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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Wrecky Replay (44)

Wednesday
Feb052014

Look Out, Germany

I don't mean to brag, but I'm pretty much an expert on the German language. Yep. Two point five years of public high school German right heeere, playah! In fact, I would be saying all this "auf Deutsch," but I don't want to dazzle y'all with my linguistic...um...awesomeness.

Anyway, I mention this because today's Wreck is so hilariously horrendous that I may have to lapse into German to adequately describe it.

Ready?

Here goes:

 

Gross unpassend fliegend Fekalie-Kuchen!

Taschenrechner!!
Wo IST die Toiletin? Fahrvergnügen?
Ich bin ein Berliner!
Schnell! Schnell!

 

Ahem. Well, I think that gets the point across.

It should be noted that the cake was supposed to read, "Germany, HERE we come!" (Ah, those pesky, hilarity-inducing homonyms.)

Whether the cake was supposed to look like a baked poo souffle with a side of #2 nuggets, however, is anyone's guess. (Although I'm guessing "no.")

 

Hey, Sarah R., keep it down, will ya?

*****

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Wednesday
Jan222014

Confectionary Compensating

Men, we need to talk.

Ladies, if you could just give us a minute? Thanks.

[tapping foot while 99.6% of readership leaves the room]

[whispering] Right, then. Listen, guys. I know some of you might be "concerned" that your bride-to-be has had wedding cake in the past. And yes, she probably has!

Hey, some girls have had lots of wedding cake.

 

And sure, ok, maybe they were fairly large cakes.

Maybe they were even huge cakes.

 

But that doesn't mean she won't be satisfied with a perfectly average-sized cake!

(Ok, you can't see her face - but I'm sure she's thrilled.)

 

So even if your wedding cake seems a bit small and overgrown...

 

Or perhaps leans to the right...

 

Or even has a little trouble staying upright...

 

...the important thing is to remember that your bride loves you, no matter what. The cakes of the past are the cakes of the past! No matter how massive and sweeping and awe-inspiring they may have been.

Er...

And if all else fails, you can always buy a Ferrari.

 

Thanks to Kimber M., Anony M., Julia H., Tessa D., Adrienne H., Jamie, Rachel O., and Anony M., who can come back in now.

*****

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