My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

A Cinderella Story

With all the royal wedding coverage out there, a lot of us girls have been spending this week imagining our own Princess Diaries moment.

Now, I don't know about you guys, but mine goes a little something... like this...

[harpsichord dream sequence music plays]

First, there's a whirlwind romance with the dashing stranger who looks like a cross between Nathan Fillion and Kiefer Sutherland during his Three Musketeers days.

(Awww yeeeeah.)

Next, we sink straight into the Fire Swamp.

No, no, just kidding.

Next we play BioShock together until 2AM.

Later, after dressing up as Venkman and Staypuft for Halloween (I'm Venkman, of course), and confessing our undying love for one another, there's a painfully romantic proposal:

Performed in an inflatable kiddie pool.

"Jen," my dashing prince would say, "Will you be my own Princess Peach?"

To which I would respond, "Are you kidding? Do Vulcans need the Pon Farr?
"(But we are going to Disney for the honeymoon, right?)"

And, BAM! I'm a princess! Next thing you know, I'm living in a castle...

"And over here is your TARDIS closet. As you can see, it is much, MUCH bigger on the inside."

...and wearing pretty princess crowns...

(Modeled after crabby Space Invaders, apparently.)

...and pretty princess dresses...

("Talk about your trunk space, check this action out!")

...and riding my Princess Vespa around...

(Ok, technically this would be a Princess Harley.)

...and...and...wait. You know what? Other than the castle and crown stuff, I've already got my fairy tale ending, complete with BioShock playing, Princess Bride quoting, brownie baking prince. (Love you, Sweetie.)

So I guess I'll just end here by wishing all of you:

I like the short and fluffy ones, myself.

Thanks to today's dream team Debbie B., Anony M., Lisa V., Lisa P., Julia B., Vanessa C., & Stephanie S., who, for the record, never even knew fairies *had* tails.

« Spot The Hidden Mickey | Main | A Royal Affair »

Reader Comments (77)

Tail lol!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commentertiny purple elephant

I'm pretty sure I would be set for life if I could get a TARDIS closet... especially if it comes with the tenth doctor/David Tennant...

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJustadreamer

Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder tooday. Mawage, that bwessed awangment, that dweam wifin a dweam...

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

Ok I lost it at the "trunk space" comment.. now everyone around thinks I"m batty

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEvelyn

Jen, glad your reality is better than a dream. Especially these dreams!

Congrats on combining Spaceballs and Roman Holiday references:

Every time I read a comment about what the big icky hoop skirt looked like, I thought "that person nailed it!" Until I saw the next comment.

How sad is it that it looks like it could be pasta, artichoke leaves, pancakes, tree fungus, lily pads, pea soup, and/or bologna?

wv - chrater

These cakes should be thrown into a deep chrater, because they are chrappy.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

Wait... I thought fairies had wings... (blinkblink)... I'm SO CONFUSED!!!!! (Running away screaming like a little girl).

WV: iciatede - the sheer creative genius of these wreckerators would have gone forever un-iciatede if it werent' for Jen and John's blog!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma!

Am I the only one who definitely sees the alien at the beginning of Men In Black in the "crown" cake?

I could ACTUALLY be a rendition of him.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNicole
Great post as always!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbabybearfightszombies

I don't know if you should admit you like tail that's short & fluffy...makes you sound like you molest small, furry animals...(RUN, THUMPER, RUN)

Princess Vespa, look at the trunk space and Staypuft (the name of my first cat & yes, I spelled it properly)

Does John have a brother who also bakes brownies, quotes Princess Bride and remodels homes beautifully? I'd be willing to rent by the hour if he's not free...

-Barbara Anne

P.S. Which Doctor would be in your TARDIS closet? ;)

April 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

What's a TARDIS closet?

April 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMissNay

Poor poor Belle. That gown/venus flytrap looking thing is eating her up lol. As for the others.. that last one was nice until the sad tail part lol. Ah well no one gets that fairy tale ending after all :(.

April 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Yes! I adore the subtle Aladdin reference!

April 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAdria

Also, oh God, that was supposed to be Belle? I had to go back for another look. Poor thing.

April 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAdria

Thought you might be interested in these pics of the Royal Wedding cake. The article includes an interview with the baker and an explanation on all the little details:

Hannah H

April 30, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterpartofthequeue2

Ooops! Wrong image in my previous comment.

Should have been:

Congrats on combining Spaceballs and Roman Holiday references:

April 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

Love all the awesome nerdy references in this post!

April 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterYoshimay

my mom loves it!!! more power!


April 30, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterd00dz

Tardis closet!!

April 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTriGirl

Even when I was a little kid, in my actual "princess diaries" days (a thousand years ago or who's counting anyways), my first order of business would have been to chow down cake - no matter what it looked like. Interestingly, by my kid perception, all of these cakes, (wrecks and non-wrecks alike) would have qualified as fit for a princess by my standards, and still are. I can't decide if that's good or bad.

April 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDJ Twisted Sister

I can die happy now. The cake wreck I sent you made the front page. I Am Sew Happay!

Debbie B.

May 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie Buckley

did you just say you wanted to ride Princess Vespa?

May 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think Belle's skirt is made out of Pringles.

May 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterladycrim

I suppose my mind is in the gutter, but I can't help but think that Fairytail belongs on the Playboy channel. Hahaha!

May 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I want a princess Harley! And a Tardis closet. With a swimming pool in it.

May 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

I agree with the Historian. Can we find a cake of Nathan Fillion?

May 11, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTia Dugan

Doctor Who FTW!!!!!!!

May 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJoyTwin

The last cake is actually very nice, except for the "fairytail." Maybe it's a cake for Gus and Jac, the mice from "Cinderella" (or rather, "Cinder-Relly")?

August 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDelia

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