If there's one thing I've learned from this blog, it's that there's a cake for everything. Vasectomies, divorces, fecal triumphs - bakeries come through where even Hallmark is left speechless. So for those of you reading this through squinted, blood-shot eyes, nursing a killer migraine, and wondering if God was actually paying attention to your 4AM porcelain-throne confessional this morning: cheer up; there's a cake for that.
Binky here is part of the new "scare 'em sober" line of cake kits. Nothing says "drink in moderation" quite like a deceased flattened clown with charred lumps for feet, right? "And that's why it's important to remember "stop, drop and roll" when doing flaming shots, boys and girls!"
Look familiar? I hope not; anyone who keeps a big mass of string cheese in their bathroom has serious hygiene issues. I'm glad the guy is labeled a "Party Animal", though: otherwise you might think this was celebrating the flu or food poisoning.
(Bonus Side Tangent Competition: Who can be the first to find me an actual cake celebrating the flu or food poisoning? C'mon; you know they're out there!)
And then there's Charlie, who shows us once and for all that you're never too old to party:
Charlie apparently likes to rock the Casbah with a couple of redskin potatoes shoved down the back of his pants. He also has a gargantuan toilet with a joystick on the seat, which he doesn't like to talk about.
(Yes, it's "professional". What, don't you trust me?)
Well, Happy New Year, everyone! Here's to a Wrecktastic 2009.
Thanks to Sarah N., and Stefani H.!