I Literally Can't Think Of Any More Literal Puns

Oooh, look, they remembered the H this time!

That joke totally makes sense if you remember The Cake That Started It All. 
(Or the cover of the Cake Wrecks book.)

"So what do you want me to write?"

Gotta love how the baker drew her own reaction .gif.

"Any special design or colors?"

"No, just a 'Happy Birthday' theme."

"Did you say you wanted a number?"

"Yeah, a big 10."

"Anything else?"

ROGER THAT.

Thanks to Cynthia H., Donna B., Erik N., Maria N., & Rachel R., who knows REAL men use antlers in all of their decorating. ("Oh what a guy, Gas-TOOOOOON!")

*****

Oh btw, if you want your own literal LOL in a more permanent material, Amazon has just the thing:

“Written in Stone” Stone

For the person you never want to take for granite.

The Clucking Dead

Because bakeries are running out of ideas, I give you:

John Deere Zombie Chickens!

Also known as The Clucking Dead.

On a scale of 1 to gouging-out-your-own-eyes, how disturbing is this?

Personally, I think it falls somewhere between "Ped Eggs" and toddlers-who-won't-break-eye-contact.
[shudder]

But really, the best part are the buttons. Go on, think about it.

Ever heard the expression, "getting sh**-faced?"

'Cuz someone took that WAY too literally

Ew.

Angie wanted to get her friend a cake, but there was a problem: apparently "Happy 50th Birthday, Melissa" wouldn't fit.

But don't worry, the baker was still able to squeeze something out:

So moving.

(Do you suppose the baker was wiped after this? Flushed with success? Ready for the next stream of orders? Hey, where are you going? [HAHA THAT WAS STILL A PUN] Come back! I haven't used my famous "You're in trouble" line yet!)

Thanks to Sarah P., Dimitra L., Gina V., & Angie W. for caring enough... to give a crap.