Sunday Sweets Makes Sure You Eat Your Greens

So, are you making ALL the healthy New Year's Resolutions today? Hmmm?

Oof, same here.

Not to worry, though, because I'm about to help you out BIG TIME. Here come 10 Unexpectedly Delicious Healthy Meals for 2023.

First up, a hearty Caesar Salad:

(By Coco's Cupcakes in London)

... which is actually cake.

(TOLD YOU THEY WERE UNEXPECTED.)

Yes, even the bowl is cake! The lettuce is edible wafer paper - but if you're like me and don't believe that (WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?), then check out this Youtube tutorial showing you how to make your own.

For those of you pointing out that Caesar dressing is hardly diet food, that's an excellent point. Maybe we should eat the romaine raw instead:

(By How To Cake That, online only)

::knowing grin::

Now, before you say anything, YES I HAVE PROOF IT'S CAKE:

Booya.

Oh, and the clear plastic? Edible gelatin sheets.

Maybe you'd like something even closer to nature, though:

(By Sweet Illusions in Australia)

Mmm, dirt. Oh, and vegetables.

Or you know what they say about apples:

(By Torta Decor in Hungary - who has a video tutorial for the apples here!)

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away... but cake apples taste way better."

::nodding sagely:: Those hedgehogs know what's up, y'all.

You know what's amazing about all this asparagus?

(By Coco's Cupcakes in London)

I mean, besides the fact that it's all cake?

No weird smells later. You know what I'm talking about.

(John's giving me a Look. We better move on.)

I'm proud to say I would eat all of these vegetables:

(By Ira Torte in Croatia)

Yep, I'm just a health nut that way. (And if anyone asks, I'm chewing on the wood crate for fiber.)

I know we've covered salads pretty thoroughly, but hang on, just one more:

(By The Sweet Life Cakes & Cookies By Julie in Michigan)

How cute is this: She added the birth date & birth weight to the packaging! So clever!

And again, I have the photo you'll need to win some arguments later:

This breaks my brain in the best possible way.

Right, that's enough salads. Who wants a nice healthy steak?

(By Bubolinkata Cakes in Bulgaria)

WELL TOUGH. You get cake instead. (Even the knife!)

The painting on those tomato slices is blowing my mind, by the way. And the lemon! And the corn!

I'm more of a soup person, to be honest, so this bowl of Pho deliciousness is calling my name...

(By Sweet Nom Bakery in Canada)

Once again, even the bowl is cake - but my brain is flat-out refusing to accept that the shredded meat and cilantro are made of sugar. How. HOW??

Well gang, I hope I've helped your New Year's Resolutions along - if only by showing you that things could always be worse. I mean, you could be eating cake for every meal.

Mmm, cake for every meal.

Caaake for every meeeeal.

I'm sorry, where were we?

Oh! Right! I was going to show you the craziest thing I found last week while researching for this post. It's so insane I decided I had to share, so... enjoy:

(By About Cake in the UK)

Tell me that's not the coolest pineapple skull cake you've ever seen. TELL ME.

Oh, and happy Sunday! Whatever your resolutions, here's hoping 2023 treats you extra sweet.

Resolution Delusions

2022 is winding down, my friends, so it's time to start brainstorming all the resolutions we're going to commit to, post proudly on Facebook, and then quietly renege on by Valentines'. To not do so would be positively UNAMERICAN, so let's get started!

Just remember: The ol' "better diet and more exercise" routine is BO-RING. Nobody cares if you ever fit into your college jeans again, mkay? So why not give us something with a little more zip? A little more pizazz? A little more "yahoo and how?"

You know, like: 

- Better bowel habits.

Or drinking less booze. Really, this cake works for both.

- Become a vegetarian

That's always a hip, happening kind of choice - unlike using the words "hip" and/or "happening." And if you need a little incentive:

Thaaaat oughta do it.

 (The baker sent this to me herself, btw, so don't think I'm being mean by leaving that watermark on. And yes, it's SUPPOSED to be bloody fried chicken. So speaking as someone who really likes fried chicken, I'd like to wish a pox on the house of Jen's Just Desserts - while fully realizing the overwhelming irony of the name.)

For a more intellectual New Year's goal, how about:

- Go to college

Clown college totally counts. Plus it's perfect for anyone who hates children*!

Here's one we can all aspire to: 

- Be more supportive of friends and loved ones:

'Nuff said.

Or, finally, in 2023:

- Don't be afraid to admit when you've made a mistake.

 After all, there's no shame in admitting when you're wrong.

There are, however, certain website audiences which will get a real kick out of it.

Thanks to Anony M., Jen R., Diana, Michelle B., & Sarah G. for the suggestions. Personally, I think I'm going with "play more video games" and "leave the house more." You, uh, don't suppose those two will interfere with each other, do you? o.0

*I say this as a former clown who does, in fact, have a strong dislike of children. (Hey, don't judge 'til you've seen a roving pack of unsupervised children descend upon a single clown bearing a bag of candy, ok? They're animals. ANIMALS, I tell you!)