The Big O Finale

They say she studied her head off for that diploma:

Which is an excellent segue for...

Brains, caps, heads - oh, yeah. It's allll comin' together.

John couldn't stop snort-giggling over this one. I think it has something to do with the hand placement:

Now I want to order a microphone cake (yes, that's supposed to be a microphone), walk into a random stranger's party, say something cryptic, like "That's why Hufflepuffs ALWAYS LOSE THEIR SOCKS", and then drop it. (The cake, not the party.)

Because "Messy Mic Drop Ruins Party" would be an awesome headline.

And finally, I believe this wedding baker was trying for something like this:

But instead....

0.O

Pro Tip: If your floral design starts to look like an angry vagina, maaaaybe re-think the Big O topper.

Thanks to Alison A., Chelsea M., Sahana S., & Vanessa, who'd like to point out that could also be a giant zero. (See? These things practically write themselves.)

*****

Do you shop Amazon? Then how about clicking through my affiliate link to shop? USA, UK, Canada.

 Visiting Amazon through those links will help support the site, and costs you nothing. Thanks, guys!

And from my other blog, Epbot:

Take Your Poet To Work Day

I was browsing a list of holidays this month and read that today is "Take Your Poet To Work Day."

Now, it's conceivable that "poet" is a typo for "pet"... but I choose to believe otherwise. 

Mostly because I posted all my best dog wrecks on Monday.

So without further ado: 

WORK POETS!  

Take it away.

a stiff upper lip
this is not what we asked for
crown into crayon

*****

There once was a gal from Nantucket 
Who worked here, but then said "Aw, tuck it."
She boarded a bus
And now's

But we've got the cake, so Nan, suck it.

*****

Orders are read
This "Boss" is blue

You wanted green?
Ha! Joke's on you.

***** 

Amidst the LEGO Ninja horde we stand
Contemplating the existentialism of existence
Ruminating the ramifications of vulnerability
Do we?
Do we really?

***** 

Ode To The Big Black Ding-A-Ling
I Found In My Break Room One Midsummer's Morn:

Goodbye, Tension
Hellooooooooo NURSE

*****

 A million pathways from which to choose
A million ways in which to lose
The people are waiting
Anticipating
All the things they can refuse
Oh, luckless me!
Oh, misery!
I must gamble with one desperate scheme:

If they don't like it, there's always ice cream.

Thanks to Anna B., Alex L., Pamela A., Sarah M., & Candy C. who all know that last cake doesn’t need an exclamation point because it’s more professional that way.

*****

Do you shop Amazon? Then how about clicking through my affiliate link to shop? USA, UK, Canada.

 Visiting Amazon through those links will help support the site, and costs you nothing. Thanks, guys!

And from my other blog, Epbot: