My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

So Hard to Say Goodbye

"Hi, bakery? I'd like to order a blue and white cake that says 'Bon Voyage, Charlie."

"Well, that's not exactly right. There's a 'V' in 'Bon Voyage.' But it's no problem. I can wait for the corrections to be made."



"Uhh.... well, I see that you've thrown a 'V' in there, but it's still not correct. 'Voyage' is spelled 'V-O-Y-A-G-E.' And his name is not Brian. Again, just a simple blue and white cake."


"Well, you finally spelled 'Bon Voyage' right, but maybe I haven't made myself totally clear. I don't want any drawings. What is... is that a bleeding cauliflower? Listen, I just want a plain white cake. In blue icing, I want 'Bon Voyage, Charlie.' Nothing else. Plain. Simple."


*sigh* "I appreciate your enthusiasm on this try, but it's still wrong. Please, just blue writing on a white cake. 'Bon Voyage, Charlie.' No extra colours. Just the writing. PLEASE."



"I don't even know who that guy is."



"Are you even listening to me?"



"We're not having much luck here. Let's just forget 'Bon Voyage' all together. Can you please just write 'Goodbye!' on a plain cake?"



"I'll take it."



On behalf of Randi H., Melissa S., Dennis W., Lindsay A., Valerie S., Lauren L., and Liz- we genuinely wish Charlie good luck on his trip. May there be no bleeding cauliflower on his flight.


« Bum Voyage | Main | Bouncing Here And There And EV'rywhere! »

Reader Comments (89)

I thought it was a bleeding cotton boll myself...

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonkaloosa

What's up with all those cakes with voyage starting with a B!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAberdonian

Now, see, I've never seen "voyage" misspelled with a B. Yet you found not one but two spelled "boyage". Same bakery?

I'll wait for the nerds to comment so I can find out what that bleeding cauliflower/cotton boll/football mum thing is. A Star Trek/Star Wars/Indiana Jones theme cauliflower?

And I'd take the sprinkles cake, even misspelled. It's pretty.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

Star Trek's "A Piece of the Action" cake is actually kind of geeky-cool...if someone hadn't defaced it with the horrid red writing! One of my favorite episodes, aside from the tribbles. Wait! Hold the presses! THAT'S A BLEEDING TRIBBLE!!!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

Has someone been reading 27b/6 cos you sound a lot like the cat lady!

Love you (And 27B/6 actually) lots!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStarry

that was a really colourful and busy cake!

on another note, why cant the bakeries just post a huge sign with the correct spelling of popular phrases...

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertiny purple elephant

Maybe "Bon Boyage" was supposed to be a pun of some kind?

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

hahahah, "boyage". That crackes me up

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDazee Dreamer

Notice the "Bon Voyge" on that red/blue/yellow flowers cake. :P

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRafael

I think the bleeding cottonball has to do with the episode where Kirk passed off Spock's ears by saying he got his head stuck in a cotton-picker as a child. I can't remember if taht was A Piece of the Action or The City on the Edge of Forever.

...I need to go buy lots of girly things like shoes and purses and superfluous scented lotions to reassert my femininity.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterM

Okay - I can settle the bleeding cauliflower controversy.

It is a flying piece of cotton from the Tinkerbell movie. She makes a balloon out of cotton using her pixie dust to fly over Neverland to find the magic mirror to make a wish and get back her broken moonstone for her septor before the Autumn Revelry.

What? I have a two year old.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMissy

I suspect we need to don 3D glasses to view the fourth cake down properly.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJamie

"Bon Boyage." Hmm, since "bon" is good, then are they wishing someone to have a good time in their boy ages? (Like, before they become a teenager?) Or more saying that they have good masculinity?

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Did anyone else see MEL B's show on Style the other night? Her husband order a cake for her daughter's graduation and told them that he wanted "PHOENIX" in the middle. What they got was "PHOENIX IN THE MIDDLE." I immediately thought of Cake Wrecks!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRoo

Bleeding cauliflower does not concern me. What is that black and green thing on the last cake? THAT concerns me.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSherri

"Bon Boyage"?

sounds like a well-wishing for someone going on a "Find A Hubby" cruise! ;)

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRenee H.

The trouble with tribbles is that they bleed profusely, when shot by Al Capone.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterslowdown

holy cow! that's THREE that spell it BOYAGE... I don't know if you wanna talk about what sort of cruise that might be..

and the one spelled Voyge-- the multicolored one, it also looks like it's 3D!! Like one of those magic eye pictures.. it's scaring me quite a bit, actually!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterstaxia

1) did cake #4 come w/ 3d glasses?

2) i am pretty sure a plain blue & white cake w/ "Bon Boyage" is what they got George Reckers before his trip last spring

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Perhaps the bleeding cauliflower was an attempt at the cover of the Twilight book - you know, the one with the flower dipped in blood?

What that has to do with Star Trek and machine guns, I'm not sure... but it's my best guess. :)

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda Mac

You know, I think Donna is right, the Star Trek cake does look like it's supposed to represent the classic episode "A Piece of the Action." At first I couldn't figure out what was up with the bleeding cotton ball, but maybe it's supposed to be a carnation, like the gangsters wore on their lapels. The bleeding is a bit much, since the show was back in the 60's and they didn't show much blood, but there was a fair amount of mowing guys down with tommy guns.

The horrible red writing really wrecks what otherwise is a kind of cool cake.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBarbW

But "A Piece of the Action" doesn't feature tribbles, cauliflower or cotton balls, right? Check.

See, if you stare hard (until your eyes dry out and everything gets blurry) it kind of looks like a cloudy planet, and the green thing is a Romulan warbird firing plasma weapons. Try squinting. And tilting your head to the side. and drinking. Still not seeing it? Well, at least you have an excuse for drinking.

The recipient of this cake is just lucky the wreckerator didn't try to design "A Pizza Reaction".

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJohn

Pretty sure that was supposed to be a cotton plant with blood dripping off it. I don't really get the connection with the jumbled mess of pics, but I do think that's what that was.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I read these everyday and consider stealing them and putting them on my own blog. I'd include a link to your blog of course.

But then the people who read MY blog would find YOUR blog and they'd never come back to me.

In fact, I think that's how I found you, I clicked on some link somewhere and never went back to where ever that was.

Thank you for allowing me to share the mind games I have to live with everyday.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary Connealy

"I'll take it." When I read THAT line under THAT cake . . . omigad I'm still cracking up! I'm gonna laugh about that all day. Thank you SO much!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Bon "Boyage" - good lord! Don't you think you might wonder what on earth "boyage" means and CHECK??!!

And what are the black blobs on the "Bon Boyage, Brian" cake??

I snorted out my coffee about the "bleeding cauliflower"!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdeb

Yeah, I was thinking cotton ball, too. The sad thing was I actually found myself spending like 10 minutes trying to figure out if it was some sort of picture rebus--"hmmm, trek-gun cotton-hat. No, ship-gun boll-hat. Naw . . ." before realizing that I was completely wasting my time.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's a shame about the bleeding cauliflower (or whatever the heck that is); the Enterprise and the Starfleet logo are actually pretty good!

The rest...0_o

And black icing should be outlawed. FOREVER.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterladyrazorsharp

See, "Boyage" is what a young fellow has in between infancy and adulthood, so for somebody's third birthday, you could wish him a "Bon Boyage."

Actually, I suspect that the "Boyage" cakes were decorated by people whose native language is Spanish. In Spanish, "b" and "v" represent the same sound, so Spanish speakers often confuse the two letters when they write, especially if it's an unfamiliar word. "Bon voyage" in Spanish is "Buen Viaje," by the way (or, I guess you could write it "Vuen Biaje," although I've never seen it that way.

WV: peristed. No matter how many times the baker tried, spelling errors peristed.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Here are some definitions for "boyage":

WV: beddudar...My Cake Wreck is beddudar than yours!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenteranotherJuli

And people wonder why our high school kids have so much trouble with standardized tests...makes me want to break out the flash cards for my three year old and start working on vocabulary!

wv atstrac = a cake so confusing in meaning it is beyond abstract. Like yesterday's "bear" (and the quotation marks are totally justified!).

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterI mean come on, really?

Where is Mike GOING?

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNYCGirl

By the time I got to the last one, I was so spell-shocked that I didn't even notice it said "goodbay."

@Rafael: I notice that. That makes it sound Yiddish. Oy, bon voygeh!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous


Ok, now that I can breathe...

A bleedin' cotton boll?? Really?? I don't even want to go there.

Seriously, the 'boyage' or 'voyge' are bad enough, but what the heck is with the black flowers?

It's a good thing I check this blog at home, by myself, all alone. Otherwise, people might think I was a bit crazy laughing at my screen. Oops, too late.

Thanks for all the good times. And bleedin' cotton bolls.

Poor Spock.


wv - artozy -- stop getting so blamed artozy with the cake already!! White, blue icing - Bon Voyage, already!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I agree with "M" -- in "A Piece of the Action" Spock's pointed ears are passed off as being the result of an accident with a cotton picking machine. I think that really is a bleeding cotton ball!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNekussa

If you put on those red and blue 3D glasses the fourth cake comes out right at you. B)

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMaru

My guess is the decorators who wrote "Boyage" were native Spanish speakers. "V" is pronounced like "B" in Spanish. Or the person ordering the cake was a native Spanish speaker and the decorator was just giving them what they asked for!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh my gosh, bleeding cauliflower is exactly what I thought when I saw that cake! I was going to call it as such in the comments. It pleases me that I had the same thought as someone so witty!

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think it's a cotton ball, but I don't think that makes any more sense at all. Whatsoever." rel="nofollow">

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKate

I gotta tell you, I started to order a cake over the phone about a year ago after I started reading Cake Wrecks and I wanted "Bon Voyage" on it. I quite literally had nearly the same phone conversation and after the third attempt, I had a vision of this cake at the top of your post the next week. I gave up and ordered "Good Job." Maybe I don't really deserve to read Cake Wrecks. ;)

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

OMG, this totally reminds me of the last episode of "Will and Grace"
Jack is in a TV show called "The Badge" so Karen has a huge posted made for him. It comes back saying the Vadge. Karen says, "hhhmmm, maybe I should have said 'b' as in boy instead of 'b' as in bagina."

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLiesl

The trim on the first cake appears to be airbrushed blue. Are they really lazy enough to not tint their frosting?

(WV: insidebt. The bakery who employs all these wreckerators will soon be insidebt.)

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMorgi

With commentary that good, I forget about the hideous cakes. Well done!

WV: solikliz - Oh, I can't even go there.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

what the hail was that second one? Star Trek meets the Godfather meets The Color Purple?

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterandygirl

Ok,here is my theory on the "Bon Boyage" cakes. The sound of "b" and "v" is very similar in languages like Tagalog and Spanish. I'm guessing the common thread that accounts for the same mistake being made multiple times is that the decorators have one of these or similar languages as their first language.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAng

I seriously want to look at the blue and red one (with sprinkles!) with 3d glasses on. I think it would only add to the terror.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterIsabella

@ Starry, I checked out that link and I almost had Coke (the soda, not the powder) coming through my nose. Thanks for posting. And thanks CQ for the great post today. I needed the laugh after dealing with my H.O.A.

Hmmm, maybe I should try a cake letter (like the cake invoice) when dealing with them, the cake might soften the blow of my stinging sarcasm...

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterElisabeth

Well, I'm French Canadian and as far has I know "boyage" doesn't mean anything. It only make me think of "boyeau" that you can translate by "guts, entrails"... Yummy!

Urband Dictionary offer this explanation:

"Visit to see a boyfriend or fling, requiring plane, train or automobile, and therefore more time and effort intensive than the average booty call.

As she left for the airport for a weekend of passion with her 'sometimes' man in Chicago, her friends wished her a 'bon boyage!'"

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I hate to state the obvious, but the 'b/v' confusion was probably made by a native Spanish speaker. They often pronounce the letter 'V' as if it were a 'B'.

But funny still that the owner, cashier, delivery person, etc. all let that slip by.

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJillian

All I have to say is 'Bleeding Cauliflower Controversy' would make a good name for a rock band.

And I'm still waiting for an answer ...

September 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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