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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Sep132010

Bouncing Here And There And EV'rywhere!

"Dashing and daring, courageous and caring,

faithful and friendly with stories to share!


"All through the forest they sing out in chorus,

marching along as their song fills the air!

"Guuummy Beeeears!"

[record screeching to a halt]

*chirp*

*chirp*

Um, thanks, Jordan B.

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Reader Comments (102)

I used to say I liked chocolate in nearly any form... I've stopped now.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChele

It looks like a gummy bear that has been buried in a tomb and has been covered with years and years of spider webs. I think I'll have nightmares about this tonight. Thanks.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

*snort*

Oh, sorry. Grasshopper, you have gone beyond teachings.

Loving the references of various 'what is it' from the comment posters.

*sigh* Not only Gummi Bears, but now Duck Tales floating through my grey matter for the week. Thanks a lot. Yeah. Really.

btw - my favorite gummi bears are the clear ones. No color, no flavor, pure sugar.

~~Di

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hmmm, I watched Alien again last night, and this cake ( do we HAVE to call it a cake?) reminds me of some evil alien spawn.

Again I have to ask, "WHAT were they thinking" or perhaps, "what WERE they thinking" or even, what were they THINKING"????

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterof sage and sepia

Um. Ew?

That said, just what flavor IS a mauve gummi bear? No, wait, maybe I don't want to know.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterladyrazorsharp

Jen - I love you for this post. :) The gummi bear theme song definitely brought back fond memories! Thanks!

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterthe JCU effect
September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCyberjar88

Even Gummi Berri Juice wouldn't wash that taste out of your mouth...

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMeg

Poor thing sorta looks like it's undergoing mitosis! ew..

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think I'm the only one that was disappointed to see that they weren't real gummy bears in that cartoon.

I preferred the Wuzzles anyways.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi D

I love gummi bears. A food you can smush with your fingertips and it will slowly go back to its original shape. No other food does that (that I can think of anyway).

LOL I totally see the plastic explosive gopher from Caddyshack! “Great big gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts”

I don’t have that song in my head, but I do have Ferris Bueller’s Day Off when the girl says to Principal Rooney “Gummi bear? It's been in my pocket; they're real warm and soft.” Maybe this was it?

wv: witiv – Witiv we pretend you didn’t show us this cake?

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hey, I just heard on the news today that you can now get gummi bears laced with LSD. Scary.

WV: I chaysid my blues away with new LSD gummi bears.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Did that gummi bear fall into a mud pit?

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Black Dog

@mimi You know, The Disney Afternoon should be revived so The Adventures of the Chocolate Goo would gross us out!

WV - chesseme
I got cheesed already not only because this year marks the 20th anniversary of The Disney Afternoon, where The Adventures of the (Real) Gummi Bears were featured, even if they were made 5 years before that block we 90's kids remembered watching.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Whiz Kid Forte

My son just walked by the computer and asked, "what is that? a turd?"

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMim

Thought at first it was gonna be "El Paso" by Marty Robbins..which really made me wonder WTF the Wreck was supposed to be...

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermizdarlin

I second Katja... That really is unfortunate. The poor cake. The poor person who ordered the cake. Oh, the poor world of cakedom.

wv - noutani: "How much of this cake would you like" "Noutani, thank you. It looks like something my dog horked up last night."

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

Looks like something that, due to some horrible malformation, didn't make it past the fetal stage before it was...um...expelled.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjanet2buns

Ok, I already had that song stuck in my head this morning. It's like you're reading my mind! Stop it!

How weird, though, that you blogged about the children's tv theme song that I've been humming this morning.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTiciaLicious

Looks more like a kitty to me. That cake is truly a Rorschach test!

That one terrible looking cake. I can admit that at least it looks like it might be roughly the right shape and may have been improved if the decorator added icing details.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

It is done? It looks like someone should do something to finish it like clothe it or put a face on it. Ugh!

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterVTIS4ME!

Don't ask me why, but for some reason I read that to the tune of "These Are a Few of My Favorite Things."

Are you sure that thing isn't some horrible flesh eating monster that grew out of the toxic waste stored beneath the floorboards, and it just acidently surface during a bake sale?

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

HAHA I had this song in my head on Thursday. My student worker wanted gummy bears out of the vending machine, so I found the song on YouTube and made him listen to it.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMeganB

Ha! I loved the Gummy Bears show!! Children of the 80's.... UNITE!!

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKayleen

The song took me back to joyful days of bounding off the school bus to catch the beginning of Gummy Bears, and wondering just exactly what gummy berry juice tastes like...

and then that cake ripped my heart out through my belly.

Damn!

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTees

Technically, Play-Doh *is* edible. About as appetizing as this..."cake".

It looks more like Silly Putty, though, maybe even plumber's putty.

Wreckerator had a previous job at
(a) Toys 'R' Us
(b) The Home Depot
(c) pottery shop
(d) other

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJohn

To those that are old enough to remember...it looks more like a much used fuzzy wuzzy bathsoap. (He definately was't very fuzzy was he?) karen

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

looks like stillborn bear or science experiment bear

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Must've been a really bad batch of Gummiberry juice!

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterL.B.

ROTFLOL - I was totally singing the Gummi Bears song right out loud, cheerfully earning myself a cross look from the hubs, when I scrolled down and . . . well THAT happened. Fortunately I read the comments, so now I have "Ducktales" with which to amuse myself. Yay

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLis

Might I recommend a "Gummy Bear Cocktail" to go along with it?

I actually invented this in honour of my father when he died. I am sure he would have appreciated the scientific principal being employed with it and been suitably grossed out but the entire concept... It was perfect. I could imagine him going "bleacccchhhh" but drinking it because I made it.

Gummy Bear Cocktail
4-5 Gummy Bears (more or less, as desired)
1 beer, in a glass (more or less, as desired)

Pour the beer and drop the Gummy Bears in.

Just like the classic "ginger-ale and raisins" science experiment, the bears will rise and fall within the beer as the carbon dioxide bubbles form and break on the surface of the bears.

And it doesn't taste gross because the bears don't actually impart any flavour to the beer.

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnneke (Mudhooks)

Umm does that thing look like an alien ate it's face to you? It did to me and boy with the song and that..shudder.. thing staring at me I now will be up for days drinking coffee and wishing I could find the wreckerator lol. Two songs came to mind and My Favorite Things seems to be winning..help me.. lol

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

You're scaring the children, Jen.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterearthquakesandrattlesnakes

Did you see the Steampunk wedding cake by Christopher Garren's Let Them Eat Cake? It was on "Amazing Wedding Cakes" on WeTV. It was phenomenal... epic, even!! I tried to find a photo, but couldn't. I did find their FB page, though, and they have Steampunk doors for their new addition to their shop. You have to check it out!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShelley Parker Chandler

I miss watching the Disney channel when Gummi Bears, Duck Tales, and Tale Spin were shown one right after the other. D;

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJen

Good grief! Oh Dear! Dear Lordy! That is a coke cummy bear gone bad.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commentershikishinobi

Maybe some Gummy Berry Juice will help this cake?

.....Doubtful.

But now my day will be plagued with the song.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCarly Wiegers

I think the person who suggested the C-4 gopher is absolutely right. It had to have been a special order, and the wreckerator got it just right.

In any other case, the cake matched my WV: glyched.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterelissa

It looks like some sort of alien egg-sack that's about to burst; and whatever climbs out of it is about to start biting holes in our skulls and sucking out the contents.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHungarican Chick

OMG, that cake just shouldn't exist, or be out in public for a crowd to see. I haven't heard the theme song for Gummy Bears since I was a kid. I used to watch that cartoon all the time.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@Sam Gamgee
Nice Princess Bride reference... another 80s classic :)

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth C.

Daaaaaaaang yooooouuuuu!! *hums the song endlessly* What a song to have stuck in my head when I start work in an hour.
.... I remember all the words, too. Kinda scary.

But no, that is not a gummy bear. That is.... I can't even think of anything to describe that.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeatherM

http://www.gotoorder.com" rel="nofollow">Ed Hardy Jeans,it is very popular.

September 15, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjea

Whyyyyy would one do the only thing you could possibly to do to ruin an otherwise nicely-shaped gummi bear, and frost it in the least appetizing colour on the planet??

September 15, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

Re: the "B.A.D. Day" post on Epbot -- this one definitely helped me out today. Thanks. The comic timing was awesome.

September 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

...maybe it's a headless Venus of Willendorf?

Yeeeah, I got nothing.

September 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterksaldria

I actually have that cake mold. I, too, made a brown bear, but with the appropriate finishing decorations it can actually look like a teddy bear. I never noticed the gummi bear resemblance until you pointed it out. =)

September 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This was awesome because I got really, really into the song as I was reading it. And when it got to "GUMMY BEARS!" I was totally pumped, and then...just...disappointed. You did a good job here. It made me happy. (Also, I know that song in Swedish. I don't speak a word of Swedish, but I can sing the Gummibears theme in it.)

September 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEdana

I guess the brown gummy bear went the way of the tan M&M. They were too poo-rific.

September 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Because of this post, I looked up the song and had it stuck in my head all day... thank you.

September 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSami

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