Your Goose Is Cooked, But The Turkey Is Traumatizing

Ever wonder why bakers keep making cakes that look like cooked turkeys?

Or rather, cakes that are supposed to look like cooked turkeys?

 They just, I dunno... make me a little uncomfortable.

Look at those fleshy leg cannons. It's not right.

Here's one for people who say turkey is too dry:

EXTRA MOIST

And let's talk about how funny they look from the front!

Or is this the back?

::head tilt::

You know what, let's not think about that too long.

The important take-away here is it looks like a bald guy who's been hit in the face with a pecan pie. A naked bald guy. Wearing wrist ruffles. Who has no legs.

And once you see this as a 10 gallon cowboy hat, there's no going back:

Howdy, poultry.

Even when bakers get it right, and the cake looks like an honest-to-goodness turkey, I have some issues:

For one, I will never look at Pigs in a Blanket the same.

 (Whyyy are they there??)

Listen, bakers, I think I speak for all humanity when I say NO ONE wants to see two cooked turkeys on their tables this Thanksgiving. So please, just give the people what they want!

MORE POO-WANGS!

Thanks to Amanda S., Linda M., Robin R., Jennifer G., Nathan A., Alexandra M., & Melanie C. for that fowl content.

 *****

OK, so it's no pig-in-a-blanket, but this plastic yodeling pickle is EXACTLY what your holiday season needs:

Yodelling Pickle

The reviews are an entertainment all on their own, though several seem to suggest this looks like something OTHER than a pickle, so good luck solving that mystery. ;)

Use Less, Wreck More

Today is Use Less Stuff Day - a time to push back against rampant materialism, reflect on life goals, and really ask ourselves the tough questions.

Like:

Do Snow White and the Dwarves really NEED a helicopter?

I mean, maybe they're Ok with just a monster truck, motorcycle, jeep, Lightning McQueen, and an airplane:

Or if not, Hulk could just throw them really hard.

And while we're cutting back, how many choking hazards do you REALLY need for a one-year-old?

Or for your cupcakes?

And why does Hilary Duff need so many Barbie accessories?

(Hey look, it's the pink boot we all lost when we were six! [No? Just me?])

My point is, why waste so much plastic flotsam when a single, well-placed element can be just as...
uh....

That is, I mean, sometimes it only takes ONE to... er...

Huh.

Well, maybe if we just put our heads together...

Perfect.

Thanks to Mike & Marja, Joyce W., Anony M., Nelly R., Melanie L., Mary V., & Susan S. for showing us how to get a head without paying an arm and a leg.

*****

I realize this is going the opposite direction of "less stuff"... but did you know you can buy a pack of 100 rubber duckies for about $40?

Rubber Duck Assortment

And they're so cute!

Think of the possibilities...