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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Mar082011

Deep Fried Thoughts

Today I thought we might celebrate "Marti Gras"


Or maybe even "Mardi Gra"

Whichever it is, I'm just psyched to know that both cakes are deep-fried.

Yessir, and that means it's time to PAPTY!!


With a deep-fried PAPTY cake!


Now, to enjoy your "papty" you're also going to need a bunch of deep-fried donuts cleverly disguised as deep-fried cupcakes disguised as...uh...whatever this is:

Mmmm. Deep-fried goodness.

Next you'll need to clarify that when you say something with Mardi Gras colors on it is ugly...

NOTE: This is ugly.

In a deep-fried kind of way.


...you are, indeed, "dissing" the Mardi Gras colors in general. In fact, you're dissing Mardi Gras, and its cultural origins, and every single person who has, does, or ever will celebrate it. Because, frankly - and I only tell you this because I care - you're kind of a bastard.

You'll also need a small plastic baby on the OUTSIDE of the pastry, because NO ONE bakes a small plastic baby INSIDE the cake, and only an IDIOT would say that anyone ever has.

Check it out: this donut still has its center!

Btw, I'm going to show you a funny cake now...

Tee-hee! Funny!

...but we're going to ignore that and focus instead on the cultural, economic, and quantum mechanical differences between "Cajuns" and "people who live in Louisiana." Because this is a humor blog, gosh dang it, and that is very, VERY relevant.

And finally, my friends, we're really going to need an Avatar cake with Mardi Gras masks on it.

Just 'cuz.


Theeeere we go.

Let the deep-fried PAPTY begin!

Many sprinkle-covered thanks to Amy S., Kathlyne B., Linda, Dora L., Berny B., Auntie N., Georgia F., & Samantha G., who all know better than to ever assume a humor blogger might be a) joking, b) sarcastic, and/or c) fully aware of the fact that most King Cakes are not deep-fried OR donuts and just thought it was funny and had no idea cake was suddenly such a serious business and don't mind this facial tic I just need to have a bit of a lie-down now if that's alright with you.

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Reader Comments (212)

Sorry. I read "deep fried cake" and could go no further.

LOL Love this site. Papty on campers!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGuinan

On the yellow cupcakes -- think those are attempts at a fleur de lis?

Some look like L (for Louisiana, perhaps?), most just look like squirmy worms.

That's appetizing.

wv - synop

I didn't synop to eat wormy cupcakes (nor did I ask for the anal probe!)

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

Oh how I love you guys! <3

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSandy

Snicker. Epcot is everywhere! I was just reading an article on Allrecipes.com about Mardi Gras cakes and they had the gall to refer to the plastic baby as a "Toy baby" which set off a major rant in the comments! It's NOT a TOY it's JESUS!!

It's a good thing they didn't mention the word fried.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPennieK

OMG, laughing through mouthfuls of pancake. If this Canadian were Cajun she'd want to be deep fried for sure.

-Cheri, one of your many humourless Canadian fans.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Love you guys!

It helps when reading a humor blog to have a sense of humor. You can make fun of me and anything I love anytime. I'd be honored! :)

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDarla

@Craig -

Are you married? Do you want to be? Because I think I love you. LOL.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterA.J.

Awesome response to yesterday's much ado about nothing.

WV... kalgari
NOT where Cajuns are from. (I learned this in yesterday's comments!) LOL

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

To Anon @ 11:54 -

Really? REALLY???? Somehow making fun of ugly king cakes (not ALL king cakes, just the ugly ones pictured!) is somehow connected with insensitivity to victims of Hurricane Katrina??!!???!???

Good lord! If you can't laugh about anything in life, life will ALWAYS be a tragedy for you. And THAT'S sad.

Jen and John - I love you guys. Keep being funny.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJoanna

Yesterday's post made me want to never, ever have any version (good or bad) of a king cake. Today's hasn't reversed that decision, because these are just awful.

I would like to find a good papty, though...

As my brother wrote elsewhere, Lazy Box Tops Rule!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

I was reading through the comments last night and LMAO. You guys, probably not so much, because I understand that you don't print ALL the comments people send you, just the inoffensive ones.

That said, I usually like the one earnest, cheerful commenter who tells me a little more about whatever we're talking about that day. (Everything I need to know in life I learned from Cakewrecks.) But they tell me stuff I didn't know before, like the scientific name of something, or where it's really located on a map. The geek in me just soaks it up. Comments that basically say, "No, it's not." don't count.

Hope you have a better day today.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Love your humor. Love love love it.

Thank you.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterloisgroat

Feeling a bit touchy after all of the "We're too uptight to think that this hilarious post is funny just because we are in some way shape or form associated New Orleans" comments are we? I can't say that I blame you! Awesome post!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Righteous post!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLinda J-H

Wait...this is a HUMOR blog? You were joking? Being sarcastic?

Great posts both days! Though all this talk about deep-fried giant donuts is making me hungry for one...even a wrecky one!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSusanD

Oh, gosh, you guys. Now we've got people complaining about HAVING TO READ THE COMMENTS. They're not only complaining about it, they are POSTING A COMMENT to complain about it. "I can't believe you made me read yesterday's comments to get the joke... I'm really hurt that I had to go to all that effort... this post is so bad..." Hell, I've never read the comments here before yesterday either, but rather than thinking it was the worst day ever and whining about the joke, I thought it was totally hilarious and worth the 30 seconds of my time.

Anyway, if you get any more morons like the one's you've been juggling, send 'em to Regretsy. We've got a pretty good handle on the trolls over there.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

And THIS is why Cake Wrecks is my happy place.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKati

Did you know that King Cakes were among the top rated searches on Bing yesterday? I credit Cake Wrecks. You live in infamy (in Epcot, in a bunker, eating fried King Cakes and occassionally doing the Kermit Flail)! I am descendant from the leprechauns, and as I swill my beer, eat my cinnamon covered coconut delights (ick), and munch on my ham and potatos - I personally vow to be offended by the cakes sure to come on Saint Paddy's Day - okay not at all, as being Irish has fortunately given me a SENSE OF HUMOR!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterteenceleb101

This bastard's keeping her mouth shut.

sprinkles.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi D

To Anonymous @ 12:54

Here in NYC, we've had a few Bush related catastrophes of our own, but I believe we have maintained a sense of humor regarding our baked goods. Mock our overpriced cupcakes, make faces at our black and white cookies, chuckle at our artisinal bread. I invite everyone to laugh at us.
C'mon, you know you want to.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmy's Mom

I love this blog even more today . . . didn't think that was possible. Jen and John, you bring such complete happiness every day.

I think that we are all so nervous by the horizontally striped mask cake is that the eye is most certainly the mark of Count Olaf.

wv: dilesses. Anything is dilesses if you deep fry it. Gonna go fire up my deep fryer and put some ooomph into my Shrove Tuesday pancakes.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdustilies

Did you ever know that you're my hero?

WV: arypelic - My god, yesterday's commenters (commentators, commentatorers, etc) went completely arypelic!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermin

@Anonymous 12:54

Deepfried traumacake.

WV: "noingraz"

A person who is too traumatized by King Cake to attend martis graz.

Secondary definition: A person who has offended the tradition of King Cake and has become a personaz non grataz at Mardis Graz.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJayKuz

Oh snap! I'm looking forward to my Pancake Day Papty tonight! Nothing deep fried tho... that would be inappropriate and highly improper.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wow. As a non-Cajun/Creole/Arcadian/French Canadian/regular Canadian/regular French/Louisianan or Louisiana-adjacent person, I don't feel qualified to comment on today's post. Let me just say that the "Papty" cake reminded me of the http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/09/party.html" rel="nofollow">"Parpy!" post on Hyperbole and a Half, which you should definitely go read, J&J(thoJ) -- you'll feel much better.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterabi

You guys ROCK!!! I love the snarky goodness! I only have one complaint today. I'm totally craving deep fried sugary confections now and I don't live anywhere NEAR Louisiana!!! What's a girl to do?

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterQueen Julian XIII

Wait... that was sarcasm Jen's been displaying? ... totally missed it... :)
Being deeply disappointed that King Cakes are NOT deep fried, I eschewed going to the local bakery and ate a bunch of homemade DEEP FRIED doughnuts instead. (no sprinkles)

I'm sure everyone at the office was wondering what those noises were today as I tried to smother my laughter so as not to disturb the clients. I'm sure it sounded like I was crying. Or having a seizure. Maybe the laughter would have been less creepy.

Yesterday's debacle and today's bitch slap has been appropriately e-mailed out to everyone I know.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPuppygirl

'Atta girl, Jen! What an excellent response. You be careful though, it's only one small step from a disrespectful post like this to a full on lampoon of the Eucharist! I think that was my favorite comment from yesterday. My goodness. Lots of panties in full-on "wadded" mode yesterday.

Hope there isn't a breeze from the northwest today in Orlando. I'm a bit concerned it may get a little smoky from the smoldering rage of a certain Southern state known for its unique mixture of French, Cajun, and Creole heritage (or it was something like that-- I can't really remember...)

Keep up the great work!

Also, Craig the commenter, you are hilarious.

--kate

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Good post!

Nice to see you getting to vent some steam. The internet is a dark scary place. Even the fun sights. Dark and scary.

Some blog readers act as if they're a captive audience and fail to realize if they don't like what you're saying they can close their web browser or just go on over to Politically Correct Jokes Daily for their daily fix of non-humorousness humor.

If you can't laugh at yourself who can you laugh at? Oh! Right! Other people. Especially the up tight ones.

Yes, up tight readers, we did just have a joke at your expensive. A good one, too.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAi

Oh and to commenters who still insist on keeping their panties in a bunch (really, just pick that wedgie, you'll feel better)...

Cultural pride does not mean being a cry baby. Or does it? On second thought, you might want to change out those bunchy panties for diapers.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAi

I actually just tried to hunt down some king cakes that might be worthy of a Sunday Sweets post. You know, just really stunning ones.

It uh, yeah.

It didn't go so very well.

However, http://foreignlanguagefun.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/King-Cake.jpg" rel="nofollow">this is pretty darn funny.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterewinbee

Bwahahahaaa!!!! Well played, Jen. Well played. :D

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMeg

(In wobbly old man voice):
"Beware the Groove!"

Ha ha. Love it.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRU

HEART!!

I'll be thinking of you while eating my Shrove Tuesdays pancakes tonight,which are not deep fried.. but perhaps should be...hmmmm....

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It is obvious that number 4 is a daisy.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJen B

love love love love you (& your krew) and everything y'all write.

Can you add a disclaimer at the top of each post that reads "This is a HUMOR BLOG. If you're not laughing, chuckling, chortling, snorting, grinning, or at least smiling, please depart the premises posthaste."?

We had a king cake here at work last year (ordered from a reputedly reputable king cake delivery company based in NOLA). It was not as yummy as I hoped, and it had a decidedly wreckish quality to it. It DID have a plastic baby inside, though we had to eat THE WHOLE THING, as the baby was cowering inside the very last piece. Not sure who decided it had to be eaten, since I thought we could just mush it up until we found the little guy. I do think it's not actually baked into the cake, since it would melt, but rather inserted into the baked cake after the fact and before the icing. Probably. But it doesn't really matter all that much to me.

I will say that it seemed like more of a bread than a cake.

Please keep doing what you're doing.. striking the occasional nerve just shows that you're doing it well. :)

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSylph

Are the orange and black sprinkles on the first cake suppose to be Marti Gras(s)?

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTravlnbard

Papty. Bwahahahahahahaha!

I feel sick from laughing so hard...

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterVanilla Cream

Is it bad that after yesterday's post and the nuclear fallout in the comments-that as soon as I checked my email today I laughed until I cried when " Taste of Casa"*not real name* sent me links to King Cake recipes?!?!?!? Jen-please continue your blog as it has always been-ignore the extremists-they will suffer ulcers from stress because they overreact to humor(and everything else).

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterrosenae2002

Touche! and I didn't think I could like your blogs anymore than I already do! You have officially become my heroes of snark!!!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly

Yes, Anonymous @ 12:54, I can see why you might be "touchy"; leaving an uneaten cake out in the Arizona sun to melt is surely something to be "touchy" about. And making fun of a poorly decorated cake is EXACTLY like making fun of Haiti....*rolls eyes*

Andrea

wv: tmaywe - "...we are gawwered togewer so Buwwercwup can tmaywe Pwince Humperdink..."

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Actually, that first one looks more like "Morti Gras" to me. My guess is that the cake is celebrating the way corpses swell after they die.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterkrillia

Holy Moses, some of those folks from yesterday need a sense of humor transplant. Threat Level Red, indeed.

Y'all just keep up the good work.

"[Kermit flail] AAAAAUUUUGGGHHH!!!"

Precisely!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commentergena

For some reason I found "Papty" to be extremely funny had to stop myself from laughing out loud at work and choking on my lunch. Thank you for the great humor you all provide on a daily basis, makes the day less monotonous.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbettybeth

I confess to having seen ads for deep-fried cupcakes at last August's Indiana State Fair. I did not actually see such a cupcake, and I don't remember having passed the vendor that was selling them--it was probably hidden behind one of the deep fried Twinkie booths--but I think that's pretty good evidence for their existance.

WV: actic What I said about yesterday's kerfluffle.

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterOldish Lady

Anon @ 1:59:

Thank you. I have a new blog happy place go to to! Regretsy is FANTASTIC! :)

-Melissa

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

OK, wait, you English-type folks! You DO fry your pancakes, right? (Just not deeply?) Otherwise, how do they cook? Baked in the oven?

And wait! Again! Are they crepes or pancakes? Big difference--crepes are little thin things you wrap yummy sweet things in, but pancakes are fluffy thicker things you pour sweet stuff over (and sometimes whipped cream if you're a restaurant).

Which ones are the pancakes made on Pancake Tuesday??

WV: manit, as in, "manit sure is crazy how incensed poeple get over their cakes."

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCloudy

Oh, now this is one of my favorite posts! I stand and applaud your snarkiness in the face of those who take cake too seriously!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterleannwoo

Well played =) I highly enjoy your ridulously funny website!

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJen W.

The best (worst!) thing about TODAY'S comments are those bastards from yesterday who have come BACK to once again defend their migraine-inducing "clarifications" in the comment section!!! AAARRRGGGGHHHH!!! STOP IT, STOP IT, STOP IT!!!!

*deep breaths*

Where's those hurricanes everyone is passing around?? I'll take two or three. :)

March 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChantelle

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