My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Supermom VS the Diabolical Decorator of Doom

And now it's time for another installment of.... SUPERMOM!!

[Duh da daaa! Da da da ta da DAAAA!]

This week, Supermom plans out little Annie's birthday party.

Annie: "Wow, Supermom, my birthday decorations look fantastic! This is going to be the coolest Wizard of Oz party EVER!"

Supermom: "Oh, it was nothing, really. After I finished all of the laundry, balanced the checkbook, and then reworked my dissertation on the ending of world hunger, I had plenty of time!"

Annie: "Oh, wow, are those cookies for the party, too?"

Supermom: "They sure are! It took four days, and I had to stay up all night hand-piping the little rainbows, but all that time and effort were well worth seeing the smile on your darling face. And just wait 'til you see the great Yellow Brick Road cake I ordered! Your father should be here with it any minute..."

Meanwhile, at the Bakery of Badness:

Diabolical Decorator of Doom: "What's this? Supermom has ordered a Wizard of Oz birthday cake for her daughter? Hee-hee! Oh, this is too perfect! Finally, revenge will be MINE!!!"

Diabolical Sidekick: "What will you do, oh Great Bastion of Badness? Oh Foul Foiler of Fondant? Oh Illustrious Icer of Ickines, Dastardly Decorator of Destruction, and Cruel Crafter of..."

Diabolical Decorator of Doom: [interrupting] "Do shut up, Sidekick; I'm trying to think."

Diabolical Sidekick: "A thousand apologies, Oh Putrescent Purveyor of Pastries!"

Diabolical Decorator of Doom: [rubbing hands together] "Now, the trick is to make something so vile, so heinous, that no one will ever, EVER think it is a yellow brick road with a rainbow over it. But how? What tool in my arsenal is capable of such complete and utter hideousness?

"AHA! I've got it! Diabolical Sidekick, fetch me the Airbrush of Atrocity!"

Later, back at the party:


Annie: [sobbing] "My Yellow Brick Road cake! It looks like an old squished banana! And why does it dead end in a river? And is THAT supposed to be a rainbow?!?"

Supermom: "Never fear, dear daughter: Supermom is here! Now be a good girl and hand Mommy her piping bags."

So Supermom (aka Amanda S.) re-frosted the cake at home, thus foiling the evil plans of the Diabolical Decorator of Doom and saving the day. (You can see she's already begun piping over the "road" in the photo there.) Good work, Supermom! Score another one for truth, justice, and sugary-baked goods for all!

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Reader Comments (184)

Holy cow! It's a plastered plantain!

When Annie's birthday comes around next year, remember the old adage about where to get the birthday cake: "There's no place like home ... there's no place like home ..."

Word verification: hypectin. A hyper version of that which makes jam?

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterScritzy

This is why I never order a cake. I always make them myself. Disgusting moldy cake!!! Yuck, what were they thinking?

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDustythemomhaskins

Please tell me she got a refund! Or at least a discount?

Or failing that that the cake at least tasted good under its double layer of icing.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBookwyrme

Another headless giraffe here.

And I wasn't sure *what* the river was supposed to be.

And color me silly, but I would've put the rainbow at the bottom of the cake. Because the song isn't "Somewhere Under the Rainbow."

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterpepperjackcandy

Yeah, what did Supermom's cake look like after she fixed it?

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBrown-Eyed Girl

Jane said....
This has to be the winner for the year! The child could have done a better job.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteryardsailor

So--what is your immediate reaction when your supermarket-in-a-box baker hands you this atrocity? I mean do you smile, put it in your buggy and say thanks? I mean, really? Honest to the Almighty, there's no way I would pay for that! I think folks take these cakes home SIMPLY to post them here for our amusement.
Heather (didn't sign up for a blogger name..)

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

She really IS Supermom...I bet she wishes she'd stayed up just one more night to make it herself! I guess it goes to show, don't ask others to do what you can do for yourself!

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBecky B

You are hilarious!

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCharly

ROFL - this was a fantastic post. I loved your devilish evil cake decorator. Glad supermom came to the rescue

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

i hope she got her money back!

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly

those cookies rocked supermom! i wish i had me some for my birthday :)

as for the yellow brick road, wtf, seriously?

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLaura/Notepad

I too thought 'banana slug' at first glance.

And +1 for wanting to see the fixed version. :-)

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

There is only one word I can think of that describes both the cake (WRECK) and the WRECKrator:

CHUTZPUH !!!!!!!!!!!!

Talk about a set of brass ones! They (the store that sold this) actually expected money for this cake wreck?

I repeat:

CHUTZPAH !!!!!!!!!!!!!

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO

perfectly done post. just loved how it kept me waiting in suspense and when i actually got to the wreck itself, it was even worse than i'd imagined - i can not imagine that poor mom's let down upon seeing that cake. she'd worked so hard on those cookies. squashed banana - very insightful and true for sure. i wouldn't have guessed wizard of oz with 20 guesses.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLibba Roberts

It's the bi rainbow! Don't want our kids growing up TOO gay, I guess. Or maybe they have a hidden bi agenda.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTeh Cole

Ok one thing no one pointed out that is my hugest pet peeve on cakes... the top and bottom border are different colors.

The bottom border is a bright pink, and the top white.

I know I have some OCD issues but I hate seeing sheet cakes with mismatched border colors. It's all I can look at when I look at that picture.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCarolyn

Putrescent Purveyor of Pastries FTW!
Of course, that delightful display of alliteration wouldn't have been possible without such a kickass storyline to begin with.
This a real hall of fame blog entry!

[word verification: phibu. A flightless bird with a patholigical lying problem.]

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMisha

Hey! That's no rainbow! That's a flying saucer! And a pretty awesome looking one at that. Way better than the one that picked me up.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterelesa

GREATEST POST EVER!!!! you had me laughing on the floor for half an hour... your blog is by far my favorite ever! thank you for making my days a bit brighter everyday.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAdriana

and this is why I make my cakes and decorate them at home

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

The decorator was obviously not a "Friend of Dorothy!"

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHottpants

I like the little story you conjured up. You forgot to add one thing, though:

Diabolical Decorator of Doom: Curses! Foiled again! By the piping bags of Hades, I will get my REVEEENGE!! *shakes fist at the sky*

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That is hideous. And I too would love to see a picture of the fixed cake.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Rotten Banana, Yellow Brick Road... I could see how you could confuse the two.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMs Ashley

Is there a picture of the re-frosted cake?

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJennie

I actually whimpered out loud when I saw that "road." To be fair, in the book they do have to cross a river, but the road continues on the other side...

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterClare K. R. Miller

Oh, my.
That is absolutely horrendous!
Word verification: mocks.
I think it's a sign- the verification is mocking the cake wreck!
Also- loved the writing, Jen. As a retired journalism teacher, I can safely say that you'd have gotten an 'A' in my class!
And I, too, would love to see the Supermom version of this cake.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDeb

Go Supermom! I wish there was a picture of the cake after she fixed it : )))

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Cee

I would NOT pay for that. Nuh-uh.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Yea! Someone else besides me thought it was a banana slug!! The rainbow bending the wrong was is rather disturbing as well.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That conversation with the diabolical decorator of doom sounded awfully like a normal conversation between me and one of my friends.

That cake made me sad ):

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh. My. God.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterihopeyoudancehmg

I would love a Wizard of Oz birthday party!

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterFhtrkstr101

WTH, I serously hope they didn't have to pay for that rotten banana cake. So glad Supermom was able to fix it up for sweet little Annie.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

I just wanted to say thank you. I just found your blog and have spent the last hour or so scrolling through and laughing out loud.

I hope that you post your final, fixed, yellow brick road cake and I hope that Annie had a great birthday

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBeth

Love the commentary, Jen! I do hope SuperMom sends you a pic of the fixed version.

Thanks for a great laugh!

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That looks like a really crappy version of the My Little Pony cake from DecoPac.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

Wow... I definitely want to see a picture of the finished product!

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSerena

wow. i'm speechless. really. so ugly.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

In the rainforests of the Pacific Northwest they have slugs that look just like that.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAviatrix

Is it just me, or do the black spots make the yellow section look mouldy?

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDexX

This really is tragic. But I love that "Annie's" mom was fixing it up, and I'd love to see the eventual results.

You should start a spin-off site: Cake Fixes: Where Good People Repair Bad Cakes.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSabrina

Hello everyone! it is me, Amanda S., AKA, SuperMom. I don't have much to say about this cake, as I do not wish to relive the pain! It really did take me four days to make those cookies, and my sweet husband went to the store to pick up the cake for me. When he opened it up, I believe his words were, "Is THIS what you asked for?" I am pretty sure I ledt out a little scream, and cried a little, and immediately said to Nonni, get me the icing out of the pantry, the food coloring and a piping bag. i DO have after pictures, but will not be able to send them in for a few days. All i was able to repair was the yellow brick road, because we got the cake an hour before the party. The nakedness in the corner of the photo is a half dressed birthday girl, watching me fix her cake. All of the Wizard of Oz decorations are from birthday express, and they were super cute. About three weeks after this cake wreck, I decided to start my own business, and i will be making my own cakes from now on!

I am so relieved to know that you all see the wreckiness of this cake too!

keep up the good work cake wrecks, this made my day!!!

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteramanda seale

Supermom ought to just do the whole thing herself. But it is frustrating when you're capable of making something, and you hire someone else to do it to save time or whatever, and it turns out worse than if you WEREN'T capable in the first place.

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered Commentercadylee

wow, sounds like she should have just ordered a blank cak with grean grass and blue sky and decorated the rest her self... what an awesome mom!

Other then that i'd say the cake looks weird it has a rainbow on the left and partial on the right then a river as you called it that interupts the yellow brick road... who thinks of these things...

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterpitchersbakery

I also want to see the fixed cake!


WVWOTD: drings

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterInnocent Observer

craig said"Clearly this was just another case of miscommunication. The decorator didn't hear yellow brick road as much as yellow blech mold."

OMG sooo funny..

I thought it was a safari range rover accident where the giraffe didn't survive.

Or that's raw sewage headed for the blue lake now that OZ is being developed for condos.

word verification: inesses; plural for inny belly buttons. "all my family members have inesses"

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHavocec

As a Kansas girl, I think I'm offended by the original "artwork". How dare someone mess up the sacred Yellow Brick Road? ;)

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBets

Does anyone else see a spaceship beaming up the banana??

November 18, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterlrmaggie

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