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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Dec072010

A Little Too Much Ginger, Perhaps

Some people collect stamps, or art cards, or limited edition laser-etched Animaniac propeller beanies*.

I collect photos of ridiculously decorated gingerbread men.

* Actually I'm just hoping this is true, because I'd love to see one.

I started when I realized a lot of bakeries sell gingerbread cookies year-round, and so try to decorate them to go with all the different holidays. Which gets, shall we say, a little silly:

Get me an old priest and a young priest...

Oh, and a glass of milk.


I'd look alarmed, too, if someone stole my torso and left my bloody limbs scattered around. [shudder]

And a personal favorite:

The guy on the right looks like he just had an alien chest-burster episode, only with a giant leprechaun.

Which, you must admit, is kind of awesome.

No, Mr. Scary Clown Man, actually, I do *not* want your sprinkles. Thank you.

BRING ME THE HEAD OF STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE!!

Then be a dear and glue it to a cookie, won't you?


Purrrrfect.

'Course, the best designs are usually the ones that ignore the "man" shape altogether:

Not exactly what I had in mind when I asked for "Catwoman."

Ok, this is getting ridiculous.

Really ridiculous.



No, really REALLY ridiculous.

Death by poodle.

(Also, $2.19 for that? Really?)

Not sure what these blue things are, but boy are they appetizing!


Bwhahahahaa!

Just kidding.

Still, I ask you: what's wrong with the time-honored, classic gingerbread man design?

[snicker]

Actually, this one is pretty awesome, too.

But this - THIS - on the other hand:

This must be stopped.

Think of the hippos.

L.G., Jas D., Ginger G. (yes, really. Heheh.), Leah O., Sean R., Lauren A., Kim, John D., M.L.W., & Eyal, thanks for contributing to my collection! Now I just need a Valentines' one. (Hint hint.)

Monday
Dec062010

BREAKING NEWS

 

Michael Jackson is DEAD!!!!!

But he still somehow managed to release a new album this month called "Michael." Great. I'm a fully functioning human being that can't even remember to take out the trash, and this guy put out an album after being dead for a year and a half. (Does that make him a "working stiff"? Rim shot.) Anywhoozle, no better time than now to take a look back at some MJ classics.

 

 

This wreckorator was a smooth criminal to send this pretty young thing out the door:

 

Because "Triller" and "birthday night" go together like thumbless hand in glittery glove.


Remember the time...

...that Michael dressed up as Uncle Sam for the Thriller album cover? Neither do I. In fact I think the album originally looked something like this:

 

 

Note: I said, "something like this." Sans weird neck growth. On the bright side, they got the hand down the pants right. (Insert "Beat It" reference here.)

 

Ooooh, MJ cookie cakes. The way you make me feel is just....

 

...sad. And hungry. Mostly hungry. Kinda sad.


And this black and white cookie looks more like an ad for Soul Glo.

 

 


but it's nothing compared to this off the wall version of the King of Pop:

 

Yes, that's Michael Jackson, Armenian style. And it's bad. It's dangerous. It's dirty Diana.


Becca973, Mischa P., Jennifer D., Kimberly, Lila S., Felicity P., Shannon B., if you want to scream about all the MJ songs, you are not alone. But, I won't stop till I get enough. After all, it's human nature to like the man in the mirror... cause it's thriller... I like the Jackson 5. I'm out.