My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

May the 4th Be With You...

...or at least with this cake:

"Sad of September" sends his regards.

Ask not what your country can do for you... [eyebrow waggle]

Not ok, man. Not ok.

Of course, some bakers don't need words to show their true colors:

Ah, the good ol' red, blue, white, and black.

No, wait. I can't do it. I can't just move on to the next cake. I tried - I really did - but I just can't. I'm afraid this calls for a Jen Rant. Sorry.

Here goes.


Seriously, Wreckerator? SERIOUSLY? This is what you're calling an "American flag," to be sold here IN America, and for America's birthday, no less? I mean, really? Red and BLUE stripes? Black stars? REALLY? Have you no shame? No patriotic pride? No...


Um. What is that?

Ok. Never mind. This is worse.

Now, what do you say we go out with a bang?

Theeeere it is.

Amber E., Carol S., Sarah C., Christina P., Robert I., Hillary H., & Jennifer, I don't know about you, but my confidence in these wreckerators seems to be flagging.

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Reader Comments (109)


July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

Years ago (think the late 60's - early 70's) our family (read my mother) thought it was fun to use sparklers instead of candles on cakes. And it was. Sort of.

Until . . .

You started to eat the cake and got crunchy bits in the frosting from where the sparkler stuff embedded itself into the frosting.

We did it for a dear friend and burned holes in her Irish lace tablecloth. Fortunately, she laughed.

WV: zygondef - zygondef from the firework bangs!

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterladyqkat

...last one iced by a frustrated male baker?

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Man! at least Canada was able to spell their country's NAME! Today, I am embarrassed to be an Amerikan.

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterT

My daughter goes to school with a girl named "Amerika" (same spelling). Maybe that was her birthday cake...? I'm trying to be an optimist here, I really am.

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercyn

Quite a lot of bang for the buk.

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersteph

That last 'cake' -- stick a candle in it. It's done.

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermsyendor

personally i'd like to see the original concept behind the patriotic phallus... cause i doubt even these wreckarators came up with that one on their own...

The patriotic phallus could possibly have been for someone without of control hormimmi... just a thought?

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLissy

Clearly the last cake is a tribute to the recent blooming of the Corpse Flower in Berkeley, CA [ ]

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKristers

That "bang" cupcake?


WV:eyses These wrecks hurt my eyses.

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSuzanne

What makes the last one worse is the fact that the one behind it (the rose and the butterfly) is absolutely could someone make something so beautiful one moment and something so horrible the next?

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I would, perhaps like to believe that the Amerika birthday cake is for a beautiful young woman, HOWEVER, if that is the case, why would it be out in the open for a cake wreck-porter to snap its photo and submit to Jen, it should be reserved for whomever ordered it behind the counter, ready to go for the orderee... And I cannot actually believe that the orederee would snap the pic and submit it, if it were actually what they ordered...

As for the comments of the phallic attempt at a firework, well... All I can say is each comment seriously needs the option of a 'like' button just like on facebook, there were far too many that had me nodding in agreement, in between hiccups of giggles

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterB-Jo

Maybe the bakers were Canadian. If you don't know that Canada Day exists, how are they supposed to know what your flag looks like? ;)

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

You know, I actually had to look up the American flag after seeing that first flag cake. AFTER SEEING THIS CAKE I COULD NOT REMEMBER WHAT THE AMERICAN FLAG LOOKED LIKE.

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

c'mon people. those aren't black STARS.

those are CAT CRUNCHIES!!

and, really. about that last cake...

before we all make judgments, just remember:


July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRenee

I'm pretty sure the "Happy Birthday Amerika" one is for a kid named Amerika...

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The flags were enough to make me sputter but the Bang! cupcake ... OH... MY... GOD. So much frosting. I can't see, gone blind. And diabetic.

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelanie

I think the Happy Birthday one was really for a little girl named Amerika. No chance could that REALLY be a fourth of July cake. Right?

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRachael

I read the second one as 'stare and strips' :o)

CCCs - you should really admire the fact that they always, but always, come up with ideas that continue to make you go ptooie....i mean, they do work hard to keep up the standards expected of them!

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterVK

I don't know if the happy birthday one is a true wreck. I had a kid in one of my classes once named Amerika. She was born on July 4th and her mom thought it was cute. No lie.

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm assuming the "Amerika" cake is a legit birthday cake for a girl named Amerika. That aside, these were horrible! haha.

July 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermegan

Holy Cupcakes, those are so sad. LOL!

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMad Izatie

How would one go about eating that cupcake with the huge penis shape and the bang on it? Oh my brain went somewhere it shouldn't and now I have to go hunt it down and clean it up from the gutter lol. I would hope that the wreckerator who can't spell America has run out of town.. that's just horrible.

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

The second to last is actually the American flag as interpreted by Van Gogh.

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAoibhgreine

I don't think #5 is nearly as bad as #4.

It is at least made of separate CCs, rather than being frosted as a single CCC.

I'm sure there are six-year-olds who might get the stripes wrong, starting with white instead of red. They'd get the stars wrong too, and getting them right would actually be a challenge given the tools used.

The curve is obviously supposed to suggest it's waving in the wind.

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ok, that last one was so wrong on sooo many different levels...

Um... so I recently got your book. And um... aw what am I saying? It ws hilarious! So yeah. Just saying that you're awesome.

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChaos6267

Oh God...that last one hurts in ways I can't describe T_T

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Reading "Stars and Strips" makes me wonder if some techie out there is trying to figure out how to make a piping bag with a spell checker! Ad campaign: Don't let your next project be starred on "Cake Wrecks" - use Typo-Free Piping Bags!

Happy 4th...of July, everyone!

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

looks yummy and yeah happy bday america..:0

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteriamronel

happy 4th of july..i want those cake they're pretty much awesome

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered

Dang. Stars and Strips Forever. THAT'LL get the party started!!

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSweet Peach

Dear CakeWrecks,

I've been following the site for a few months now, and I just wanted to thank you. Whenever I have a bad day at work (which is usually pretty freakin' frequently), I come to this site and giggle until I can't breathe. It's probably one of the few things keeping me sane.

Happy 4th, everyone!

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLibrarianInTraining

Alien Schlong.

We definitely have a Wreckerator that was abducted recently trying to recover from the experience in the only way they know how, through icing and cupcakes.

WV: kiests
The wreckerator shouldn't kiests and tell.

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Fauve

Wow. Well the Canada Day cakes made me a bit embarrassed to be Canadian...but at least a maple leaf is actually difficult to draw! How do you mess up an American flag? For shame!

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCarolyn

What the... THAT's a flag? Wow. Bad skills.

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChaos6267

I would like to add one other thing to your rant on the American flag cake:

"A WHITE canton*? It's supposed to be BLUE, damn it!"

*Canton: On the American flag, it's the field on which the stars are placed.

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJanus

OMG! When I saw the second cake I thought it said:

....inappropriate?! :)

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterScarlett Robyn

#4 was so bad it made me forget what an American flag looked like.


July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMorgan

this is a horrible post. haha, good on your part, bad on the cake decorators parts. HORRIBLE.

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKelli

Some of these things are a waste of ingredients.

As for the last one... [blink] What sort of bakery is that, anyway? The Fireman Cake looks downright innocent next to this!

Were the blue squiggles added as an afterthought? If so, they didn't help matters much. Who thought a bakery would be a place where parents would have to answer awkward questions?!

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

LOL these were terrible! Happy 4th of July everyone (and 4 year anniversary to us!)

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJill

Hee hee ha ha hoo hoo ha ha hoo HOO HA HA HA HA OH my! Thanks for the good laugh today.

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNatalie

These cake are some of the best, uh, worst ever. I could not believe the cake with black stripes. Looks like a 2-year-old made it.

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterB Spidey

Those "stars" look suspiciously like animal kibble...

July 3, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterthe dark ferret

Whenever I go to my local grocery store, I always cruise through the bakery looking for wrecks. I found one...small cake with a flag. Blue background, white stars *check*, but then red, white, and blue stripe! It was all I could do to keep from grabbing it and showing it to the baker to ask which country's flag was flying on it. I was wearing a flag on my T-shirt at the time.

Sharon's Edible Art

July 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

Geez... nice try but America weeps at these sad tributes lol

check out my blog:

July 5, 2010 | Unregistered Commenter~Nikki~

That CCC isn't an American flag. It's Van Gogh's famous painting "Flaggy Night."

July 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDan

The US flag is one of the most recognizable flags in the world. How could they get it SOOOOOOO wrong?!? I'm a Canadian, so no patriotic bias here :)

LOVE the phallic "boom" cupcake!!! And the, um, "mounds" with stripper-cherries behind it are "icing" on that cake! The comment about how do you eat it nearly killed me :)

I was sold on "Amerika" being a birthday cake until B-Jo's argument-- that's a good point, if it were an ordered cake, it wouldn't have been sent in. Which has me rather worried: isn't spelling America with a K something racist groups do???

July 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

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