Search

My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Spaced Out (36)

Friday
Sep102010

Strategic Strategery

September is International Strategic Thinking Month! Time to celebrate the joys of planning, forethought, thinking ahead, planning, and, you know...um...

Hey, look! Cake!

Dashes make everything better -

...as I'm sure Queen J agrees.


Don't you hate it when there's that one really looong word in your inscription?

[shaking fist] Darn you, "happybirth!" Why do you have to be such a long, difficult-to-break-up word?!?

Of course when you do split up long words, knowing where to make the break is key:


In this case, placing "grounn" and "dhog" on separate lines just makes good, old fashioned sense. You know, kind of like cocaine in Coca-Cola. Or leeches.

'Course, if you play your cards right, then you won't have to break up any words:

[squinting seriously] "Now that's strategery."

Of course, when you have an oddly shaped cake strategic thinking is a must:


See how the baker left off the edge dots where the letters hang over? [tapping temple] Smarts, man. Smarts.

Nadine, Justine J., Krista M., Kevin H., P.K., Erin P., I wrote a short speech to thank you all for your contributions. [ahem hem hem]

"

Thursday
Aug262010

Great Wrecks In Store

Loyal Henchpersons, it has come to my attention that some of you are now concerned about ordering a cake. You feel there's no hope; that you're doomed to receiving a Wreck no matter what precautions you take. And for some strange reason, I feel a little responsible for this.

Well, good news, cake consumers: I'm here to restore your confidence! That's right: we're going to take a little field trip over to the local grocer's bakery. C'mon.

[pulling into parking lot] Aw, look! That must be the decorator's car! See, now that is an artist who takes his craft seriously.

Don't worry; I'm sure "CACE" is just an acronym.

Or a pun.

Or...something.

Look, the point is, this is a decorator who's not afraid to take "risks" for his art! And if you don't believe me, just look where he parked:

See?

Well, let's head into the store now, shall we?

[heading down main aisle]

Oooh, check it out! There's a sale on...er...wait. What does that say?

Ok, I can see you're getting a little concerned here. And, yes, three of the five words in the product name are misspelled. But, hey, they got "air" and "Febreze" right and those are tough! Besides, I'm sure the bakery employees are much more literate.

In fact, let's get over there; we have a cake to order!

Well, it's nice to know their ingredients may or may not be certifiable. Like I always say, a little mystery adds spice to life! Right? [elbowing ribs] Right?

[arriving at bakery counter] Ah, here we are! Now, let's get that cake ordered!


Hey, where are you going?

Get back over here!

C'mon, I'm sure the cake will be FINE. Don't be such a worry-wart!

Tell you what: I'll tell the nice employee here what we want, and you go grab some candles, ok? Meet you back here in five.

[five minutes later]

Oh, good, you found the candles! So...why don't you look happy?

Ah. Well...on the bright side, I doubt our decorator had anything to do with this! Heheheh - no?

Look, just to prove to you that everything is going to be alright, I got a copy of the order form the baker submitted for us. I'm sure once you look it over, all your concerns will be gone.

Um. We did want to be "Drawed a picture of a Thrown," right?

No?

Well, drat. I guess now we just hope for the best; they said it'd be done in just a few minutes...



A-ha! See? What'd I tell you? Nothing to worry about at ALL.

Oh, quit complaining: a double inscription means double the fun!

And centering is boring.

And teal is kind of like "royal blue." In as much as it's blue. Ish.

And it only looks a little like a shower chair toilet thingy.

And...hey, where are you going? We still have to add the candles! Come back!


Well, Wreckies, I hope this little excursion has helped allay your fears of professional cake ordering. Now go forth, and order cakes!

And maybe bring your cameras. You know, just in case.

Tesha W., Cathy W., Amanda D., Noelle R., Maggie C., Morgan W., & Penske, I guess that order was such a royal pain that it blue right past the wreckerators and had them throne for a loop. So I guess we'll call it a "drawed."