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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Wedding Wrecks (103)

Wednesday
Feb072018

These Wedding Wrecks Could Use A Fairy Godmother

So this is love

Mmm hmm mm mmm

 

So this... is love?

 

So this is what makes life

 

"divine"

 

I'm all aglow

Mmm hmm mm mmm

 

And now I know...

 

The key to all heaven

 

is mine!

 

So this is the miracle

That I've been dreaming of!

Mmm hmm mm mmm
Mmm hmm mm mmm

So this... is... love!

 

Thanks to Jesse R., Laura G., Kim J., Casey J., Margaret S., Vickie S., & Anony M. for the wrecky ever after.

*****

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Wednesday
Jan312018

Throw The Bouquet (Away)

I can't tell you how many wedding Wrecks I've seen salvaged with nothing more than a few well-placed bunches of fresh flowers.

These...are not those saves.

Believe it or not, that's a 3-tiered cake. See how effectively the gigantic seed pods hide the flaws in the top tier? They ran out for the bottom two, though, and were forced to randomly spill stuff on the table cloth to help "distract the eye." Cocoa powder or dirt? That is the question.

 

Other questions come to mind here, however:

Questions like: "Why?" and, "Why?" and, "For the love of pretty pastry platters, WHY?!?"

 

Since fresh flowers do have the nasty tendency of dying, though, I bet some of you are asking why bakers don't just use fake ones.

I will answer your question [dramatic pause]...with another question:

Ever contemplate sucking icing off a fabric leaf?

(Don't worry, this was not a wedding cake. It was a 20th wedding anniversary cake. Which, you know, makes it all better.)

Still, at least you can always count on silk flowers to be dust-free, hygienic, and easy to sanitize. That's why it's OK to just jam them all in the icing:

[blink blink]

BWAHAHAHAHAHA HOOHAA HEEHAHAH!

[wiping eyes] Dust free! Heehee! Ah, I crack myself up sometimes.

 

You know, Amy, Kasey R., & Anony M., I give "deadpan" a good name. I call it "Fuzzywuzzkins."

*****

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