Today's bride had an interesting request for her wedding: she wanted a pirate ship for the cake.
The baker was totally onboard, though, [snerk] and even sent over this inspiration picture so the bride would know what to expect on her Big Day.
You're seeing it now, right? All white, roses... I'll be darned if this isn't pretty elegant!
Ahh, but trim the sails and lash the rigging, ye scurvy dawgs, 'cuz here comes the actual wedding cake our anonymous bride got instead:
Now that's a cake for private tears.
(Privateers? Eh? EH?)
You know, I could almost forgive the general fold-out-sofa-bed-on-blue-shag-carpet vibe going on here, but I cannot - CANNOT - get past those hysterical little "sails." Seriously. The longer you look at them, the funnier it gets. Like a hippo using a moist towelette square to preserve her modesty.
And that mental image you're having right now? Still not as funny as those sails.
Thanks to my anonymous bride minion, who I'm pretty sure is why the rum is gone. But hey, who could blame her?