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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Wedding Wrecks (57)


Faulty Towers

Marisa F. writes,

"My sister-in-law had a beach destination wedding in Mexico, and decided that she loved this sand castle cake:"

"Upon speaking with the baker, she explained that she understood that the baker may not be able to recreate the cake exactly, but would be happy with something similar. The baker insisted that she could make a cake as equally beautiful. They agreed that the cake would be 3 tiers, with the sand castle on the top. 


"On the wedding day, she instead got 3 separate tiers, each topped with its own version of a flesh colored sand castle:

That door and window are what really sell it.


"Luckily, the Bride and guests have a great sense of humor, so the Penis Cake was the hit of the reception."

To be fair, they could also be mushrooms. Really happy, attentive mushrooms. 

[insert "fun guy" joke here]

"My sister-in-law was disappointed, of course, but even she had to laugh."

Wow, talk about a good-natured bride! I'm totally sending this to the next newly-wed who e-mails me complaining that her cake's shade of cerulean was a little off. PERSPECTIVE.

Oh, and here's the real kicker: 

"After the reception, they discovered that the 'castles' were merely frosting covered Styrofoam, so this cake topper now has a place of honor in the loving couple's home."

 Bwahahaa! Now that's my kind of wedding memento!


Thanks to Marisa for letting me use an epic John Cleese pun for the title, even if I couldn't think of any more Fawlty Towers jokes to work into the post. You must excuse me; I'm from Barcelona. (Ok, so that's ONE.)


Wedding Is Believing

You all know we have a "professional cakes only" policy here at CW, but when it comes to wedding cakes that can be a tough call. See, apparently most of you wreckporters feel a little awkward accosting the bride and demanding to know if her baker actually considers himself a professional. (Cowards.)

So, today, I'll let you guys decide. These really are all wedding cakes served at actual weddings, and in many cases the photographers claim to believe the baker was paid. For your sanity, though, you may want to go on believing someone's Aunt Sally made them as a last-minute "favor."

Needs more rose petals.


Is that...meat? And more importantly: if your cake looks like a giant meat slab, wouldn't you think about maybe slapping some frosting over that sucker?


Aw, now that's a shame; if only they had a few more bunches of fake flowers you wouldn't have to see the cake and tinfoil at ALL.


Does anyone else get the feeling this should be rotating and spraying water out of the swan's mouths?


And speaking of water...

Mmm. Wet tissue paper.


Proof that there aren't enough gaussian blurs and hazy vignettes in the world to make a wreck look like a Sweet.




Thanks to Heather H., Michele T., Connie P., AG, Samantha B., Allli B., Jessica H., Zoe H., & Skye C., for providing nightmare fuel for future brides everywhere.


PS. Believe it or not, I actually DID wean out a few that were even worse than these, because, for example, the baker put the wedding cake on a rusty pie plate:

So I'm REALLY hoping that means it's homemade.

Still, the important thing to remember is that THIS IS A WEDDING CAKE.

And hey, put it on a regular cake board and I've totally seen worse.