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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Sunday
Jun222008

Naked Mohawk-Baby Carrot Jockeys

This cake is so disturbing, I'm almost glad the picture doesn't include the whole thing. The plastic clone babies wearing naught but mohawks are bad enough, but then they're also riding carrots. What do you do with that? It looks like some kind of perverted vegetable rodeo, or maybe a bizarre clone military exercise, what with their little plastic fists raised high in identical salutes.

And what kind of occasion calls for a "naked babies riding carrots" decor, anyway? No, wait, maybe I don't want to know...

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Reader Comments (207)

OMG! I am laughing so hard right now! Even though the picture is funny by itself, the caption and your wit make it even better! I couldn't even read it to my husband I was laughing (& crying) so hard!

August 17, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

OMG! This has got to be my favorite of the posts. Looking at this one alone (well, it's really reading the captions) makes me instantly start crying with laughter. Hilarious.

August 17, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

I have to disagree as I think this cake is just f'king fantastic.

August 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLotta

OMG...I just want to let everyone know Dr Pepper burns coming out the nose also...Im so glad I found this blog!! Thanks for the 440 am giggles

August 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNecie

ROFLMTO!!! I only needed to glance at that photo and I burst out laughing! Then I looked at it properly and went apopleptic! (Is that even a word?) And the caption! It keeps going through my head like one crazy word! Oh, no! Here it is again - Nakedmohawkbabycarrotjockeys! Aaaahhahahahahahaha!

What really makes this one gold for me is the style of photo, all down at the mohawk-baby level, up close and personal. You can see how the naked mohawk-babies have been squished into their little carrot saddles. Priceless. Whoo boy.

August 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This, pun intended, takes the cake. How creative must one be to come up with the idea of carrot riding mohawk sporting nekkid plastic babies??? Was the mom to be like a carrot farmer or something. And why the cheap out of only buying 7 carrot riding mohawk sporting nekkid plastic babies? This is so weird in so many ways!

August 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This may be the funniest cake I have ever seen... I've got to find those little plastic babies to put on my next cake.

There is a small spelling error in your post, though... "occasion" should have two C's and one S.

August 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterINTan

I am practically CHOKING from laughing so hard! I can't breathe and tears are streaming down my face!! My coworkers must be wondering what's wrong with me. Oh my gosh, I haven't laughed that hard in a loooooong time. Freaking fabulous.

August 21, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAndreaB

Cake? Oh. I thought this was a still from the Beijing Olympics Opening Ceremonies.

August 22, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRyan

This is what you call someone in charge of a baby shower forgot to order the cake... so they went to costco, the only one available was a carrot cake and they threw some babies on there... they look as though they are bullriding!

August 22, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLiz :)

oh holy jeebus. i about lost it. i'm so disturbed. this is like a bad 80s japanese music video gone even wronger than originally intended. whyyyyyy? i.just.don't.get.it. carrots? babies?

*breathe*

August 23, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think I get it. Both the babies and the carrots represent newness; the harvest, celebration. It is only fitting that they should be paired in what looks to be the ultimate Easter/Spring joyful cake of happybabyness. Harrah!


I need to stop smoking stuff before reading this blog.

August 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Don't you see people? It's not necessarily SEVEN babies, though that's how many are shown...It's a Naked Mohawk Baby on every other carrot! It's a pattern!!!

Best cake ever AND BEST BLOG EVER!
_Steph

August 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

Hi- I really like it! really funny and entertaining. I will make it point to stop by! thanks

August 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLinn

This should absolutely be for a bris (Jewish circumcision ceremony)!

September 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Mr T approves of this cake wreck I pity da fool who doesn't love carrot cake with mohawk baby jockies.

Seriously tho I think I snorted laughing at this omfg soooooooooooooo funny.

September 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLyn

I just came across this blog from The Consumerist and am making my way (teary-eyed from crying) through the whole thing. This? Oh, this is now my new desktop wallpaper.

September 9, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNora

Holy Beta Carotene Batman! It's the Travis Bickle Baby Carrot Brigade arriving in full force. Beware the Marauding Mohawked Munchkins!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Maybe they're ttc? Heh.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCaitlin

OK, I'm only drinking water and it didn't come out my nose. I laughed so hard it came out, well, I, er... leaked!

Jen, you are absolutely hilarious and so are all the comments. I'm sending this out in my daily email blast tomorrow. Goes out to about 1,700 foodies who know that nothin' goes better with carrots than mohawk wearin', fist raisin', rodeo lovin', naked, plastic Aryan infants on their way to a Bris!

Love it. Thanks for the fodder for my email blast.

September 11, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterEve Williams

You crack me UP! I have forwarded your blog to many friends with a warning not to have any liquid in their mouth so they don't SPEW!

HILARIOUS!!

Whenever I need a good laugh...I just come take a peek! FUNNY!!

September 11, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMissy

But why...? WHY must the babies have mohawks???

LOL!! I just found your blog this morning (via the Sexual Harrasment cake), and I love it. It's a SCREAM!

Terri

September 27, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTerri

Haha, this looks like something out of an 80's music video... I want a cake like this for my next birthday.

September 28, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

LMAO

October 2, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Zeerip's

I love your blog & read it all the time for a good laugh. The first time I found it my 3 year old saw this and said, "Mommy, why are the babies riding carrots?" I could only say, "I have no idea!"

October 2, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteramberwaves

Not only is this is probably the most ridiculous cake design I've ever seen, it (along with the caption) also provoked the longest laugh I've had in a long time! :-) Too good!

October 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAaron of Minneapolis

Clearly this was for the opening ceremonies for the Beijing Olympics. :)

October 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Another inappropriate baby shower cake? What better way to say "I hope you have multiple punk babies with unhealthy addictions to phallic foodstuffs".

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDominique

I know I already commented, but I have a second-hand comment: I posted a link to this cake at a forum, and someone there said it looked like a cheesy '80s punk rock album cover. :-) (I tend to agree.)

October 9, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAaron of Minneapolis

I think this is a Sandra Lee, Semi Homemade, recipe that didn't make the tablescape...

October 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterScott in Maplewood

oh.. my.. god..

The babies in question here, are actually supposed to be used in King Cakes, these are done leading up to Fat Teusday, during mardi-gras, etc.

Obviously, this bakery(I can only assume) had too many babies left over and viola!

Love the blog!
Keep the wreck rolling!!

October 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTom

Where can I find those babies? A quick search online found nothing but actually CUTE babies--I need the NMBCJs to be authentic for my friend Mike's cake.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSpinner

I just thought ya know when kids blow out the candles in a cake and then they like to lick the iceing off the cake?Just imagine how they have to clean off those baby clones.

I really love that photo thought it was funny.^^

November 1, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I was doing fine until this one. For some reason this one elicited the painful, choking, can't catch my breath, tears streaming down my face laughter reaction.

Thank you.

November 9, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMeeshbeer

definitely one of the weirdest cakes I have ever seen...LOL

November 12, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLou

Naked Mohawk-Baby Carrot Jockeys Hail Hitler

November 26, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

So it's not often I get to read a blog with the phrase "perveted vegetable rodeo" in it. Fabulous blog I've nearly died reading it.

December 1, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSofi

I've been browsing for a while, but this is definitely my favorite post.

My stomach hurts from laughing so hard...or maybe it's from all that frosting.

Keep up the good work!

-Samantha K.

December 3, 2008 | Unregistered Commentersammik

Yes I'd like to order a "pre-sliced" carrot cake. Oh and since it's for a baby shower could you put little babies on some of the slices? THANKS! I'll pick it up on Saturday!

It still gets me every time!

December 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterChrista

I have just laughed my way through the cake picture and comments.You should write a book!
I now have the perfect Happy 40th Anniversary gift ever! My husband's humor is already the best. With this he will be armed for the next 40 years...Thank you for the "gift that keeps on giving"!

December 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Boring person here:
my guess is, a Chinese baby shower
with good-luck symbols for a male
infant.

December 8, 2008 | Unregistered Commenter=Tamar

Wow, this is the funniest caption I've read. Ever. I was eating a cinnamon bun with icing at the time I read it and it exploded all over the screen.

December 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

If there ever were something that you truly appreciated, this is it...

It's life changing really... For all future cake-needing occasions, I will, at random, pick two 'things' at random, and combine them into such a masterpiece as this one is.

For example, and to make it un-biased, and thus, potentially, hopefully, almost as funny... http://watchout4snakes.com/creativitytools/RandomWord/RandomWordPlus.aspx

And, the first two that seem to fit the 'things' category will be it.

My first two: boat & cat

And to honor this cake, I'll always, at a 45 degree angle, have the larger, riding the smaller, en masse.

It is a cake revolution.

December 23, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's a vegan punk fertility cake.

December 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I can think of what happened. Its just speculation, of course.

"I want a carrot cake with babies on it."

*arrives at home from the bakery, takes the box into the kitchen, puts the box onto the counter, and lifts the lid*

...!

What in leaping jackalopes is this!?

Hence, yet another misinterpreted order.

January 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMina

I know what occasion calls for naked babies riding on carrots, the BEST day of the year: January 26: Ellen DeGeneres' birthday

January 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCharlotte Loves Ellen

I just discovered this hilarious blog today, courtesy of the National Post newspaper. I have a bunch of those little plastic babies too!! Only they have little angel wings and glow in the dark. I think they are supposed to hang from a Christmas tree. Would they ever look great glowing in the dark while riding these sugar carrots on top of a cake .....

January 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDiana

Oh dear god.....
V. disturbing indeed....
Carrot cake is going to be forever ruined for me.
XD

January 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I see 11 babies and it is a pattern duh

January 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The babies' hair looks like a variety of pubic hair "styles". From the rather dated, boomer style triangle (a moot point perhaps, as they're all busy loosing those triangles to the ravages of age) to the "runway". No bald/ "Brazilian" babies in sight, though. ?
A caveat to those whom might be "offended":
Babies and ladies'pubic regions/ love 'n marriage/ horse 'n carriage.....
like that. you get it.

January 28, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersquanderoot

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