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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Spaced Out (36)

Friday
Mar152013

I'm Irish, But Don't You Dare Kiss Me

 It's nice to see bakeries really getting into the St. Patrick's Day spirit this week:

 

 By which I mean they've clearly been drinking.

This is one week I'd actually kind of love to work in these bakeries. I wouldn't be drinking, though; I'd just be egging on all the drunk bakers.

I'd be all, "Hey, guys, you know what we need? JEWISH LEPRECHAUNS."

And they'd be all, "OMG JEN YOU ARE SO SMART AND PRETTY BUT MOSTLY SMART."

 

Sha-POW!

 

Then I'd hold relay races where all the drunk bakers have to ice a cake with their elbows and pipe on the side swags with their teeth:

Ker-PLOOIE!

 

Next I'd get them all to do that thing where someone stands behind you and and you pretend their arms are your arms and play icing Pictionary: 

Bam! Zap! Ni!

 

And finally, I'd just be overly enthusiastic about everything they made, no matter HOW terrible, kind of like your favorite aunt acted when you were four:

[shrieking] THIS IS THE BEST SHAMROCK CAKE I HAVE EVER SEEN. Who wants more beer?

 

[gasp] Did you use the airbrush? WAY TO GO, YOU! And did you cut out that paper pot of gold yourself? You DID?! Well, now, who's a big boy? WHO IS IT?!

 

  I have never wanted to kiss a red UFO more.

 

Yep, I'm telling you, guys, that would be a HOOT. 

 

Now, y'all have fun this weekend, and be safe, and remember:

 Easter wrecks are next.

 

Thanks to Tamara H., Dan B., Lindsay B., Timothy E., Dara M., Courtney L., Jessica D., & Amanda M., for the sobering selections. ;)

Friday
Sep142012

The Best Return For Your Money

Spacing: The FINAL frontier.

 
These are the travesties of the bakers-who-don't-plan-ahead-well.


Plus the ones who like to center-justify their text so each line only has four letters each, because, yeah, THAT makes sense.

(Great. Now I really want there to be a band named the Cong Rats.)


Or how about just three letters each?

 Que?

 

I know how those long words can sneak up on you, bakers, but the important thing is to make sure everything is legible and spelled correctly:

Oooh, so close.

 

Less close.

 

You're kidding, right?

 

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE??

 Ahem.

Then there are the bakers who get their spacing right, but throw in a dash anyway:

Dash it all!

And, uh, this person:

Oooh, if only there'd been more space for the baker to work with!

 

 And finally, there are the bakers who are just batpoop insane:

Forget the writing - I want to know what that drippy brown spot is.

Or...do I?

o.0


Thanks to Krissy K., 

Christine D., 

Justine J., 

 

Chris & Jessica, 

Deborah B., Carl J., Marina C., Angela W., Bronwyn G., & Angie W. for really exploring the
bakery space.