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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Wrecky Replay (22)

Wednesday
Apr092014

Dolly Wants To Play

There really is nothing more terrifying than a creepy baby doll. I'm serious. They freaked me out as a kid and still manage to scare the pants off me today, what with their static staring eyes and little outstretched zombie arms and all.

Thankfully, there's a new baking trend that makes these dolls waaaaaay less creepy. (I'm lying; these are terrifying. Proceed with caution.)

Don't... make... eye contact...

All tucked in, and ready to kill.

 

"Ooh! I'll take that corner piece..."

"...and an arm. But that's it. I'm dieting."

 

Note: This next cake is not to scale.

Usually the pacifier is much larger.

 

Is it impolite to suck frosting off the baby's legs?

It is? Poor taste, huh?

...

Ok, what about its head?

...

No? Fine. I'll just collect my watermelon and show myself out.

 

Thanks, Valentina, Liz C., Carrie J., and Dana S.! Ya know, these cakes started out as creepy , but now they're looking kinda DELICIOUS. Mmmm.... babies.... grlslgrsagagagle.....

*****

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Wednesday
Apr022014

Picture Perfect

The Good: You hired a fabulous wedding photographer.

The Bad: Not so much with the baker.

The Ugly:

This has to be the most beautiful photo of a Wreck I've ever seen. The fact that the photographer submitted it - along with tales of watching the baker catch the toppling cake with her bare, unwashed hands before serving it - only adds to the beauty. 

And really, what's a photographer tasked with making a wedding Wreck look good supposed to do? Well, after careful study, I've come up with a few options.

 

Option 1: Try an action shot in the background.

"Ok, bride, groom? You two stand behind the cake here. Now...reach for that wineglass!"

"Hmm, not quite enough action. Bride's dad? How about a running tackle?"

 

Option 2: Flowers

"We're gonna need another bunch for the middle tier, stat."

 

Option 3: Blend it with a busy background.

"Cake? What cake?"

 

Option 4: More flowers.

 

No, seriously. MORE FLOWERS.

Perfect.

You: But, Jen, those cakes look great!

Me: Exactly.

 

Option 5: When all else fails... PhotoShop

Take that Wreck from this...

...to this!

The irony, of course, is they'll pay more for the retouched photo than they did for the cake.

Oh, and to whoever starts a cake photo retouching service after reading this post: I want my cut.

 

Thanks to Wreckporters D Tyler Photography., Tiffany A., Jen A., Wendy T., Andrew Jordan Photography, Jennifer J., Jacq, Random, & Rebecca Z.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.