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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Wedding Wrecks (38)

Wednesday
Jul092014

Bride/Baker Communication 101

Most brides think that bringing in a photo of their dream wedding cake will help clarify for their bakers what it is that they want and expect on their big day.

[shaking head] Those sweet, silly girls.

In reality, these photos are more like "guidelines." A springboard, if you will, from which the baker may or may not spring - and then into heretofore unheard-of realms of artistic "expression."

Perhaps some examples will help.

 

Bride Laurie S. asked for this cake, only in ivory and with blue flowers instead of white:

(Photo & cake by Martha Stewart)

 

Instead, she got this:

"It's boxy, and it's blue and white. What more do you want?"

 

Kirstie also wanted a cascading floral design, like this:

Which her baker recreated pretty well, except for one key detail:

S/he used real flowers instead of sugar ones.

Once the petals shriveled, Kirstie's cake design became less "cascading flowers" and more "attacking butterflies." Which isn't horrible, I suppose, but it is kind of hard to resist the urge to flap your arms and shoo them off.

(Note: The silver thing is their topper, which the baker laid flat instead of standing up. Or maybe the butterflies just knocked it over. :D)

 

Sharon L. wanted this gorgeous topsy-turvy design:

(Made by Lisa's Creative Cakes - and I totally want one.)

...only in 3 tiers and using her colors of fuchsia, orange, and lime.

Her baker's interpretation?

Remember that springboard I mentioned? Well, some are a LOT springier than others.

 

And finally, this bride wanted her seashell-themed cake to rise to new heights:

 

Instead, she got one that was apparently dropped from great heights:

Think it was served with a pancake dinner?

[snicker]

Monday
Jun302014

7 Seriously Ugly Wedding Cakes To Make Your Day Better

Wow, you guys really like your wedding wrecks, don't you?

And by "your" wedding wrecks, I of course mean someone ELSE'S wedding wrecks.

Because you are terrible, terrible people.

We must be related.

 

Now, remember, a wedding cake is the most important cake in a person's blah-de-blah-look at this wreck:

On the bright side, there are cupcakes.

On the top side, there's this:

I think it says "M and H."

Why did the baker use "and" instead of an ampersand?
The world... may never know.

 

Ever wonder what a cake would like like wrapped in wet tissue paper?

WONDER NO MORE.

 

This next one is Smurf-tastic:

In fact, I believe the bride's exact words were, "So help me, I'm gonna smurfin' SMURF that smurfing baker!"

 

So...

...that happened.

 

The bride asked for steampunk:

She got steamed poop.

 

Every time I see a wedding cake like this, I think the same thing:

If only that camouflage worked.

 

At least it didn't have a weedy deer skull on it, though!
AHAHAHAHAHAWAIT:

The swan pillars are a nice touch.

The intestine topping, not so much.

 

Thanks to an anonymous bride, an anonymous wedding guest, Katie F., Judy M., another Anony M., Shari A., & Ashley P. for helping me give brides-to-be everywhere nightmares. SLEEP TIGHT, LADIES.

*****

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