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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Say What? (53)

Thursday
Nov292012

What Could Go Wrong?

I've often thought the "gender-reveal cake" trend was fraught with peril, and today's wreck is a good example of why. 

In case you haven't heard of it, the reveal cake has either pink or blue icing hidden inside, depending on the baby's sex - but the kicker is, the parents bring that info sealed from their doctor to the bakery, so the cake is how they find out if they're having a boy or a girl. 

So...you're trusting a baker to correctly communicate your baby's sex? 

Gee, WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

 

 [whistling innocently]

Happily Kevin S. and his wife already knew they were having a boy, but for fun they decided to send a reveal cake to his parents to break the news. As is typical, they asked for it to be white on the outside and decorated with pink and blue polka dots, plus maybe a few question marks. Then they asked for blue icing inside the cake.

When the special order arrived at Kevin's parents' house, this is what they found:

o.0

And to think: someone looked at this and thought, "Yeah, that's what the customer wanted."

(John says you should read that cake out loud. So, go on. DO EET!)

 

Still, as baby cake trends go, it could always - ALWAYS - be worse:

...and frequently is. *sigh*

 

Thanks to Kevin and Stephanie F. for that revealing slice of humor.

Wednesday
Nov072012

WE'RE DOOMED

[NOTE: In an effort to be more efficient/lazy, I may have written this post last week. I'm pretty sure you won't be able to tell, though, so forget I even mentioned it.]

 

My dear wreckies, the end is officially nigh. In fact, I think it's safe to say that the end has never been MORE nigh than it is at this very moment. It is a moment FULL OF END NIGH-NESS.

With President [insert winner's name here] in office, our country will soon be nothing but a moldering pile of Taco Bell wrappers and Snookie CDs. The seas will boil over. The sun will burn. The stars will do crazy loop deloops, but, like, in a really bad way.

Frogs will rise up from ponds everywhere and hippity-hop all over our lawns.

 

And then they'll eat our daisies.

OUR DAISIES!!

 

All birthdays will be cancelled, and replaced with "buttdays."

 

Our new national flag will be a giant flip-flop...STOMPING ON AN AMERICAN HEART.

 

And perhaps most terrifying of all: a legion of lop-sided zombie Barbie cakes will slide menacingly onward, the better to consume our very souls:

Yes, my friends, with the inevitable campaign of doom and destruction heralded by President [insert winner's name here], our only hope can now be in hunkering down with enormous cases of peanut butter while we await the apocalyptic....uh...hang on...

Did someone seriously make a WEDDING CAKE out of WHOOPIE PIES??

Best. Idea. EVER.

 

 Ok, never mind that other stuff. We're good.

 

Thanks to  Susan F., Debbie A., Anony M., Alexandra, & Gregory H. for putting things back in their proper perspective. Peace, love, and whoopie pies, baby. Awww yeeeaah.