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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Saturday
May312008

When Brides Have No Budget (Or Taste)


Obviously someone needed to rein in this woman during the wedding planning. What kind of ego does it require to commission a life-sized replica of yourself in cake? But what really baffles me is this: the details are exact right down to the hair clip, so what the heck is UP with that tacky red rick-rack down the skirt of the cake? "Sure, we hand-painted a matching bodice-design, copied the make-up and hairstyle, and have identical veils - but then we thought this giant rick-rack would add just the right extra touch!" ?!?

Obviously Bridezilla shares my opinion: she's eying that red trim with murder in her eyes.

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Reader Comments (229)

Thank you Seoul Brother for typing the words "ginormous budonkudonk" in your comment. Never have I seen those two little words typed together before. I'm sure my neighbor thinks I am CRAZY because I am laughing so hard.
P.S. Can you imagine being a guest at that wedding & walking into the reception hall & seeing that for the first time? What a shock! I'm sure punch came out of someone's nose. :P

August 19, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjme

Even if *some* of it is polymer, that's one HUGE cake - how many guests could they have had??!

"Dinner will not be served at the reception. Everyone will be sustained solely on cake. Don't worry. There's plenty."

August 21, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAndreaB

I think the rickrack is there so that no one cut into the actual bride by mistake. :)

August 22, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm just freaked out that the grooms left arm is three feet longer than his right arm.

August 23, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterspelcheker

Is that guy standing behind her a cake too?

August 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJen

That gives an entirely new meaning to the phrase "getting a piece of [butt]".

August 26, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterpeepbunny

TRT, you're thinking of the http://memory-alpha.org/en/wiki/Image:Cellular_peptide_cake.jpg" REL="nofollow">cellular peptide cake (with mint frosting) from "http://memory-alpha.org/en/wiki/Phantasms_(episode)" REL="nofollow">Phantasms". You can't see it in that picture, but it was made of Troi.

August 28, 2008 | Unregistered Commentergrendelkhan

O___O I've never ever EVER seen anything like this before... Not even on the Cake Challenges on Food Network!
I would've loved to see the reaction of the pastry chef (or team of pastry chefs) that got the memo to do this.
Besides, I thought weddings were the joining of a couple why is it only the bride who's in cake form??

August 28, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

Kristen, I'd wager it's the same reason why the bride buys her dress, while the groom rents his tux. Why the bride is walked down the aisle to much ceremony by her father, while the groom is just kind of standing there rather than being presented by his mom. Why when I interned for a kinda creepy wedding photographer, the weddings were organized by the bride's name, as the groom was just another accessory.

It's supposed to be a big shindig for the woman's benefit, in order to make up for the ensuing decades of picking up the dude's socks.

August 29, 2008 | Unregistered Commentergrendelkhan

do you think they saved her head for the one-year anniversary

no really, imagine keeping a life-sized replica of your wife's head in your freezer.

hey honey, where did you put the frozen waffles?

they're where i always put them...on the second shelf...next to my HEAD

oh right....

August 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The guy in the picture is my cousin!!!! I nearly laughed out loud at work when I found this. I have NO IDEA what they were thinking.

September 16, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

the red "rick rack", is obviously there for the groom's sake... so he knows which "sweetypie honeycake" to stick the knife into, and which to go home with!...

September 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJannick R. Chr.

I thought it was a PIZZA on her chest??? Anyone else?

September 18, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I like how buddy has a Go-Go gadget arm that is 3 feet long wrapped lovingly around her waist. Kirsten

September 22, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

And I think the pattern on the cake dress bodice matches the groom's tie instead of her dress which "ties" it all in nicely.

September 22, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

the man behind her is actually a cake also, her real husband is cowering in the corner!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDr. T

I was watching something on WE the other night and saw a preview for a new show - "My Fair Wedding." Some wedding planner guy helps prevent weddings from turning into distasters...And, at one point in the commercial, the girl says "and my wedding cake will be shaped like...ME!." This is the first thing I thought of when I heard that...

October 2, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/01/07/cake.irpt/index.html That has more pictures of the cake from other angles.

October 3, 2008 | Unregistered Commentercorrin

Nah, the bride is unhappy because after she saw the cake, she realized that she wanted it even larger. Because 3/4 life-size just wasn't large enough.
Poor, poor man.

October 9, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterShari

And they say America is the land of excess! Wowsa! Of course, the bride has relocated to Texas, so that could explain her quick acculturation into 'living large'.

October 9, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

What's the big deal? It's all pink on the inside.

October 22, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This must be what Lewis Carroll was thinking about when he wrote:

He came as a baker but owned when too late (and it drove the poor Bellman half-mad)
He could only bake bridecake for which I may state no materials were to be had.

October 28, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBlondin

See, I think the Groom has that "Isn't this just the greatest surprise I could possibly have gotten her? I'm so proud of myself" look, whereas the Bride has the "What the...? That's not my tasteful 7-tier apricot cream filled rolled fondant covered decorated with hand rolled pearls cake!"

October 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDeb

You gotta love her expression.

November 2, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterPersephone

Exactly how long is the groom's left arm Hmmm? - - 7 or 8 feet long?

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This cake actually made it into the papers in the UK!!! I know because I tore the page out and sent it to my friend whose wedding cake I was making and asked if she would like somthing similar..... (she declined. Politely though)

November 9, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Sharafat,
Ugly cake.Silly wedding cake idea.What happened to"taste and class"

November 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

OMG It's just like the commercial for "My Fair Wedding" The same person had to make both those cakes.

I can't imagine the thought even going through someone's mind. I mean really!

November 19, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterChrista

I can only hope that red rick-rack isn't out of sight on the other side of the bride's dress, where it would be IRL.

November 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Just imagine she saves the top teir of the cake for the 1st anniversary but has her house searched by the police, they find a head in the freezer. hmmm gives you something to think about. haha

November 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAli

Is no one noticing that the cake version of her is a ringer for Macy Gray, maybe she's not a fan of Macy's music and that's why she is so pissed off? Just a thought...

December 11, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteressee

Don't forget that it's tradition to save the top tier of the wedding cake to be eaten on the 1st anniversary. That means that for a year these people are going to have a replica of the bride's head in their freezer!!

December 17, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterGenevieve

My heavens! That couple just got married and now they're eating eachother? Wonder what happens when they have kids?

December 19, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Tonight, at 11:00. "It should have been the happiest day of her life, she had the dress, the handsome groom, and the dream wedding cake of her childhood. Little did she know that disaster was soon to strike. An over-zealous caterer, charged with cutting and serving the wedding dessert, mistook the actual bride for her lookalike cake, and thrust his 10 inch butchers knife into the newly married woman's abdomen. Guests, who were too busy trying to convince the cake/bride to throw her icing bouquet, didn't realize the tragic slaying had occurred until the paramedics arrived.
It was unclear whether they were going to serve the rest of the cake at the memorial service.

December 22, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSue S.

I bet the baker made mega bucks I would have if it were me. I think the cake is ugly but I heard the baker is one of the best ones in the Dalllas area.

December 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLezley

RE: the groom, I'm actually jealous. A life-sized replica of my fiancee made of delicious cake would probably be the most awesome thing I could think of.

December 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJoe

Ummm.. I believe I saw this couple on Dr. Phil, about Brides who go a bit overboard on their wedding days. Her friends/relatives were actually calling her Bridezilla. If that's not the couple, sure looks just like them!

January 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

geez.... can you imagine the guests:
"look! i got the boob!"
"i'm poking her eye out with my fork!"

January 28, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I wonder what the grooms cake looked like

January 29, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterlad_seldon

They couldn't carry her HUGE life-sized cake in one piece (boobs and booty!) so they had to bring it in halves...and cover their secret with a BRIGHT RED ZIGGY patch up line. Well, it only takes an idiot to agree to making this cake...

February 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

actually i think this is pretty amazing... take skillz to make it look so much like the bride! stop the hate!

February 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Um, I met the maker of this cake at a craft fair I entered last year! OMG. She does all kinds of cakes like this.

February 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShannon and Carey

Now ya' gotta wonder where they are displaying her clay torso and how creepy it would be to have around the house.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRebecca Kline

It would be creepier if they made her as a cake at her funeral. Mmm lets eat dead person. Then, little did the guests realise it was so lifelike they accidentally eat the real person. Mmm so chewy, oh, wait.... s**t!

I do have to admit that this is awesome (cake skills) and yay to the baker if there is such a demand for it.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLisa Crunkhorn

This bride and her clone bride cake were featured on a Style Network's program: Who's Wedding is it Anyway? And yes, she wanted tons of money spent to have her dream wedding, yes she ordered the cake, no it didn't bother her to cut into herself. Her face looked like that the whole show. I don't know about the whole effigy thing. I seem to remember her explanation was that she never had dolls as a child and could now finally have a doll. So what better doll than one that looks like her? No comments on how the doll/cake/clones decorations totally don't look like her dress and look like deranged paisley tadpoles?

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterfotohok

the only things that are different are the necklaces and the flowers in that particular spot on the cake :D

February 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Dee said...So do they save the head to eat for the 1 year anniversary?

February 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Dee said...So do they save the head to eat for the 1 year anniversary?

February 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Betcha there's rickrack on the real bride's dress on the right side. Why the hate on rickrack? It's good stuff. This cake is quite a feat.

February 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSarah in Brooklyn

It's the husband's idea!
Look at the pride on his face and compare it to the look of horror on hers...it's the first time she's seen it.

Martin of Harrow

March 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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