The Sign Post

Better watch out for this bakery, henchpersons:

I hear they'll hang you out to dry.

"TELL US HoW WE ARE DOing.."

"An O you co-A WIN... " uh, some assorted scribbles.

Hey, uh, guys?

YOU'RE ON CAKE WRECKS.

What's that tell you?

Now, tell me what the mystery blob with the vaguely butterfly-like thing on it is supposed to be, and we'll call it even.

The bakers wielding the pastry bags aren't the only culprits, though:

I've seen a lot of these cakes. They live up to their name.

Aw, now why is "home made" in quotes? From that gooey ooze dripping out the bottom I can tell it's JUST like "home made." (Love you, Mom!)

*sigh*

Personally I don't see how you can use a "thank you," no matter WHICH underwear it might belong to.

(Give it a minute.)

(Theeere it is.)

Hey, Melissa P., Jennifer D., April G., Dani, Kelsey H., & Claire M., there's your sign.

*****

P.S. Speaking of underwear, here's a shout-out to my favorite wire-free bra, which I just bought four more of this month:

Warner's Easy Does It Seamless Wireless Bra

I love the under-arm smoothing panel - no dig or pinch! - and like most Warners, these are incredibly comfortable. I watch the listing and usually buy any color that goes under $20, and as of this writing "Rosewater" is only $10.50 in my size, woot! Definitely click over and check all the colors in your size. (I'm a 34DDD and wear a Large, if that helps.)

Oh, and be sure to check the image gallery for a better idea of how they look on larger tracts of land.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

Cake After People

What would happen if every baker on earth...[dramatic voice]...disappeared?

This isn't the story of how they might vanish. It's what happens to the cakes they leave behind. This is just part of the journey that will take us to the future of once active bakeries, as well as haunting sites already devoid of taste. Welcome to earth, population: zero.

1 year

after bakers

An abandoned ring and silk flowers bear mute witness to the echoing loneliness...of desolation.

10 years

after bakers

In the depths of bakery windows everywhere, dust gathers. Icing crumbles. With no workers here to clean, once-sweet treats become deadly harbingers of disease.

Sun-bleached displays now resemble so much worn, waxy marble, making it impossible to distinguish what once was a timeless tasty treat.

Uh. Lot of alliteration in this half of the script, huh?

Sound guy: Alliter what now? 

Never mind.

100 years

after bakers

Geothermal flash floods bring with them river rock and debris. Amazingly, the petrified pastries persevere.

Seriously? "Petrified pastries persevere?" Who wrote this?

sound guy: I think it was the new guy; he had to finish up when Jerry took leave. Look, just go with it; we're on a roll.

[sigh] Fine.

In dank, darkened displays, filthy, festering folds of fondant mask the moldering malformed mess, made more malignantly misshapen in much...

[throwing script down] Oh come on!!

sound guy: What?

I'm ad-libbing from here. Deal with it.

sound guy: Ok, but you're telling Jerry.

Fine. Let's wrap this up.

10,000 years

after bakers

Yeeeeee-haw!

Come and get it!!

sound guy: Seriously?

Seriously.

Hey Carly T., Tom H., & Clair W., did you know that all these displays are for bakeries still open for business? Seriously.

*****

P.S. Presenting my all-time favorite Christmas tee, and heck yes I've already been wearing it for the last 3 weeks:

Tree Rex T-Shirt

The graphic is bright and cheery, it's super soft, and only costs $14! More colors and cuts for Men and Kids at the link.

******

And from my other blog, Epbot: