & Brianna E., who spotted that last one at a friend's baby shower, but no one explained to her that it was a CW tribute, so she was really, REALLY confused, which makes it all SO MUCH BETTER. (Carrot Jockey nipple censors FTW!)

Note from john (thoJ): I'm like a Photoshop master. Click here for the uncensored version.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.


Friday
May092014

Word To Your Mathar

This Sunday is Mother's Day, and bakers are here to help us tell Mom exactly how we feel:

Only without all that namby-pamby decorative stuff.

"Flowers are a sign of weakness, kid. Now, shake your mother's hand and let's have some cake."

 

You've heard of "a rose among the thorns?" How about "a rose among the intestines?"

Wow. Thank goodness they used all that frosting to glue cupcakes down in a random worm shape instead of making a repulsive "normal" cake, eh? EH? AhahahahaaaSOB.

 

Bakers know not all of us have mothers, though. Apparently some of us have Mathers:

 

And still others, Mathars:

 

But no matter what you call her, bakers know that special lady in your life really, really likes ugly purses:

 

No, I mean REALLY ugly:

 Because ovaries.

 

So let's hear it for Mo!

Mo is #1 because Mo understands the importance of finishing what you start... unless it's time for your lunch break.

 

Thanks to Michelle A., Anony M., Heather, Rachel H., Amanda B., & Kira G. for knowing mum's the word.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.