We Are The World Wrecks

As you've probably guessed by now, most of the wrecks on this site are made right here in the good ol' US of A. Which may be a sad point of pride, but we'll take it. (America! Heck yeah!!)

Still, in an effort to give our American bakers a much-needed shot of schadenfreude, we've decided to search through 16,000 submissions to find a few wrecks from other countries.

"But Jen," you're thinking, "isn't that kind of like William Shatner picking on Andrea Boccelli for singing a single note slightly off-key one time while he had a cold?"

Yeah, kind of.

Are we going to do it anyway?

Heck yeah!!

From Denmark:

I'm not sure if these are actually cakes or just giant Danishes, but whichever it is, keep in mind that someone thought the green icing was helping.

From Egypt:

You might think camouflage triangles, shooting stars, and neon splattered rings would be a little crazy, but that white pom pom thing really pulls it all together.

From Taiwan:

I don't know what it is, but I think it wants to kill me.

From Morocco:

Is that...Doc? From Snow White? Hey, I think it's Doc!

No, wait. The little trees are all knocked over.
Must be Sneezy.

From Iran:

That's either a fish or a rubber chicken. Final answer.

Courtesy of the Ivory Coast, here's one way to cover up messy handwriting:

Inadequately.

From our friends over in China:

Say, is your tank dripping, or are you just happy to see me?

And finally, from Mexico:

I will now yell at a Mexican cake in a bad Scottish accent.

"Heed! Down in front!
"Would you look at the size of that girl's head? That's a 'uge noggin'! It's a virtual planetoid! It has its own weather system!"

Thanks to Stephanie B., Heather B., Alisa K., Cindy P., Lisa, Amanda D., Jacquie B., & Clau for that veritable tapestry of nations. A world showcase, if you will, providing illuminations for our own American Adventure.

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P.S. In the spirit of continued learning and broadening our horizons, I found you some take-home reading:

What If? Serious Scientific Answers To Absurd Hypothetical Questions

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

Parental Payback

Parents, when it comes to planning your child's birthday party, prepare for a lot of whining, temper tantrums, and willful brattiness.

Plus your kids might be a pain, too.

Well, here's one way to exact a little revenge: your kids' birthday cake.

Can't sleep. Barney will eat me.

Yep, there's something about seeing their favorite lovable character transformed into a homicidal psychopath that could slightly unhinge more impressionable minds.

"To infinity! and killkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkill."

Hey, whatever doesn't make your children soil themselves in panic-stricken terror only makes them stronger, right?

"Now, don't worry, kids; Elmo's more afraid of you than you are of him!

"Billy, would you like to do the honors? Let's start with a good clean stab through Elmo's eye. Go on.

"Oh, quit crying. Birthday boys *like* eating Muppet eyes! And just look at that face! Elmo wants you to eat him!"

Ok, granted, you'll be the one paying for their therapy sessions later, but in the meantime...

Spongebob No Pants is here to say hello, kids!

Besides, sometimes there are added benefits:

I'm pretty sure your daughter will never ask for a pony again.

Thanks to wreckporters Laurie H., Stephanie L., Kevin H., Fraulein M., & Jennifer S., who think I should totally write parenting books. (Working title: Odds Are, They'll Live.)

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Silly Jokes For Kids: The Best Jokes, Riddles, Tongue Twisters, Knock-Knock jokes, and One liners for kids

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And from my other blog, Epbot: