Search

My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Oopsie (56)

Thursday
Aug162018

No One Will EVER KNOW

To quote absolutely no one, piping mistakes happen. A slip of the wrist, a miscommunication, a minor earthquake - for whatever reason, sometimes things go wrong with your order, and that's when many bakers get to practice their most undervalued skill set: sighing a lot and calling their managers.

Still, the good news is that professional bakers are, in fact, professionals, meaning these ninja-like icing sleuths can leap into action, repairing even the most heinous of cake crimes with a single, uh...

Never mind.

 

Granted, some of them can be a little more subtle than others:

(I did say "a little.")

Then again, erasing names on birthday cakes is the most common correction bakers have to make, so it goes without saying that they are really, really bad at it.

 

There are plenty of techniques besides the scrape & smear up there, though. Other options include:

- Airbrushed Blobs

 

- Icing Blobs

 

- Icing Blobs Of Unusual Size

 

- The Sprinkle Dump (Oy!)

 

And for a real clean sweep:

- Stick A Smaller Cake Board On Top Of It And Just Start Over

There's nothing quite like watching a master at work.

 

Scoff if you like, but these bakers do deserve our occasional sympathy. I mean, sometimes your piping bag runs out of icing, and then what? THEN WHAT??

 

Oh. I guess that.

 

And, sure, wiping off a bunch of red icing may have accidentally made Mr. Cookie here look like a blood-soaked serial killer, but let's focus on the important part:

NEW WINDOW DISPLAY!

 

So at the end of the day you can rest easy, bakers, knowing all your efforts have not been in vain.

And that's no mistake.

(Well, ok, it is, but you know what I mean.)

 

Thanks to Kori R., James D., Stephanie J., Saara, Renee R., Kathie, Sydnia Y., Laura W., Charisse J., & Dustin A. for the reminder that turnabout is foreplay fare play.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot:

Wednesday
Mar142018

Easy As Pi

Happy Pi Day, guys!

Yep, 3/14 is the day a bunch of nutty math nerds decided to celebrate the mathematical constant that is the ratio of any Euclidean circle's circumference to its diameter...

...mostly by doing stuff like this:

Mmmm. Pi pie.

And yes, the baker DID put the 5 on backwards so it looks like a 2. I'm sure s/he was just testing you, though.

What's that? You didn't IMMEDIATELY catch that?! Well, that just means you need to learn pi out to seven decimals, then!

And what better way to do so than with Cake Wrecks visual aids?

LET'S GO!!

 

Three...

Point...

(Thank you, uh thankyouverramuch.)

One...

(I know, I know; you thought that was number two, but no.)

[rim shot!]

Four...

(Yes, I know it's upside down. The question is, why didn't the baker?)

One...

[singing] "I'M lookin' at the NUMBER innn the mirra'! OW! I'M askin' it to MAKE a cha-hange!! HOOO YA! Sha-MOW! Uh-HUH!"

Ahem.

Where were we?

Let's see... 3.141...what's next?

Oh, right:

Five nine two...

No lie, you guys: I'm looking through your submissions for a number five, and I find this random cake someone found in a display case with the number 592 on it, and I check my pi cheat sheet, and the next three digits of pi actually ARE 592!! I mean, WHAT ARE THE ODDS? AND WHY AM I SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS?!

Don't answer that.

We all know why.


Ok, so. 3.141592...

Six!

(Yes, really. It's a six.)

So there you have it: you've learned pi to seven places with Cake Wrecks! Great job! Pocket protectors for everyone!


And for those of you whose day just won't be complete until you see some pie wrecks, a gift from John:

You're welcome.

 

Thanks to wreckporters Rachel W., Nasina G., Grahm, Maggie M., Gin D., Caroline C., Rebecca M., and Mike - and also to John for the most painful pun in the history of crockery. I knew I married that boy for a reason.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot: