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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Aug222017

Stop. Helping.

It's only natural, I know. You see all the wreckage on this blog and you think, "Ok, but surely I can keep my order from being wrecked, right? I mean, all I have to do is help the baker out a little!

"Why, if I just spell it out clearly, military style..."

Nice job, Ace.

 

"Or maybe if I write it all down...

 

"And if I indicate which part is the actual text..."

 

"Um... Or what if I ask for just a single letter? That's easy, right?"

Color me impressed. Or magenta. 

 

"Ok, fine, I get it. You've made your point. No text. I guess I'll just ask for a flower or something."

 "AAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGHHH!!"

 

Thanks to Katy E., Cristina B., Terry M., Brandt H., & Anony M. for making this post literally painful. 

*****

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Monday
Aug212017

I Can See Clearly Now... And... EW

I don't remember my 2012 slang very well - was this an actual thing people said?

"You're eggs is prego."

There are so many things wrong with that sentence, my brain just imploded.

 

Still, at least it was a "closed belly" shower.

What does that mean?

Aw, I'M SO GLAD YOU ASKED.

BEHOLD!!

The "Peek-A-Boo, I Eat You" Appetite-Suppress-Inator!

(Have I been watching too much Phineas and Ferb reruns? Yes, yes I have.)

 

Now, that's pretty good, but you must admit: the baby-embedded-in-clear-gelatin is kind of hard to see.

So for maximum "Inator" effectiveness, we're gonna need to open that baby (belly) up.

THAT'S BETTER.

[head tilt]

Hmmm, but is it possible to make the whole thing shinier?

You know, in a more seeping, moist, and gelatinous kind of way?

YES!

Just think, with these Appetite-Suppress-Inators, soon, Cake Wrecks will RULE the ENTIRE TRI-STATE AREA! Mwuah-ha-haaaa!

 

Thanks to Rish, Rachel G., Karen Q., & Diana M., who'd all look adorable in brown fedoras, I just know it.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.