Beautiful Wrecks

YOU GUYS. We have another special VIDEO post today!

Or, if your work computer won't let you view video, keep scrolling for the written version.

 

Every cake is so wonderful,
And suddenly...

it's hard to breathe.

 

Now and then, I get insecure
From all the pain...

(Ow.)

 

I'm so ashamed.

I am beautiful,

 

No matter what they say.

Words can't bring me down.

 

I am beautiful in every single way.
Yes, words can't bring me down, oh no.

So don't you bring me down today.

 

To all your friends, you're delirious.
Ice cream cones... to make their horns...

Tryin' hard to make some sense of it. Wait, are those bugles?
Is it a cow-duck with horns and a goatee?

 

Cause you are beautiful, no matter what they say.
Words can't bring you down.

You are beautiful in every single way.
Words can't bring you down. NoOooOoooOOOooo....
So don't you bring me down today.

 

No matter what we poo.

No matter what we bake.

And everywhere we go,
The suananaaaIIOOOAAAAa NNOOOO NOO NOOooooOO ooooooooo

 

We are beautiful, no matter what they pay.
Camo flower town.

NoooooooOoo.

 

We are beautiful in every single way.
Words can't bring us down. No no no no no mmmm MMMM mm....

So don't you bring me down today.

OooooOOOOUgggnhh... MMmmmnOOOooAAH!
Don't you bring me downtooaaaaayyyyyyyyaAAAAAHHHHH

AAAOooooOOhh...

So don't you bring me down..... ughhnnnn....

Today.

 

Zakes C., Maja, Liz D., Lesley M., DaAn D., Caroline M., Haley H., Geri B., Rachel S., Bob B., Sue S., & Amy B., awoooawoooeeeeoaaaahhhhow. No matter what they say.

Note from john: If you're wondering who's singing in the video, it's our friend Jennifer Dorsman. And yes, she really is that good. Makes you sick, doesn't it?

*****

P.S. Speaking of beauty, I've been slathering snail slime cream on my face for about two weeks now, and so far the best part is telling people about it. :D

Advanced Snail All-In-One Cream

I caved when my friend Lisa kept raving about this brand, plus it has over 7,000 5-star ratings on Amazon. They don't hurt the snails to make it, and the cream isn't TOO slimey, so for $20 it's a fun, kooky thing to try. Plus, c'mon, then you get to tell people you use snail cream... ON YOUR FACE. Best party intro evah.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

Sunday Sweets Special Feature: The "Mirror Cakes" of Olga Noskova

The shiny "mirror cakes" of Olga Noskova have been going viral the past few weeks, and today I am jumping on that shiny, shiny bandwagon, you guys, because LOOKIE:

When I first saw this cake my jaw literally dropped. And that's coming from someone whose JOB is to look at the world's most beautiful cakes.

 

I thought I'd seen it all.

I WAS WRONG.

 

Check out this marbling:

 

And this funky-cool fluting:

 

Incredibly, Noskova's cakes even look as beautiful inside as they do out:

 

So how does she do it?

Here's a short video from Noskova's brand new Youtube channel to illustrate:

The "mirror glaze" is a poured on gelatin mixture, and is apparently an old French technique that just isn't used very often. (Although I bet it's about to get a LOT more popular. Ha!)

 

And while everyone is focusing on that incredible shine, it turns out Nokova has perfected another incredible cake texture:

 

A velvety matte speckle, which she achieves with a powered sprayer.

 

Both of her signature textures together:

 

This is cake art in every sense of the word, but as John pointed out to me, it's cake art that you still want to eat. Somehow Noskova has managed to make her cakes look as delicious as they are beautiful - and we all know that's no small task in the modern cake world.

Head over to Olga's Instagram for sooo much more (it wasn't easy to narrow down my favs!), and then watch her new Youtube channel for hopefully more instructional vids to come.

 

Happy Sunday, everyone!

*****

P.S. Need a cool gift for the person who has everything? Then how about a card that transforms into a bouquet:

Fresh Cut Paper Pop-Up Flowers

I sent this one to my Mom for her birthday last month, and it looks just like this! Even better, it ships free with Prime, so no extra postage needed.

Or you could stock up with the three-pack!

There are more flower styles and colors at the link.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: