Pro Tip For Wedding Cakes: Don't Have A Cow

Wait, it's Bad Poetry Day again? Don't we have like 6 of these every year?

Not that I'm complaining: I will happily torture you with my Vogon Entry Level verse any time, ya hoopy froods.

A-hem hem hem.

A-phlegm phlegm phlegm.

::bowing:: 

Thank you, thank you very much.

Next!

My best wishes

wouldn't include a field of dirty snow

Would you(R)s?

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::starts beatboxing::

Seven eyeballs!

Seven eggs!

Seven flowers 

With sticky legs!

Wickee wickeee WOO

::mic drop::

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Udderly bovine

Cow sweet and Moo-ving!

Think we should tip?

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Something exploded on this cake

Of this I know not what to make: 

Was it fruit, was it dough?

Wouldn't YOU like to know

For $40 I'll make you a plate

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 You'll have your LOOKS

Your pretty face!

And don't forget the importance of...

BODY LANGUAGE

Thanks to Caki Z., Channing F., Chelsea C., Carolyn, & Lauren W. for the poetry in motionless shock.

P.S. You know what's more fun than writing bad poetry? Reading your cat's mind:

Phrenology Cat Ceramic Bust & Booklet

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

A Cake Full of Butter Lies

Birthday girl Jenna Claire is allergic to tree nuts. Unfortunately, this means she had to share her cake with "Trez Hats".

(If you think that handwriting is bad, imagine what the order form looked like.)

And for little Ava's birthday, her folks splurged and got her the lovechild of Satan and Minnie Mouse:

[chipmunk voice] "RED RUM RED RUMMMM..."

This was on the side of a wedding cake, so....

...looks like someone DID believe it's not butter.

And finally, the best cookie cake mic drop ever:

BYE BICTHIS.

Thanks to Ryan U., Kaleigh E., KT, LJ, & Aleisha C. for the fond farewell.

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And finally, because it made me laugh:

Ceramic "BUTTA" Dish

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And from my other blog, Epbot: