My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

It's Hatching Men

Well, here's something you don't see every day:

[adjusting spectacles and consulting clipboard] Here we have two neanderthal males with questionable chest hair hatching from watery eggs. As you can see, the one on the right has acclimated to the process, while the one on the left is all "AAAAAUUUGGHH!!"

Which is a paraphrase, of course, since in Neanderthal it'd actually be more like "OokalockahoohooGROOOOOOONK!"

Now when I first saw that picture, I figured some lone baker somewhere had gone off the deep end. Which doesn't seem an unreasonable hypothesis when you look at that icing armpit hair.

Then I saw this next one:

So the neanderthal has evolved into a suave grey fox with well-groomed armpit hair and an outie belly button that will give mothers everywhere a coronary, but the question remains:

Why are bakeries making cakes of men hatching out of watery eggs?

Anyone know? Or will this turn into another lamb cakes smoking cigarettes mystery?


Thanks to Kathleen C. for the egg-cellent wreckporting.

« Wreck A "Bye," Baby | Main | Antique Mystique »

Reader Comments (134)

Could it be a throw back from "Castaway"???

January 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTerri G

In the full size image, you will see that Mr Suave has a cocktail shrimp ..uh .. down there. You have no idea how difficult it was to say that without using the words enlarge, expand, blow up.

January 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergobbler

Its quite obviously jesus coming out of an easter egg. I mean, its almost almost valentines day, so natch, we're bringing out the easter decorations.

January 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterChelsea

My question is "Who buys these cakes?'' ????

January 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoanie

Egg fertilizing. Doing it wrong.

January 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermsyendor

Oh my goodness WHY.

First thought: those are very manly muppets! With very manly pit hair.
Second thought: PLEASE tell me that's supposed to be a belly button.
Remaining thoughts: WHYYYYYY

January 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGrace @ What Grace Cooked

The first thing I thought of was Castor and Pollux!

January 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterharley

What I'm wondering is were these made by request or did they just make those and put them in the display case hoping someone would buy them.

January 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRanger


January 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterC

whatever they are, I hope I never see another cake with icing armpit hair. That little three word phrase is going to haunt me forever.

January 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentersuzeckis

My eyes! My eyes!
Oh crap, now I have that lovely image seared in my memory. I'm scarred!

There are some images that are better left unseen. There are some mysteries that are better left unsolved. I just. don't. want. to. know. why. anyone. would. make. this. cake. not. once. but. three. count them. three. times.

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered Commentersan

My theory is Cookie monster laid some eggs after a very unusual evening with Snuffalupagus lol can't spell that but heck what else could this be??? Yes human men came from the eggs but who knows what Cookie Monster is anyways lol. Then again..who knows if those are human. Thanks wreckerators for destroying my poor mind.

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

It's not Super Bowl Sunday yet, but the boss says I have to utilize the football pan somehow. He gave me a photo of him at last year's Easter party as reference. No, he didn't tell me why he was naked and sitting in a bowl of blue jello.

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDi

My gut instinct is that these are easter cakes and that's Jesus hatching out of an egg . . .

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMeridae

Just use your outie
or underarms as eggtooth.
Albumen morning.

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

I got "special" cookies for a bachelorette party once, could these be on that theme?

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMegan

I'm going with the Eastern Orthodox Epiphany/Baptism of Christ theory--like the Polar Bear Plunge, only instead of for charity, you're doing it for God. and

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

I took one look at the first picture and cracked up. (pun not intended, but appropriate). :) I am now very interested in why there is more than one cake of dudes hatching from blue eggs, or whatever this turns out to be. The facial expression on the second cake is priceless.

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

Not sure if this is right, but the second picture reminds me of that character Bob from Fox's Bob's Burgers cartoon that I believe is already off the air.

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterusername

These are Lady Gaga fanboys. As for the brobdingnagian "outies," well... they were born that way.

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTA

Is it me or does that last man egg cake look like Ron Jeremy? If so, it's a good thing that there's an egg covering him!

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRobbi/Sugarrrsmack

Hellbound Alleee and others had it right. This is definitely PanGu and it would make sense to see these for sale around the Chinese New Year. Google Image Search Pangu, and also read this paragraph about the Chinese legend of PanGu:

January 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarrietastic

"Unfortunately, for the male painting he decided to change the name from "Venus" to something very similar, but reflective of the gender of the male subject. This aroused the ire of the Church at the time, and the male painting was destroyed. "

I didn't see that last sentence and searched Google images... I do not recommend this.

January 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBumblebee

I agree, with Pan Ku idea--especially since it is Chinese New Years

January 27, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterdrkala

It's not surprising they did a poor job of depicting Pangu; Think of all the cakes that are supposed to be Santa, snowmen, or Scooby Doo! The guy is probably bald with no body hair and is in a red egg.

January 28, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnn

I'm going for polar bear plunge. Sort of like this one:

February 1, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRobin

Late to the party, but wondering if I am the unintentional author of these mystery hatching mer-Christs.
Over ten years ago I was asked to design the cover for our church's weekly program, specifically the Easter one. My idea was Christ emerge\ing from a white lily, not a blue lotus or cabbage, and DEFINITELY only down to the waist. Could this be a recreation of a memory of my picture?
If one of these turns up with rabbits blowing trumpets or poinsetta butterflies then I'll know.
It would help if we knew where the cakes were made.

February 2, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPandaRosa

Conversation I just had with my mom:

Mom: Do you want me to make you some rice?
Me: I WANT THIS CAKE. *points to hatching men*
Mom: *stares at screen for a good two minutes* ........ I don't. *slowly backs away*

Thank you, Cake Wrecks, for breaking my poor mother. xD

February 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterThe Jen

Am I the only one that thought someone was trying to marry the story of Jesus with Easter eggs? And failing miserably, I might add, but that was the first explanation I had.

February 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

goo goo g'joob!!!!

(no matching walrus cakes???)

February 11, 2012 | Unregistered Commenternanciejeanne

There went my Lunch...

February 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterdiehardTREKKIE

Raining men. Bachelorette party cakes. Bad ones.

February 18, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBebe

I think it's based on a Salvador Dahli painting. I can't remember the name, but it depicted a man hatching from an egg that looks like the earth...... in the place where bad people go...... with two naked demons looking on in repulsed fascination.

April 11, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterR.S. Kidd

clearly it's Jesus hatching from an Easter egg

November 28, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie

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