My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Introducing a Good Sport

A select few of you have virtually met Anne-Marie, my Wrecksistant-Extraordinaire. Since I technically still have a "day job", she helps me and John with comment moderation and handles the bulk of the e-mailed submissions, in addition to having a full-time job of her own. Anne-Marie is one of those rare individuals who is hysterically funny both in writing AND in person, which I know first-hand 'cuz she's also my sister-in-law. (Yeah, I'm lucky like that.)

I realized recently that I was greatly under utilizing Anne-Marie's powers for good when she reduced me to helpless giggles with an e-mail extolling the virtues of actually turning the oven ON when cooking a Christmas ham. It was then that I knew hers was a talent that must be shared. So, without further ado, I give you: Anne-Marie! Take it, Ree!

With the college football Bowl Championship Series behind us, and the Super Bowl looming ahead, the nation's bakeries are hard at work, providing us with an overabundance of sporty buttercreaminess.

Clancy R. shows us what happens when bakers with too much time on their hands play a game of Wreckerator Pictionary...

Sheldon: "It's a Dutch Oven!"

Walter: "No, you guys... wait, lemme write something on it..."

The other team: "Whoa! You can't write anything - just draw!"

Walter: "Too late... any guesses?"

Sheldon: "Uhh, a Dutch Oven full of sugar?"

Walter: [facepalm]

Amy G. found this gem:


What's the first thing that comes to mind when you think of the Oklahoma

Time's up!

How many of you thought of a disembodied torso in a full-coverage 42 DD Playtex Eighteen-Hour Bra?


And finally, the Steelers were playing the day this was made, hence the black and yellow:

It is supposed to be read as “Go D-fence” (as in ‘go defense’ – see the little fence after it?), but to me and alert Wreckporter Noelle C, it says only one thing:

The Almighty is a Steelers fan.

Many thanks to Anne-Marie for pulling up the slack in the sports arena here on Wrecks. (Yep, she actually had to
tell me it was football season.) Y'all be nice to her, now, or else your e-mails just may never see the light of day.

(Just kidding.)

(No, I'm not.)

« Think They're Organic? [smirk] | Main | Double Your Photos, Double Your "Fun" »

Reader Comments (137)

Good Job Anne-Marie!

Loved it.


Keep on wreckin!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTaryn(brrrrr...)

Ugh! Sugar Bowl...srsly.
I'm still lost on the torso for the Sooners...
BUT, one thing I do know for sure, is that if God is a football fan, He's definately backing the Steelers! Go STEELERS!!! (and any Steeler fan would be able to read that inscription, wrecky as it is, without pause or thought to what the wreckorater actually meant. Go D#!!!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCara

wow---the Sugar Bowl, and thank you for spelling out "Go defense" but, what does the Oklahoma one mean?? I give up.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjoyce

Good thing I have learned to quit drinking anything when coming here... although my next tip is to go to the bathroom first too... OMG! These are great!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkdmoffett25

"sporty buttercreaminess" - hi-la-rious!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterad

Wreckerator pictionary - we're playing along at home!

Welcome Ree! :)

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKate

Dang! I was wondering where my bra went!!!!

On a more serious note, I have a friend from Pittsburgh who will fight you tooth and nail to prove that god is a Steelers fan. Go figure....

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenternissarella

I 'got' the Sugar Bowl cake right off. But the busty OU cake? Doesn't really fit. LOL
And I'd have never gotten "defense" out of the last one.
shakes head
Amy B

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

"It's a dutch oven full of sugar!" *dies laughing* A sudden and horrific reminder of why I never play Pictionary.
And when I think of the Sooners I always think of lingerie because...well... *drawing a blank*
Moving on then. I'm definitely seeing the God thing there. And I'd love to make jokes about him being in on the fantasy football rankings with Buddha, Allah and company but I have a feeling I'll get flamed.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLeslie

You just have to hope the torso cake was a special order that didn't get picked up, so they stuck it in the case. Otherwise, I don't want to even imagine what goes on in THAT decorator's mind.

WV: Costs - Cake Wrecks costs me to lose my job because I'm supposed to be working instead of cruising cake pictures.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Courteous Chihuahua

"The Almighty is a Steelers fan."

well, duh! ;)

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterevilsciencechick

I would have totally bought the torso Sooners cake.

Actually I was just excited that I knew the Sooners were a football team. Maybe it's a disembodied Sooners cheerleader and the cake is actually for the other team who plans to rip the Sooners (and cheerleaders) to shreds. Just a thought though.

Great job Anne-Marie, I thoroughly enjoyed it!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLildonbro

I looked at the last one and was saying... YoD? What is a YoD?

Somethings are better left alone!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStefanie

The Sugar Bowl cake was a wreck out of the gate for one reason....WHIPPED TOPPING. Guh-ross.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

There is not one part of that torso I would eat. Creepy!!!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHorribleLicensePlates

Get rid of the "her's" in paragraph 2 before somebody shows up with a camera! You don't want a screenshot to end up on somebody's Grammar Wrecks site.

(it's just "hers")

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAaron

Welcome Ree!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commentergreenbean

Looks more like a 36DD bra to me, judging from the ribcage width. (for those wagering on the bra size)

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Great Job, Anne-Marie!
I see that the tag for this post is "Beyond Bizarre" and I fully and totally agree with that. Wow. I love all the blank space above the sugar dutch oven. The Sooners' cake is just, ah, well, [trying to think of something to describe it]--Oh nuts, I give up on that one. Go D-fence sounds like something my horses would say when they would rather be on the other side of d-fence.
Since I have started reading this blog, I have been looking at the cakes at the stores I shop at. I never have looked at decorated cakes because I can't stand to eat them--way too much sugar frosting on top of a way too sweet cake that is otherwise blah in taste. It is good to know that while these cakes are inedible to me, they do provide humor.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterOldMorgans

that's so funny - I didn't even notice the last cake until you mentioned it. Good job Anne Marie!

I have only one thing to say: give Anne-Marie a raise. Whatever you're paying her, it's not enough.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPaul Riddell

I read that one as "Yo D-fence!", but that goes to show what I know about divine intervention and football.

Welcome aboard, Anne-Marie!

WV: perathe. I must beware perathe of the Almighty.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjengersnap

OK, am I the only one that's wondering what's up with the weird nipple-ring-leash things on the torso cake? Or do the loop and squiggly lines actually look like something else to other people?

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterlizzied

HAHA, sadly I understood the Sugar Bowl one and the Go D-fence once. I am still at a loss for the OU......


January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDouble A Training

How many of you thought of a disembodied torso in a full-coverage 42 DD Playtex Eighteen-Hour Bra?

Well. That elicited a very unladylike snort from me.

Word Verification: aends - Another Emokid's Nintendo DS?

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterelsolylaluna

Like someone said- the "D-(fence)" image is a pretty well known one here in Steeltown, so I wouldn't necessarily make it a wreck because of that- it's a "visual colloquialism" if you will. HOWEVER... that does not excuse the vertical placement wonkiness, nor the randomly splooged drool-y looking dark stuff over the yellow border. That's actually the first thing I noticed and assumed was the wreckiness. Nothing says "yummy treat" to me like yellow stuff with dark brown ooze.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMaria

Here's a CRAZY idea for football season - how about a FOOTBALL-shaped cake? Maybe they couldn't differentiate them from the Thanksgiving turkey wrecks, but at least a football cake would be better than these disasters!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLori

My mother will be happy to know that God is on the Steeler's side.

My only question is, how do you ask someone which part of the Sooner's cake they want?

"Do you want the left boob or the right boob?"

"Actually, I'd like a bit of panty."

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterN.starluna

AKA NoelleC:
I'm not really sure why the decorator felt the need to jam "go" and "defense" all on the top the cookie...

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCupcakeKitten

Ha! I give you props for the Big Bang Theory reference!! And that was hilarious, by the way... I totally pictured Sheldon saying "A Dutch oven full of sugar?" and explaining that he couldn't possibly guess sugar bowl because it looks nothing like a sugar bowl and re-drawing it himself and everyone looking at him like they hate him... which they probably do...

WV: "oulat"... This post was oulats of funny!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdomino_dreams

Not to be a jerk or anything, but I'm a stickler for spelling/grammar. In your introduction, it's "hers," not "her's." But you're hilarious anyway.

As is your sister-in-law. :)

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

sugar dutch oven= hilarious.
And I hate to say it, but I totally want that Steelers cake. I'm guessing its from Giant Eagle or Wal-mart. Better yet, I might make my own. I'll send in photos if I do. Let's go D!
I've also seen Steelers fans in the stands holding up a capital letter D and an cardboard section of fence. Actually, someone (if not already) should bring an actual piece of fence to the game, if allowed. or not.Freekin' classic.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterslanted.enchanted

The Steelers are the best team ever. EVER. Also, I bet that cake was sold in Giant Eagle... but my local one usually never has wrecks. But I say that a cake that supports the Steelers can't be a wreck, because, as that cake shows, God supports us. GO D#!!!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterReba

yay Anne-Marie!

YoD... I saw that too.

WV: guill. It a Guill!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLinnea

omg i got the big bang theory reference too!


keep her keep her!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterandlaughing

OM"G" - Stefanie, I totally thought it said YoG as well. I understand football and I was lost for who G is.

Anne-Marie - nice work!
These cakes are crazy and the OU on the boob cake, I thought maybe they were attempting to be French "OUI OUI", but no, they just made the least edible cake ever.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBibi

of course the almighty is a fan! ; )

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSherry

I'm still waiting for the first "Boomer Sooner!" of the day. So I can cringe, like always, when they say that. Freakin' Okies...

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I really didn't get the "Sugar Bowl" one but I am not sports inclined. Though I am creeped out by the belly button on the Sooners cake, it looks like it is talking to me and I keep thinking of Seinfeld.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is anyone else grossed out that the belly button on the torso looks like someone just swiped the cake for a taste of the frosting?

Word Verification: consi. I consi a cake wreck over in that case. :)

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMaryAnn

you know what this post has inspired me to do:

The next time I'm having a good ol' time with the Coors (yes, I said Coors!) and football at home I'm gonna visit this site.
No longer is it only for M - F 9-5...I cannot even imagine how much I'll laugh when I'm drunk!

rionogri: my favorite italian curry dish

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJennyKitten

Why, its' the Sugar Bowl of course! The OU one still has me perplexed...

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKimboSue

Wow. I am ashamed to say the disembodied Sooner torso came from my state. What a sad, sad, that's actually funny. :) good job.--Kelly B.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The sugar bowl one wouldn't be so bad if the scale had not been so poor. It just seems off. (Although a larger sugar bowl may have increased the dutch-oven effect.)

D-fence and bikini torso OU boobs? No words.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCandy

Football isn't big here in Western Canada (we're Hockey folks). So I take delight in this Wrecky-Sport.

word verification:
Caleri: Them Cakes be loaded with Caleri.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMeagan

OU = Oklahoma University? Maybe? Weird, when I first looked at it, I couldn't figure out why anyone would want a female torso cake, never mind the leaky breasts!
God#...I thought they had made a typo and scratched it out.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCeili

The first one surely is meant to be for the Sugar Bowl (Alabama vs, Utah, BTW) and they just left room for the teams' names.

The Sooners torso was fabulous---
My husband called it the Trifecta:
"Sports, sweets, sex....what's not to love?"

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterheartafire

You better believe God is a Steelers fan! Yeah, baby! Goin' for the Six Pack!

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMeg

A while back someone brought to Cake Wrecks attenton that a supermarket in NJ refused to make a cake for little Adolf Hitler and his sibling(s). This news story states that the three children have been removed from their home I think we all got what we were hoping for.

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKT

Of course the Almighty is Steeler's fan. And as someone who bleeds black and gold, I admit I cringed when I saw that.

And great job Anne-Marie... it's good to have a back-up just as good as the starter! ;}

January 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWenzday18

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>