My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Aw, Poo

Let this be a warning to anyone nicknamed "Peanut."

"Howdy ho!"

"Let's see...we've got a big pitted clump of chocolate icing, and lots of red gel leaking out the cracks. What else does this cake need?

"Oh! I know!"

"More roughage!"

(A pine tree counts, right?)

Suddenly, having my mouth washed out with soap doesn't sound like such a bad thing:

Giving new, literal meaning to a "sh*t-eating grin?"

(Btw, I made sounds I didn't think were humanly possible when I first saw this photo. Kind of a hairball-esque gargle. It was horrifying.)

Bakers, when making chocolate seashells for a wedding cake, here's something to keep in mind:

They *do* make white chocolate.

Bakers, when looking for a quick way to clean the chocolate sauce off your fingers, here's another thing to keep in mind:

Don't do this.

And finally: bakers, when attempting to entice your customers with a sweet chocolate treat, here's the last thing that should be on your mind:

Gnarly poop fingers.

Of dooooom.

Thanks to Ashley/Peanut, Megan E., Tracey S., Kate M., Fabiola I., & Chani, who actually have a band named "Gnarly Poop Fingers of DOOOOOOM." In my mind. Where it's AWESOME.

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  • Response
    Response: Jim C Cott JR
    Cake Wrecks - Home - Aw, Poo

Reader Comments (140)

mainecooncat: I was OK until the very last cake...then I snorted so loud my husband heard me in another room

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

that last one looks like intestines on a cake...eww

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

these cakes totally helped turn off my chocolate cravings. Thank You wreckers.

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm so glad that this post came on a Monday so that I could quickly ease my gag reflex by scrolling down to Sunday.

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCrystal

That last one is SO disgusting. They look like big, fat, nasty intestinal worms. Or just individual sections of an actual intestine.

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

second one: refried beans, ketchup, and some parsley.

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous


"Cake #2 looks to me like a tree sprouting from a heap of bloody stool."

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This crappiest Cake Wrecks EVER! I'm sure I'm not the first of the 107 to say this.

wv: matterso - How it looks doesn't really matterso pile on some more brown icing.

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGina

That last one is... there's just no excuse for anything that... ugly... gross... wormy... Seriously.

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnneke (Mudhooks)

I've lost my appetite. EWW

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJanelle

Sharyn @ 12p: You took my very thought on that last cake. A very loud, audible gasp followed by "Dear God, what is that thing?". I sincerely cannot understand what the baker had going through their head thinking that that cake would sell.

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSaraV

Ewwwwwwwwwww that last cake and the Sponge Bob cake are going to give me nightmares tonight. Why oh why don't they see that brown frosting usually turns into evil looking turds on cakes? Either the wreckerators are blind or think the customers are lol.

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

That last cake really got to me...Gag!

wv: Versh

Zees are dee versh cakes I have ever sheen...

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLeighanne

I have a title for the second one: "Murder in the Woods." It just kept ringing in my head while I stared, befuddled, at such a bizarre creation. I'm assuming that the cake was done via a request, otherwise the decorator might need a psych evaluation for homicidal ideation...

As for the poop fingers, all sorts of other horrible analogies come to mind, including that it looks like small, limp poop penises. If you look at them that way, you might start to actually feel sorry for them.

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterscrapadoo

Oh, yew .... That last cake reminded me of the tauntaun that Luke Skywalker crawled into to keep warm ... Urp.

Forerph - the noise my stomach made after those evil poop cakes.

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLucy

...I used to be a fan of Spongebob.
I can't ever look at him again without thinking of "s***-eating" grin.
And you know what's terrible? I have a big pile of chocolate looking morosely at me right now

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That last one is so horrifying. They don't remind me of poop fingers so much as pinky mice or maggots.

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnneJ

CARPOphagist? Whoops.
Made cake for coprophagists.
Smile. Who will notice?

wv: hypes

These photos gave me the hiiiiidey-ho hypes. Will wash behind my ears, kid.

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

I don't know how I managed to find Cake Wrecks, but I'm so glad I did...the video "Happy Falker Satherhood" reeled me in (and woke up my weekend guest to my laughing uncontrolablly), but the poo...the poo captured my heart! Thank you a thousand times, thank you!

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSarah Adrian

Thank you haikujoy for your haiku. Love the first one, especially how you spelled scatturd!

wv: braortio - after eating a bad braortio and helping Jen with this post, John had to take a nap on the couch with Lily as a but warmer.

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLCT

Usually when I see gross looking cakes on this site, I tell myself, "It's just frosting. I could still eat it." But not this time! I could never even touch one of those poop fingers of doom.

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The poo smear cake looks like a toilet after a little boy has gone poo. I think you might be able to figure out why I know that...

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDaya

EEEK! these are some of the worst things yet, all the poo chocolate is making me sick.

Now I won't have to worry about lunch, I've lost my appetite, so thank you.

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDawn Marie

Spot the Eddie Izzard quote! :)

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterElly

The gnarly fingers kinda scared me a little!! The rest made me gag!!! Ewwww!!!!!

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermommydearest

OMG that last one looked more like large worms or intestines than poop! I think I lost any appetite I had for the year!

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Since I'm interested in losing weight, Jen, I seriously thought about printing out a copy of a pic of that last cake and posting it on my fridge. I lost my appetite and began feeling a bit nauseous when that hideous pic came into view, so it would definitely keep me from raiding the fridge. However I don't think my husband would appreciate a pic of a cake covered in frosting depicting raw sheep intestines constantly in his direct line of sight. I've seen bugly cakes a plenty here, but THAT ONE literally takes the cake!

July 19, 2011 | Unregistered Commentercrownring

All I can say is that SpongeBob is mostly face. He has very little room for innards, so that smile must be his intestines.

wv. Plarygoo -- Or that smile could just be plarygoo

July 21, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMeghan Smith

my reaction to the last one: MY EYESSSSS!!!!

July 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterClara J.

"NO you IDIOTS! I said the customer wanted a SHEET cake! A SHEET CAKE! What about that did you NOT understand?!"

July 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBobbyFett84

Those aren't fingers. They're the awful worm things from the movie Tremors! ::shudder::

July 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMads

See the condensation forming in the bubble on the second photo? It's getting ready to rain in there. What you've got there is a poo-cake ecosphere!

July 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNYCLOAMR

The picture made me ill, the band name made me LAUGH OUT LOUD!!!! DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTrudy

Ugh! That last one seriously made me nauseous! Yuck, yuck, yuck!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmber

I took five minutes to read all the comments. I didn't stop laughing once. I am SO going to recreate the gnarly poop fingers of dooooom for my brother's birthday... it would be so much better than my mum who gave her brother a 'Stinking corpse lily' for his birthday (the dog ate it).

August 11, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLucy

Sponge Bob with poop mouth - incredible.

September 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commenteranna @ HaHas for HooHas

WOW! There's NOTHING like a white cake with SKID MARKS....maybe we should be grateful!!!

November 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterVictoria

I was enjoying some roasted red pepper hummus until I saw this...

December 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCourtney

I have never been so close to throwing up as I was after seeing these cakes and I've been back reading every post since the beginning for months now! These are the worst! I'm going to feel sick every time I see Spongebob and I used to love him!

January 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTeresa

Pretty sure the last one might've been a poop cake. But at least the ones we sell actually look like poo because they use candy corn, plastic flies, and wadded up pieces of tissue paper.

April 12, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterdez

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