My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

What About Spongebob?

I have to preface this post with a little caveat: I've never watched Spongebob SquarePants. Well, unless you count those times at CiCi's Pizza, since the TVs there are hard-wired to Cartoon Network for the resident herds of screaming little leaguers. (John and I like to visit sometimes to remind ourselves why we're not having children. And for the barbecue pizza.)

(This is Spongebob, btw, for all you non-parents and/or subterranean dwellers.)

So anyway, let me apologize in advance for the lack of Spongebobian references. I like to think that most of you wouldn't get them anyway.

Spongebob is essentially a big rectangle, right? So naturally, if you want to recreate him in cake you should always go with a bunch of round cupcakes:

Like so.

It does kind of look like we're peeking into Spo's (Can I call him Spo? Anyone care? No? Good.) casket, though, doesn't it? Plus some prankster has ripped his nose off and turned his tie upside down. [tsking] So disrespectful.

Speaking of which...

I know you can still see part of Spo's eye here, but don't worry: The baker will cover that up when s/he writes a misspelled, abbreviated version of your name there.

This next one is like the Fiji Mermaid of Cupcake Cakes (patooey!*):

Only instead of half mammal, half fish, it's half Spongebob, half...pedestal? Robot? TV on wheels? I dunno - what the heck is that thing? You tell me. Best answer may or may not get posted here, so gimme your best shot, punks.

Oh, and we're just getting started with the Spongebob Wreckage, so prepare to have gads more sprung at you sometime later this week.**

*I think we should all spit every time the horrific term "cupcake cake" [patooey!] or its abbreviation "CCC" [patooey!] is mentioned. Y'all down with that? Just watch your aim: people and keyboards don't much appreciate being spat upon.

**I just used "gads" and "sprung" in the same sentence. Dude, someone get me a sweater; I am sooo cool.

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Reader Comments (144)

I can't believe one of the commenters called Spongebob vulgar. Spongebob is like an underwater Winnie the Pooh. He's yellow, innocent, likes to laugh, and his best friend is pink. His favorite past time is blowing bubbles, for pete's sake. Even if I weren't a Spongebob fan, I'd be offended by these cakes.

I've never gotten Spongebob. Granted, I'm not a mom, and haven't watched it much, but the kids I occasionally tend love that little guy. While less tedious than other kids shows, I still find it, well, tedious, and don't enjoy it at all.

That being said, I know what Spongbob should look like, and I don't think I would have recognized any of those cakes as Mr. Squarepants had you not told me it was him. Whatever Spongbob is, he didn't diserve this treatment.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRedd

Bwahaha! Patooey! That kills me! Too freakin' funny. I WILL spit at each and every cupcake cake (patooey!) reference, I promise!! Bahaha!!

I LOATHE Spongebob...hate the little yellow dirtbag with a passion. Thank heavens my son doesn't like him either and am therefore spared the pain of watching such an idiotic show.

Once again Jen, your wit amuses!!!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTrish

For the record, Spongebob is on Nickelodeon, not Cartoon network :)

So sad that I know this.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The last one looks to me like Spongebob has been sacrificed on a stone altar. See the blood on those top two rocks? That's not a wreck, that's justice.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBrian

WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE? I understand why you don't like him, but MUST YOU CALL HIM A DIRTBAG, Trish? GAWD! HE'S FRICKIN ANNOYINGLY (by that i mean REALLY annoying) FUNNAY! GAWD!!!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNetFreak

I kind of like the first CCC. I won't lie.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFhtrkstr101

Clearly this is a happy loaf of a bread on some type of argyle cake stand. Obviously!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenter-dj

C'mon SpongeBob has got to be one of the easiest characters to make into a cake! I think even I could make a decent SpongeBob cake.

I also dont get why so many people think the cartoon is 'vulgar'? Annoying sometimes yes, educational, no, but its harmless. Its the only thing my 2 year old will watch. In fact 'SpongeBob' was one of his first words!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

You should watch Spongebob, I'm 41 and watch it even when no kids are around. The writers of Spongebob, throw some jokes in that only grown ups will get. It's very funny and very well written. Dont hate it because it's a cartoon.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDarth Rob

Actually, I don't mind the CCC in this case -- I think the edges nicely suggest his porous contours.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMackenzie

The brown poopie like swirls on the first one are freaky deaky.
hehe my word verification is GRAIN!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commentertwinklescrapbooks

I cannot believe the amount of "Nazi" parents who don't let their kids watch Spongebob Squarepants. One of you even excluded cartoon network and nickelodeon. What kind of childhood are your kids going to look back on, oh I bet your those "structure" parents. Every hour of a kids day has to be planned out with no time for FUN or CARTOONS. I hope your kids grow up and hate you!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDarth Rob

I think my favorite part of cake 1- would be the scrubbing it would take to get your face and teeth clean after eating those "shoe" blobs.

That last one is not Spongebob, its his lesser known cousin; Chamois Pete.
Chamois Pete was involved in a factory accident that left him scooter bound, and since he has no arms, he just sort of sits there and doesn't want to be part of the show.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

And here I didn't think it was possible for SpongeBob to look any worse than he already does. Wow.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFreedomFirst

Okay, seriously.

I love Cakewrecks. I know about what time your entries get posted and I have a reader in my phone automatically set up so I always see new ones ASAP. I'm always showing your posts to whoever is around when I read them.

I also love Spongebob. I don't have kids and am not sure I want them, but this is almost irrelevant given how wacky and underlyingly intelligent the show is. I am 99.9% sure you would like it, Jen, knowing your sense of humor, if you gave it a chance. (Note: there *are* a number of episodes that hit below the mark, so I advise seeing maybe three episodes before you make a final judgement call.) I understand being put off at first: he's got an annoying laugh, the show is absurd in many ways, etc. When SB first debuted, I refused to watch it, too. I even hated the name "Spongebob Squarepants" and made fun of it. However, after one of my high school English teachers mentioned it (he even linked it to our then-current study of Existentialist literature), I gave it a shot, and it grew on me.

If you don't at least try...I may stop reading and recommending Cakewrecks. I'm just *that* insulted by your turning your nose up at the little guy. Sniffing at Spongebob without even reviewing the evidence? It's just a dealbreaker, plain as that. Sorry.


downtown (dot) lindsay (dot) brown (at) gmail (dot) com

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLindsay


April 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjenny

I love SpongeBob -- Sailor Mouth is a classic episode. If I had not had kids -- I would have probably never watched it.

You should watch it.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

That cake looks like a slice of bread popping out of a toaster on wheels!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChad White

That second one looks more like the Fry's Electronics "Charlie Chip" character to me.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterinfmom

That last one must be Spongebob on his latest adventure into space. He's crammed into a Mars rover, right? Might also explain the face - he's running out of air. :)

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKelli

Love Sponge-Bobbett pregnant with future BLUE-square Sponge-Bob baby. I think 'someone' might think a paternity test is in order here!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRobin Wendell

I think the Cakewrecks Community is going to the Dog.....River. (In Corner Gas whenever someone said "Woolerton" the spit alarm would start going off.)
I have never ever ever watched SpongeBob. I never hope to. My cousin really liked the show, but I think it's dumb.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJumpyham

I like the napkin tied around his neck.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle Wood

Just so you know, I nearly spit hot tea all over my keyboard. Twice.
Thank you for the giggle.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKay

Spongebob isn't really your style, Jen. But I'm still waiting for some good Napoleon Dynamite zingers.

Will I ever get my wish?


April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAlix

Perhaps if Spo and Rosie, from the Jetsons, had a baby (you, know in the Sealab – because I don't know how it would technically work otherwise) this would be an accurate likeness of the offspring.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJen Huddleston

The cupcake shoes in the second one are pretty funny. I'd eat one of those shoes. The other cakes, not so much.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHolly

I am here to defend Sponge Bob Square Pants. It is absolutely NOT a vulgar cartoon. He's a happy innocent sponge who constantly looks on the bright side of things. I love the little guy and it's a great cartoon. I have no idea why you would ever label it vulgar.
Rufus Opus, Rutaduta, Pokecheck, and "friends of" all are right on. :)) However, these cakes are not. Sad, sad, misrepresentation.

WV: ticke
As in..."I would be "ticke..d" if I had to pay for one of these.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCara

We've gone from Easter... the celebration of Sponge Bob?

My what a leap!!!

Let me guess...the segue was the Moses parting the red sea cake, right? (that water connection, get it?)

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMe

I was going to try to make one of these cakes for my niece, but had a feeling it would turn out as bad as the ones in this post, so instead I made her one of these:

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBianca

Spongebob is 10 years old. It's unbelievable.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSteve

Gawd... I am SO GLAD I'm not the only one who's never seen an episode of that show.

Other twenty-somethings look at me weird for not catching the in-jokes. I look at them weird for watching the cartoon equivalent of the special ed day care down the street.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Feel free to laugh at me as I display my incredible nerdiness, but here goes. I usually hate CCC's (how about an *ugh* instead of a SPIT?), but I actually think that they suit Spongebob quite well, due to the porous texture of sponges and all that. He's not just a flat square, he has holes and bumps and stuff.

Also, to count myself completely in the minority here, I think that the first two Spongebob cakes are quite good (aside from the huge black writing across his face in the 2nd--seriously, who could possibly think that's a good idea?).

I also think that, while the last cake doesn't look a smidge like SB, it is actually kinda cute in its own right.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Jen Huddleston and I are on the same page. I'm pretty sure that one cake is a cross between Spongebob and Rosie the Robot (from the Jetsons). Thoughts?

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

Haha, this post reminded me of the countless Spongebobs I had to put on ice cream cakes.

It's pretty hard to wreck a cake when all of your images are done with a projector :p

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSamantha

These cakes are truly horrifying. What else is horrifying? Parents who will voluntary poison their kids sh*t with processed garbage "food" (CiCi's pizza, brownies, mac & cheese made with god knows how many chemicals and preservatives) but will physically block a TV showing a funny, naive, kind-hearted animated fellow who values his friends above everything else...while allowing the horror show of the news flashes on CNN to burn their children's brains with images of fire, flood, famine, war and celebrity gossip. Go America!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNorma

The last Spongebob looks like more like a parfait than anything else.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterwdwebdev

I never realized that appreciation of Spongebob was so polarized. Clearly, you either love it or hate it. I've never seen it, so I can't judge, but wow, that last cake looks nothing like his picture.

How can bakers be so off and still manage to sell cakes?

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterScientific Chick

Those Spongebob cakes are awful! how hard is it to make a square character..SQUARE?
Jen, you really should watch a few episodes of Spongebob! Give him a chance!! I am 45 and I have seen my fair share of the shows because my kids loved it, and I think I now know most of the WHOLE opening song..."WHOOOOO...lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!!!!" and it goes on.....:-)

Oh and please don't call him "Spo"!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLinda

"Margaret said...

wait until you see the Burger King ad with squarepants for their kids meal. If I were Spongebob, I would go back to the sea and neve surface again."

I love that commercial and LOL every time I see it!!
"Booty is Booty!" LMAO

Spongebob rocks!...but these particular cakes do NOT.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterScraplin

I'm still shaking my head over the commenter who would rather have their young child watch CNN than Spongebob. Apparently they have no problem with kids watching coverage of bombings, murders, kidnappings, rapes, etc., but an innocuous cartoon about a happy, bubble-blowing sponge is inappropriate.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJamie and Angela

There was a silicone square cupcake pan for sale on QVC a day or 2 ago. In their presentation, they specifically mentioned it's prefect for cupcake cakes, and of course i thought of you. Is that weird that you've infiltrated my everyday life? Nah!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterErin W.

Oh my God, that last one is horrifying.

Also, you gotta watch Spongebob. It's pretty much the only real cartoon out now. (Except Flapjack.)

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatie R

I used to work at the Ocean Institute, where the idea for Spongebob was hatched... it was apparently an inside joke amongst the boat crew, as the sponge they used to clean up the heads when they got icky was a large square yellow thing. Mmmm. Toilet sponge cake. Fantastic.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Poor Spongebob #2!! I have no idea how he supports his huge body with those 2 millimeter wide spaghetti legs of his? And even if he *could* support himself, how in the would would his spaghetti legs not slip out of those clodhoppers of his?

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

I know, I know... I usually hate them too, but this Spongebob CCC by Roxie's is too cute.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterj

Jeeey Spongebob! Spongebob totally rocks!!

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMartine

NO!!! Those were professional?! Having just spent four hours decorating a Spongebob cake for a 6 yr old's birthday (not my child, incidentally!), I can personally attest that it is not THAT hard. I'd like to know where these people work? If they can work there, then surely so can I. I think a paycheck is in my future.

April 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBecky B

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