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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Oct022014

These Vintage Birthday Cakes Are Awesomely Bad

Were the good ol' days of cake decorating REALLY better?

And more importantly, can Jen find an excuse to post some of the rad vintage birthday cakes you guys have been sending in?

Let's find out, with...

EPIC CAKE BATTLES OF HISTORY!!

THEN:

I pity the fool who doesn't recognize Hulk Hogan & Mr. T.

VS

NOW:

 

THEN:

VS

NOW:

 

THEN:

VS

NOW:

"I stopped listening after 'cabbage'."
(Yup, it's cake. Cabbagey, cabbagey cake.)

 

THEN:

VS

NOW:

 

THEN:

VS

NOW:

Who WON? Who LOST?
YOU decide!!

And keep sending in those vintage birthday cakes, because seriously, these things are amazing.

 

Thanks to Robert T., Elizabeth B., Jason R., Tiki C., Jason R., Kristi C., Lindsay S., Karen H., Susan M., & Brittany J. - and a hat tip to Epic Rap Battles of History for all the lolz.

*****

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Wednesday
Oct012014

Insulting Inscriptions 101

Some handy tips when crafting the perfect cake zinger:

1) Don't misspell it.

There's nothing like borrowing song lyrics for a backhanded compliment, but misspell the thing (and omit all the necessary apostrophes) and you come across more crude than clever.

 

2) Be specific.

 

Ok, so Charity smells - but what does she smell like? Hmm? Could be roses, or cotton candy. (Mmm, cotton candy...) This is the time to release your inner muse: tell us what putrescent stench Charity is emitting, and really explore your literary space, ok?

 

3) Keep it simple.

 

While you're exploring that space, though, don't get so carried away that no one can tell what you're trying to say. Instead of an oddly phrased "Youth Forgot", why not go with something more straightforward? You know, like this:

See, the lack of exclamation marks or capital letters here really brings home juuust the right amount of indifference. Even the off-centered leaning seems to say, "Hey, I got you a cake, alright? Don't go pushing your geezer luck by expecting quality."

 

And lastly,

4) A little name-calling can go a long way.

Again, creativity is king here. Just watch your penmanship; that "Fink" could almost be mistaken for "Tink".

 

Thanks to this next one I think I've found my new favorite pet name for John:

Brilliant!

 

Kathryn R., Laura I., Sonya L., Mercedes R., Beth, & Kelli A., obviously your fathers smelled of elderberries.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.