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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Questionable Taste (129)

Thursday
Nov292012

What Could Go Wrong?

I've often thought the "gender-reveal cake" trend was fraught with peril, and today's wreck is a good example of why. 

In case you haven't heard of it, the reveal cake has either pink or blue icing hidden inside, depending on the baby's sex - but the kicker is, the parents bring that info sealed from their doctor to the bakery, so the cake is how they find out if they're having a boy or a girl. 

So...you're trusting a baker to correctly communicate your baby's sex? 

Gee, WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

 

 [whistling innocently]

Happily Kevin S. and his wife already knew they were having a boy, but for fun they decided to send a reveal cake to his parents to break the news. As is typical, they asked for it to be white on the outside and decorated with pink and blue polka dots, plus maybe a few question marks. Then they asked for blue icing inside the cake.

When the special order arrived at Kevin's parents' house, this is what they found:

o.0

And to think: someone looked at this and thought, "Yeah, that's what the customer wanted."

(John says you should read that cake out loud. So, go on. DO EET!)

 

Still, as baby cake trends go, it could always - ALWAYS - be worse:

...and frequently is. *sigh*

 

Thanks to Kevin and Stephanie F. for that revealing slice of humor.

Wednesday
Nov282012

Improper Grooming 

Grooms-to-be, we need to talk.

Your future wife has probably been planning her dream wedding since puberty. So your job is to pick a groom's cake that shows you gave this one small decision more than 5 minutes' thought with a Magic 8 Ball while you waited for Halo to load.

So. A few tips:

 

- Don't give your infantile friends the chance to make "Big Melon" jokes: 

Because you know they will, and probably to your future mother-in-law.

(You might avoid this situation by printing out a simple reference guide for your baker:

 

- While we're at it, don't give your friends any openings for "limp hose" jokes, either.

 They'll probably save those for their toasts. 

 

- There is no place for entrails at a wedding. Ever.

Trust me, the bride will hate your guts. 

 

- Do not, under any circumstances, insinuate your bride is a female dog.

Not cool, man. Not cool.

 

- Also avoid any implication that you're having a shotgun wedding...

(...and that multiple shots were required)

 

...or that you were a sitting duck.

(That is a cake, right? The masterful camouflage is making it so hard to see!)

 

- And finally, never, EVER, give your friends and family a reason to think your marriage might go down the crapper:

 

 

Thanks to Todd Kim, Anon M., Katie L., Allison, Anna C., Anon., and Solli S. for joining me in a rousing rendition of "Here Comes the Snide."