My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Say What? (60)


Say What, Again?

Sometimes people often send me their cakes with no back story, which usually isn't a big deal, but other times...




I like to think this is the same James:


And all together, now:

"Nana nana nana nana nana... da heck?"


Now here's a reader who knows how to properly stage a photo:

Never have I been so grateful for a pair of quotation marks.


Deep Thoughts
From The Bakery:

I guess it must be a birthday cake? Maybe?

"Gee, thanks, Mom."
"And don't forget to show your friends the new sweater vest I got you!"


I think "Danngeous" is supposed to be "dangerous."

Sooo, I'm guessing they never saw these bon-bons, then.


"And thank YOU for putting them out again."


This is one of those times I wish I was a baker:

I mean, the urge to put a plastic roach in this thing must have been OVERWHELMING.


And finally:

That says "Happy Holidays Mile High Ferret Club."


[drops mic]


Thanks to Jessica L., James S., Antoine J., Anony M., Erica M., Lynne M., Landon D., Karl, & Deirdre M. for letting our imaginations run wild... presumably alongside a bunch of pregnant ferrets.


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Insulting Inscriptions 101

Some handy tips when crafting the perfect cake zinger:

1) Don't misspell it.

There's nothing like borrowing song lyrics for a backhanded compliment, but misspell the thing (and omit all the necessary apostrophes) and you come across more crude than clever.


2) Be specific.


Ok, so Charity smells - but what does she smell like? Hmm? Could be roses, or cotton candy. (Mmm, cotton candy...) This is the time to release your inner muse: tell us what putrescent stench Charity is emitting, and really explore your literary space, ok?


3) Keep it simple.


While you're exploring that space, though, don't get so carried away that no one can tell what you're trying to say. Instead of an oddly phrased "Youth Forgot", why not go with something more straightforward? You know, like this:

See, the lack of exclamation marks or capital letters here really brings home juuust the right amount of indifference. Even the off-centered leaning seems to say, "Hey, I got you a cake, alright? Don't go pushing your geezer luck by expecting quality."


And lastly,

4) A little name-calling can go a long way.

Again, creativity is king here. Just watch your penmanship; that "Fink" could almost be mistaken for "Tink".


Thanks to this next one I think I've found my new favorite pet name for John:



Kathryn R., Laura I., Sonya L., Mercedes R., Beth, & Kelli A., obviously your fathers smelled of elderberries.


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