Search

My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Sep192014

How To Talk Like An Internet Pirate

Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day!

And hey, you don't have to be a pirate in order to sound like one!

So here are a few handy phrases to help you fake it today:

- "You want to watch Game of Thrones? Because I have, like, ALL the episodes."

 

- "With this new Google Fiber, my download speeds are pushing 1.21 giga watts!"

 

- "Hey baby, you wanna engage in some peer-to-peer file sharing?"

BONUS FOLLOW UP: "It's not just a BitTorrent, girl, it's a BIG Torrent. Yeeeah."

 

- "Oh, you still pay for cable shows? That is adorable."

 

- "It's not stealing if you share!"

 

- "What?! DMCA takedown?"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

 

- "Um, hello there, officer. Can we... help you?"

 

Thanks to Michelle D., Ginny V., Suzanne S., Anony M., Patti, Veda, & Roscoe for being such good mates today.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

Thursday
Sep182014

The Colors, Man. THE COLORS.

Three words, bakeries:

Mandatory Drug Testing.

I mean, I'm not saying anything - I'm NOT - but I'm just saying.

It's a butt. That sprouted a face. With pigtails.

Any questions?

 

Because if not, *I* have one:

Why is this cake trying to slap me?

"Up high?" Yeeeeah, I think someone's high enough, thank you.

 

I should mention that none of today's cakes are special orders, btw; they were all found hanging out in the regular display case, like it weren't no thang, chicken wang!

Aaaand now I will never use that phrase again.

 

Hey, you know that thin line between genius and insanity?

Yeah, we crossed that MILES back:

I call it, "Surrealistic Post-Modern Plastic Flotsaminism."

OH BOY!

 

These cookies taunt me, you guys. They taunt me with their smug presence, defying rational explanation and blowing virtual raspberries in the face of all common sense.

Plus they won't stop staring.

 

Of course we can all debate the merits of bakery drug testing, but in the end, it is the bakers themselves who get the final word:

Ahh, excellent choice.

 

Thanks to Jen & Jake, Steph H., Jeffrey A., Cinthya F., Sarah S., & Lauren L. for giving us something to squack about.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.