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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Wedding Wrecks (57)

Tuesday
May172016

All Hands On Wreck: Pirate Ship Wedding Cake A Sight For Sore "Ayes"

Today's bride had an interesting request for her wedding: she wanted a pirate ship for the cake.

The baker was totally onboard, though, [snerk] and even sent over this inspiration picture so the bride would know what to expect on her Big Day.

You're seeing it now, right? All white, roses... I'll be darned if this isn't pretty elegant!

 

Ahh, but trim the sails and lash the rigging, ye scurvy dawgs, 'cuz here comes the actual wedding cake our anonymous bride got instead:

OH SHIP

Now that's a cake for private tears.

(Privateers? Eh? EH?)

You know, I could almost forgive the general fold-out-sofa-bed-on-blue-shag-carpet vibe going on here, but I cannot - CANNOT - get past those hysterical little "sails." Seriously. The longer you look at them, the funnier it gets. Like a hippo using a moist towelette square to preserve her modesty.

And that mental image you're having right now? Still not as funny as those sails.

 

Thanks to my anonymous bride minion, who I'm pretty sure is why the rum is gone. But hey, who could blame her?

*****

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Thursday
Apr282016

Doilies and Squiggles and Spray Paint, Oh My!

It's time again for everyone's favorite:  WEDDING WRECKS!

(Well, everyone but the bride.)

(And possibly the baker who may or may not have been assaulted by the aforementioned bride)

 

What the bride wanted:

 What the bride got:

 

Hey, Jen has a dummy cake in her office this exact shade of Wilton Spray-On Blue!

Proof:

Don't ask.

(Or do; Jen's rather proud of it.)

 Moving on...

 

 What the bride wanted:

 What the bride got:

I like to imagine a bakery order sheet somewhere with the words, "Pink, brown, and squiggly" all checked off.

 

(Btw, "Pink, brown, & squiggly" is the name of my topless Vegas act.)

 

 What the bride wanted:

 What the bride got:

To be fair, it's probably just the lighting.  Really, really bad lighting.  Like hospital lighting.  Or maybe morgue lighting. Heck, I bet every body looks like this in a morgue.

 [Later that day:

 "John, why do we have 300 emails from morticians?!"]

 

 What the bride wanted:

 What the bride got:

  When only the best will do: Doilies.

 

Thanks to P. C., Jenni S., Brett R., Esther G., and Jen for keeping the baby cake locked in the closet and away from the knives...

*****

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