Spring Me

Tomorrow is the first day of Spring, minions, so forget the forecast, throw on some flip-flops, and break out the finger flowers!

AW YEAH FINGER FLOWERS.

(At least it beats a knuckle sandwich? Yes? No? Shall I show myself out?)

Yep, there's nothing like Spring flowers, with all their bountiful riots of color:

...and cheer:

...and color:

...and unintentional wangs:

Those are some flowers with serious... stamen-a.

(Pollination humor HEYOOOO.)

So whether you're currently freezing your daisy dukes off or cranking the A/C like a pansy, here's wishing you a very:

I think it's Dutch.

Thanks to Amy H., Heather B., Sara S., Mica, Ashley F., & Steven V. for putting the "zing" back in "Speinz." Or something. I dunno. Look, it's Friday. You're lucky I'm even HERE today.

*****

In honor of Spring allow me to present the product reviewers are calling "the best thing I’ve ever bought after 40 hours without sleep."

A shower curtain of Jeff Goldblum casually lounging with a gorilla.

This thing has hundreds of 5-star ratings, and I'm gonna be honest here, the fact that so many people have this hanging in their bathrooms really renews my faith in humanity.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

My apologies. EXPLOSIONS AND/OR ALIENS.

And they say cake decorating is dead:

It's not dead.

It's more in the process of being slowly bludgeoned to death.

Ergo the massive head injury and general fuglitude happening here.

Now let's take a rare glimpse at the Cake Wrecks Facebook Wall - because, oh yes, we're one of those ancient dinosaur sites that still has a Facebook page:

You're absolutely in the right here, Kim... but I like the way your friend thinks.

And here's one from Audrey, who used her cake to convey both an apology AND an explanation:

(Is that "poor" or "poop"? Because either works for me.)

I like it. Sweet and succinct. Maybe we should all give this technique a try.

"Sorry about the house. NETFLIX."

"Forgive the smell. TACO TUESDAY."

Or, for a one-size-fits-all approach:

"My apologies. EXPLOSIONS AND/OR ALIENS."

***

Alexandria wanted a really basic beach scene for her son's birthday cake, so she ordered this design from the book and asked the bakery to leave off the characters and flowers:

To recap: she just wanted the water and sand. That's it. (She planned to add some toy sharks later at home.)

Here's what her bakery made:

BEACH PLEASE.

Thanks to Ken K., Katie R., Kim, Audrey O., & Alexandria C. for teaching us the ocean is more of a stream, and the beach really is #1.

*****

Because some days call for more than coffee:

"Probably Whiskey" Enamel "Coffee" Mug

(The listing really does have "coffee" in quotation marks, ha!)

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: