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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Sep012011

NOOOOOO!!!

Poor Darth Vader. He used to be the baddest of the bad guys, the deadliest dad, and the grumpiest force-choker around. Over the years, however, he's been reduced to a cuddly bear, a Hello Kitty parody, and a really excellent dancer.

Adding to the indignity, George Lucas has now added even more "tweaks" to the original Return of the Jedi which has the Internet on FIRE with all of geekdom up in arms. Most lampooned was the addition of a rather entertaining Vader yell, which has been described as "ridiculous," "undignified," and "Dude, it's a yell. What's the big deal?"

Well, never fear, fellow fans! I'm here to help.

In fact, I promise you'll never think that yell is undignified again.

Compared to these.


NOOOOOOO....

OOOOOO.....

OOOOOOO....

Oh. Actually, this one's not so bad - since it's plastic and all. I just find it funny to imagine Vader using contractions. Go on, say it in your head. "LUKE I'M YOUR FATHER." No? Just me?

 

Right, moving on.

[Inhale]

....OOOOOOOOOO!!!!

 

 

 A grateful force-choke to Timbrely, Clare, Julie Anne D., Annie L., Arielle C., and Brenda J. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to watch the Vader TomTom commercial again. That thing cracks. me. up.

« We Have A "Winner"! | Main | "Head" Lines »

Reader Comments (94)

That last one is scary. Sort of black Ewok with a bit of skeletor!

Shudder!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJenny Allworthy

Those are wrong on so many levels.....

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMINDY1

Is there no justice in this world?

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGretchen

I've found this site to be appropriate on more than one occasion -- and it's perfect for this post!

http://nooooooooooooooo.com/

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJoAnna

oh the inhumanity of it all! *hanging and shaking my head*

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

You've gone to the dark side of the frosting. I especially like the 3rd cake, which looks like Darth had a love child with a walrus. ("Luke, this is your half-brother.")

The Tom Tom ad was great -- they also had a link to the Yoda rendition ("Turn left you must.") I'm never going to be able to say round-about again.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Those Vader cakes are scarier than Vader himself *shudder*

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJabby

http://nooooooooooooooo.com/

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

That second one totally looks like a Harry Potter House-elf!!!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNaantje

Isn't that what he said, told Luke he was his father?

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDorothy

I am one of those geeks who is up in arms about the change, yet I know that I will be buying the Blu Rays. All the changes really make you wonder what kind of movie would have been made had the evil demon-spawn intent on destroying my childhood (that would be Mr Lucas) had the budget and computers to make the movie he apparantly really wanted to make.

Vader screaming no takes away the characters dignity and the gravitas of the scene.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Somehow with the contractions, it makes me prone to misreading it as "Like, I'm your father."

Darth "Valley Girl" Vader

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

DO NOT WANT!!!!

(Any of these cakes. Or the dubbed-in Vader yell in RotJ)

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterShanti

I agree. I said it at least 3 times and every time my brain corrected I'm with I am.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJess

We say "roundabound" every time we come to one. LOVE that commercial!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKristi

Is it just me, or does the last Darth Vader look a bit, well, Ewok-ish?
In any case, NOOOOOOOOOOO...

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnne-with-an-e

My favorite Darth Vader spoof is the Eddy Izzard Death Star Canteen bit done with legos. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sv5iEK-IEzw

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPoodleDoodle

LOVE that one is an Ewok and one is a Yoda. That Vader really got around....

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSylph

I think the third one must be Dr. Zoidberg's never before seen cousin on Futurama.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTrista

Thanks! I needed a good laugh today! I have the Yoda voice on my TomTom. It only got a little weird when he was speaking over the radio playing the theme to Ghostbusters... Don't cross the streams! Geek apoplexy!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTracy O

Are these the results of putting Darth Vader's helmet in a kilm or something? The blue one looks like emo-vader (cake number 3). Just as long as they don't try to replica Princess Leia's hairstyle from 'A New hope,' we should be relatively safe.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered Commentershikiblade

Maybe the last one was just Wicket playing with the Vader mask after Luke tried to burn it? Because, if so, then it's AWESOME! Lord Wicket, the Ewok Sith Lord.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterIsabella

The 3rd looks like Darth Basset Hound.
He's the world's only evil Basset.
Makes me want to do an all-dog parody of Star Wars, actually.
Luke would have to be a chihuahua, though. LIttle and whiny.
Chewy already looks like a sheepdog.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLizardisaNerd

I think that last one was made by someone who has been living in a cave for the past 34 years and therefore has no idea what Darth Vader actually looks like. They created the cake based solely on a description.

Yeah, that has to be it...

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTrekkie Gal

The 2nd one reminds me of Stewie's Darth Vader from Family Guy!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHaggles

Star Wars voices for your GPS?! I didn't even know such a thing existed! I'm going to have to buy a TomTom now.

I'm not sure why, but the last one reminds me of some sort of artifact you'd see on Ancient Aliens that some "legitimate" professor or researcher claims can't possibly be anything other than a replica of aliens that visited our ancestors.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMay

Turn left at the roundabound... (win!)

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermichelej

Thank you Jen! Not only for the wrecks but for the link to the Tom Tom videos.
Tears running down my face, they are!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMaggi

I know what the last one reminds me of! Whistler's Mother!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermcranny

Not to mention he plays a mean salsa trombone:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07IhWD2Lr2A

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdrumnate

lmbo!! Sharyn, I'm with you - it will always be "round-abound"
I love Vader doing his own theme song.
"You left keep must" hahaha.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSabriam

If Vader actually looked like cake #3, the whole "nooooo" thing would be much more fitting.

The advantage of cakes as an art form lies in their impermanence. If you make a really excellent, tasty, good-looking cake, you can't go back twenty (and twenty-seven, and thirty-four, and thirty-eight...) years later and "fix" it. Any "improvements" a doddering old hack baker wants to add, would require making an entirely new cake. Nothing can besmirch the memory of that first good cake.

Han shot first, dagnabbit!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

Are you sure that third one isn't a shih tzu puppy? Cause it sure looks a lot more like one than Darth Vader.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStacy

Don't forget Darth Tater! (has one sitting on her desk)

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRenee Marie Jones

I may not want any of those cakes, but I sure do want a TomTom now!! And then I want to travel somewhere with a roundabound.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJasry

I put Yoda on my TomTom last year when it came out. My BF and I have a lot of fun with it on trips. The one that always cracks us up....Obi Wan comes on and says "You must use caution" and Yoda yells (in the most irritated voice I've ever heard) "Concentrate!"

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAshley

All I could think was something along the lines of "Go to an orthodontist you must." Black dentures nooooooooo.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRev W

That last one reminds me of ancient Mayan statuary. Considering the Mayans' fondness for blood sacrifices, if I found that cake on my plate I'd run screaming from the room ...

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJules

Oh my. The force needs to bit$h slap these people.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJaclynn

Have you guys seen Chad Vader yet?!?! It is a show, you can find episodes on Hulu. It is pretty freakin hilarious. Just making sure my favorite nerds know about it! Hope you guys have an amazing weekend at *DC!!!!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterValerie

"Luke, bro, I'm totes yer dad."

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMona

Not just you. Vader can't use contractions. Don't be ridiculous!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterErin

I don't know, is it just me? But I kind of enjoyed watching Darth and his storm troopers doing Hammer Time. The cakes? Can't touch this.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJackie

That first one is Lilo's buddy Stitch, right?

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

Whatever, make the Ewoks blink, it's not going to upset the scene. Adding "no, NOOOOOO" to Darth Vader throwing the Emperor over the side of the thingy? That's not cool, not cool at all my friends.

I'm glad that I have the original movies on DVD. I don't need Blu Ray if that's what they're going to do with my beloved childhood memories. I have children for crying out loud! I have a responsibility to them to raise them right and show them the proper versions of Star Wars. I have by the way. It was awesome to watch them react to the movies. When the Emperor was thrown down the shaft my girls jumped up in celebration. Proud parenting moments. ::sigh::

They are well balanced geeklings. My oldest is currently loving Dr. Who, she's 13. My youngest just went to 6th grade this year (middle school) She said she saw a girl with a triforce shirt and thought that she would make a good friend. When she said that it brought a tear to her fathers eyes.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi D

I don't know why, but I laughed so hard watching the Vader Hammer dance that I started crying.
I laughed so hard at the Yoda Tom Tom video that I peed my pants.
I should see a doctor about that. I think I'm leaking.
Lucas should have replaced the Williams soundtrack with Vader doing all the music.

Lots of stunned silence in response to those cakes. Apart from the white noise which I'm sure was my brain melting trying to comprehend 1,2,3 and 5.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPuppygirl

::looks at third cake::

I didn't realise they had seals in Star Wars.

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAndreaClaire

My 4 year old son just saw your blog for the 1st time and said "those are naked babies riding on carrots!!" Yes, dear, those are babies on carrots. :0/

Thank you for the TomTom links. My two boys and I were cracking up!!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLatinmama

the last one looks like a cross between Lord Vader and Mary, Queen of Scots!

September 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterVictoria

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