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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Apr122012

Castle Came-A-Lot

Making a castle cake?

Then here's a tip (or seven):

Photo removed at the baker's request.  Please enjoy this lovely picture of Epcot.

Always use protection.

As you can see, King Richard erected a castle here so safe it's absolutely guaranteed that nothing comes in OR out, no matter how hard the wind blows.

 

ACTUAL CONVERSATION I JUST HAD WITH JOHN:

John: "Uh, Jen, it was King Arthur, not King Richard."

Me: [deadpan stare]

John: "Oh! Ahahahaa! Ok, I like where your head's at."

Me: "Tell it to King Richard, dude."

 

A seven turret salute to Sarah for finding a cake where the rubber meets the moat. 

Wednesday
Apr112012

Pan-Tastic!

*peppy infomercial music*

[yelling in a high-pitched monotone]

HI JOHNNY YATES HERE FOR THE ORIGINAL PAN-TASTIC ALL-IN-ONE CAKE PAN. THE FASTEST, EASIEST, SAFEST WAY TO BAKE AND DECORATE ANY CAKE YOU CAN IMAGINE... GUARANTEED! JUST LOOK AT THESE RESULTS:

AMAZING!

 

NO MORE DECORATING DISASTERS WITH THE PAN-WOW.

*WAH...waaaah*

[yelling louder]

THE UNIQUE DESIGN OF THE PAN-TASTIC LETS YOU TURN ANY CAKE INTO A WORK OF ART!

YOU'LL NEVER HAVE TO THINK ABOUT CAKE DESIGN AGAIN!

 

Attractive, Well-Dressed Woman: "But how does it work?"

SIMPLE!  JUST POUR, BAKE, AND DECORATE!

IT'S THAT EASY!

 

Slightly Confused, Attractive, Well-Dressed Woman: "But can I use it for the Fourth of July?"

[screaming]

ABSOLUTELY!

THE PAN-TASTIC WORKS FOR ANY OCCASION!

 

EVEN PEOPLE WHO ARE ALL THUMBS CAN DO IT!

Pouty, Slightly Less Attractive But Still Well-Dressed Woman: "But my husband is left- handed!"

NO PROBLEM! THE PAN-TASTIC IS AMBIDEXTROUS!

FATHER'S DAY WILL NEVER BE THE SAME!

 

Wide-eyed Woman In A Sweater Vest: "And what about my mom, the proctologist?"

WE'VE GOT HER COVERED, TOO! IN BRIGHT PINK LATEX!

GIVE HER THE FINGER WITH PAN-TASTIC!

 

REMEMBER, DON'T SETTLE FOR IMITATORS!

GET THE ORIGINAL AND GET MORE BUNNY FOR YOUR MONEY WITH PAN-TASTIC!

THE CAKE SENSATION THAT'S SWEEPING THE NATION!

 

AND IF YOU ORDER NOW, WE'LL THROW IN THE CAKE-MAGIC ALL-PURPOSE HELMET PAN... ABSOLUTELY FREE!

THAT'S A 600 DOLLAR VALUE! YOURS FOR THE LOW, LOW PRICE OF $19.99!

ORDER NOW!

 

Thanks to Grahm, Stephanie L., Stephanie, Erin M., Matilda, Scott A., Celeste B., and Sweet for the hand-outs.