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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Oopsie (42)

Tuesday
Jan142014

The Final Countdown

Look, bakers, I'll be the firth to admit I'm not so great with numbers...

 

...but something here just doesn't add up:

 

Major props for helping "Keydunce" celebrate such a special milestone, though.

The kind of milestone, in fact, that most of us will spend the next few seconds trying to pronounce.
(I'm going with "three-und." Or maybe "Thirnd.")

 

Hey, is it just me, or have you noticed families having LOTS of kids these days?

Not to mention getting super lazy naming them all.

(Johnny Five's sister? We can only hope.)

 

Ok, now you're just making stuff up.

 

Maybe if you skip the number superscript all together...

Nope.

 

Well, bakers, I guess you're just going to have to spell them out. That way there's no chance of any of these piddly little technical errors, you know?

I don't... how could... WHY... Oh, never mind.

Happy Liberation Day, Kanaan.

 

Thanks to Kajal, Kailey S., Anony M., Moira B., Beth M., Tyffani C., Alison U., & Crystal T. for putting two and two together... and getting all sixes and sevens. (That one's for you British mates. Smoochies!)

*****

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Friday
Aug162013

No One Will EVER KNOW

To quote absolutely no one, piping mistakes happen. A slip of the wrist, a miscommunication, a minor earthquake - for whatever reason, sometimes things go wrong with your order, and that's when many bakers get to practice their most undervalued skill set: sighing a lot and calling their managers.

Still, the good news is that professional bakers are, in fact, professionals, meaning these ninja-like icing sleuths can leap into action, repairing even the most heinous of cake crimes with a single, uh...

Never mind.

 

Granted, some of them can be a little more subtle than others:

(I did say "a little.")

Then again, erasing names on birthday cakes is the most common correction bakers have to make, so it goes without saying that they are really, really bad at it.

 

There are plenty of techniques besides the scrape & smear up there, though. Other options include:

- Airbrushed Blobs

 

- Icing Blobs

 

- Icing Blobs Of Unusual Size

 

- The Sprinkle Dump (Oy!)

 

And for a real clean sweep:

- Stick A Smaller Cake Board On Top Of It And Just Start Over

There's nothing quite like watching a master at work.

 

Scoff if you like, but these bakers do deserve our occasional sympathy. I mean, sometimes your piping bag runs out of icing, and then what? THEN WHAT??

 

Oh. I guess that.

 

And, sure, wiping off a bunch of red icing may have accidentally made Mr. Cookie here look like a blood-soaked serial killer, but let's focus on the important part:

NEW WINDOW DISPLAY!

 

So at the end of the day you can rest easy, bakers, knowing all your efforts have not been in vain.

And that's no mistake.

(Well, ok, it is, but you know what I mean.)

 

Thanks to Kori R., James D., Stephanie J., Saara, Renee R., Kathie, Sydnia Y., Laura W., Charisse J., & Dustin A. for the reminder that turnabout is foreplay fare play.