Giving A Whole New Meaning To "Stiff Drink"

Happy Alcohol Screening Day, minions!

Now.

::adjusting hypothetical glasses that I *could* be wearing; YOU DON'T KNOW::

Let's begin.

What would you say is your greatest weakness?

Mm-hm, mm-hmmmm. I see.

Are you especially detail-oriented? Or do you focus on the bigger picture?

Yikes, get a hold of yourself, mate! YOU CAN HANDLE THIS.

Moving on...

When do you find you work best?

Yeah. Kinda figured.

Would you say you're generally happy with where you are in life?

Cool.
Cool cool cool.

::scribbling furiously on notepad without breaking eye contact::

Do you ever find yourself getting, how should I put this... "salty?"

Oh, no reason... just... curious.

Where do you see yourself in the next 5 years?

[....]

Well I appreciate your honesty.

And finally, when things get hard, are you able to take a firm hand? Can you suck it up and get the job done?

Ohh, ballsy answer.

I like it.

Well, I've just now decided we're moving in a completely different direction, but thanks for coming in!

And thanks to Erica, Missy N., Telch, Anna R., Christy H., Justin J., & Danielle M. for giving a whole new meaning to "stiff drink."

Heyooooo.

*****

Do you shop Amazon? Then how about clicking through my affiliate link to shop? USA, UK, Canada.

 Visiting Amazon through those links will help support the site, and costs you nothing. Thanks, guys!

And from my other blog, Epbot:

And Now, A Demon Dog For A Five-Year-Old

Iiiiit's Hump Day, minions!

Isn't that great news, "Demon Dog For A Five-Year-Old?"

::gutteral snarling::

Aw, I guess he can't hear me over all the screaming.

Actually, looks like it's been a pretty rough week all 'round for 5-year-old girls:

Can YOU say, "creepy anatomical inaccuracies?"

No?

'Cuz I'd like demon dog back, please. [shudder]

***

If I told you someone ordered "Congratulations Cub Scouts, Pack 47" on a cake, which of those words do you think most likely to be misspelled?

AHA!
You guessed wrong.
(I'm guessing.)

It is, in fact, every word except that one:

"Club Scott Pac 47."

[salutes]

*****

Two wrongs may not make a right, but two rights DEFINITELY make this wrong:

[give it a second]

You'll gladly foot the bill for that one, though, after I show you this:

SOMEONE CALL DEMON DOG!

Thanks to Donne G., Leah S., Maura M., Anony M., & Diana M. for the womb with a view.

*****

Do you shop Amazon? Then how about clicking through my affiliate link to shop? USA, UK, Canada.

 Visiting Amazon through those links will help support the site, and costs you nothing. Thanks, guys!

And from my other blog, Epbot: