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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Jul212009

I'm Guessing They Didn't Have a Matching Card

Well, at least it didn't say "Happy".
(And you have to admit: the glowsticks are an inspired touch.)

Mmmm, cancer rat.

Slice of dead Lenin, anyone?

I mean, it looks just like Lenin's perfectly preserved corpse, so I know you're salivating already. Why, just look how excited the kiddies are!

"No, not the cold shoulder; I want a slice of the iron fist! Now quit Stalin and get me some Lenin-ade to wash it down with, or this joint won’t be getting any high Marx from me."

Of course the best part was saved for the VIPs:


Ah, a little jawbone with a scoop of ice cream on the side... [kissing fingertips] magnifique!

Ellie P., Whitney G., & Ann W., I think I'm going to need a Unicorn Chaser, stat.

- Related Wreckage: Any Occasion Will Do


UPDATE: Wow, thanks for all the entries in the dead Lenin caption contest, guys! The winning caption is a combination of what Taylor, Jenniffer, the Suttons, & Anne S. wrote. Oh, and my friend Abby came up with "slice of the iron fist."

And here are a few more that made me laugh:

"Lenin cake again?" - Ivory Girl

"I said I wanted a LEMON cake." - Judy

"Well, it’s better than cancer rat.” – Chris

"Crotch, please!" - BookTender

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Reader Comments (549)

A cake for the 30th anniversary of 3 Mile Island? Might as well have one for Chernobyl. Very tacky. "Hey, thousands of people died a horrible death from leukemia! Let's have cake!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

Can I have a little more brachial artery filling on that?

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKim G.

"but moooooooooom! i wanted chocolate! this cake tastes like Marxism and vodka!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMess Maker

'Tastes like chicken!'

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatie-Jo

"Yea! Dark meat."

That's just grooooooss.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermrs. q.

I am just glad they didn't use red velvet cake. Scary. I think the little girl is saying she doesn't want a chunk of shoulder, she wants the dudes nose.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelinda

Oh, crap. Kyle wins.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermrs. q.

I want a corner piece!

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLiz

The last picture reminded me of Sacha Cohen in Sweeney Todd....
"I shava the beard."

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Don't give me the armpit! I don't waaaaant the armpit!

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCrunchy Sews

Oops that should have read...

I want a CORONER piece!
(not corner)

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLiz

Janie said...with all those brains and heart...you probably had to have a courage just to eat it...as for the rat..think it was a red cake? YUCK

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJanie

"I want the heart!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAlexandra

Well, Russia has a museum with a whole section dedicated to deformed babies in jars. The Lenin cake is pretty tame compared to that...

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHannah the Fish

"I want the breast!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjengersnap

"Dibs on the funny bone"

There is sooooooo much wrong with this thing that words cannot describe.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDebbra

"Mommy, when I die, can I be chocolate cake?"

~Flemmily

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFlemmily

She is quaoting Willy Wonka in the new version Everything in this room is eatable even you, that is called cannibalism and is frowned on in most cultures. Well that is what I thought when i saw this!

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBev

"Is that grape Kool-Aid on the other table? Mmmmmm"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCassie

Anyone else get a "Tom Petty / Alice in Wonderland" video vibe from eating a person lying in state cake? Shivers.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjengersnap

She´s thinking: ¨Oh, no...if thís is the cake-version, then whát did we have a the communist party last night?¨
Or, perhaps,
¨Hey, they´re giving me the cold shoulder!¨

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatja Boumans

"Daddy, does this mean that we are really, really poor? I mean, we're eating Lenin!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Yes father... I am proud to remove Comrade Lenin's embalmed body from Red Square. He deserves a proper burial in mah BELLY!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEloni

Ok, I didn't read all the posts I'll admit--but I'm voting for this caption:

The Kitchen Gadget Goddess said...

"No fair! I wanted the cold, dead spot where his heart was supposed to be!"

This made me laugh as I was attempting to eat a scone--bad combo.

And that Lenin cake has got to be one of the biggest stomach turners you've posted. And I was eating. :(

WV: comablim....What the Lenin cake looks like it's in...

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterummpumpkinseed

"MOM! I wanted CHOCOLATE!!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCyndi

"Communism is morally, ethically, spiritually, physically positively, absolutely, undeniably and reliably dead. It is not only merely dead, it's really most sincerely dead."

"Good! Let's eat!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"He'll not be giving me the cold shoulder again" :)

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHelga Hansen

She says: "You murderers, you killed him!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMaaike

ooooooooo, I want his heart! Why is it cold? Is this ice cream cake?

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterbeachbabies

You can't split the shoulder in half! I wanted the whole thing!

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJErich-Oh's

I wanted to say "Hey, I think it's still moving!" but two people wrote that already...

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPlume

There better not be real hair in that!

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjedijson

Hey! I wanna piece of the moustache, mister!

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteranna

"Yeah, yeah. No amount of political freedom will satisfy the hungry masses, but a bigger slice than that freakin' sliver would help, Comrade!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterErin...

Go for the jugular!

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterthehorizontalyoyo

Girl:

"You know, my mom said chocolate was better pre-Peristroika!"

W. Reynolds
NYC

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"My mom told me that I destroy my enemy when I make him my friend. I say that's Bolshevik! I destroy my enemy when I eat him limb for limb."

This cake must be from a future cannibals of the world rally?

WV: Inuroo. After hearing her daughter say that, her mom yelled, "get inuroo...." but stopped abruptly when her daughter shot daggers at her that indicated she might be the next destroyed enemy.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHolly

"DADDY! I wanted a Beatles themed party with a LENNON cake! Can't you get anything right?"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

Look close....second girl on the left is coming back for seconds. eeekk.
That other poor child in the middle looks traumatized. I would be too!

Becky

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Dearly Beloved,
We are gathered here today
to eat Cancer Rat.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Little girl is saying "Cool, they included Maggots!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRoxie

"I said left TESTICLE, not left ventricle!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMindy

For a communist dictator, he really is very sweet on the inside.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdswillis99

For a communist dictator, he really is sweet on the inside.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRoonie

"Next year, can I have a dead cancer rat instead of a dead russian cake?"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPetalsYoga

Daaad, I wanted a piece of his chin!

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

She's saying

"I get the wishbone!!!"

I think the little girl looks like she's about to throw up on the cake. I know I would.

"Daddy... Daddy... why are you cutting that man's head open?"

I can SO see that kid doing her first animal dissection in school. "Teacher, why doesn't this frog taste like cake? Lenin did!"

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjustme

ew! i don't want any blood on mine!!

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterluna

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