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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Oct192012

Err Supply

I know just how to ice it


And I know just how to sell


I know just how to read instructions


And I know just how too spell!


I know how to make a moose head

 

And I know how to make a bear


 I know just how to write "Amurersary"


And I know what to do with hair!


And I know just how to stack cake...


And I know when I've gone too far!

AND I'M PROBABLY GONNA CHARGE YOU EVEN THOUGH IT TOPPLED OVER 'CAUSE I REALLY HAVE TO PAY FOR MY CAR!

 

 But I don't think you should judge me

 
Just because it's hard to read my scra-ah-awl...

 

'Cuz you know I'll always be here

Making caa-aake

Look like nothing at all

{Making cake!}

 

Look like nothing at all

{Making ca-ay-ake!}

 

Look like nothing at all

Ahhh-awwww-AH!

 Ahhhh-awwww-AH!

 AHHHHHH!!

 AHHHHHH!!!

 
THIS LOOKS LIKE NOTHING AT ALL!

 

Thanks to Kimberly M., Justine T., Kate L., Lauren B., Krista K., Beth W., Meghan M., Margaret, Amy C., Anony M., Fred M., Kris D., Beth, Kate H., & Chelsea V. for helping us write the longest CW post in CW history.

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Reader Comments (90)

Awesome as usual! Is it just me or is the next to last one Jayne's cap? And, someone please tell me, what is the third last supposed to be? The one with the flowers.. and eggs...?

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLaneyLovesCW

I had to buy a big sheet cake last night, and I really was hoping to see how they could mess up writing "Happy Retirement" on it. Sadly, no one was working who could do the writing, so the cake came to work bear --- then promptly fell out of my trunk when I got to work. Sigh... I don't need pros to mess up a cake for me, I'm quite capable of doing it myself! Love the Err Supply!

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDonkaloosa

I think the reduced Walmart cake (14th picture) is supposed to be a Jayne hat. Poor Jayne!

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered Commenternormajean

Also, great job on the song post, John. I thought it was another guest post by Sharyn at first.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered Commenternormajean

Add a head to the hair cake, and you get a nice wooly AT-AT.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMelody

I'm all out of words. (I'm so lost without them...)

Bravo, John! Great post, and you made me Google a truly cheesy music video I hadn't seen in almost 30 years. (I especially liked the part about paying for the car.)

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

I am a cake decurater and I am tered of beeng judged by piple like yur readers. My cake that you posted looked just fine. I literally wrote what they sed on the cake and it was butiful.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRJ

No thanks to Air Supply?

The bear cake reminds me a little bit of Rosemary Wells and her Max and Ruby style illustrations, which, if that's what they were going for... (scrolls back up for another look)... isn't too far off for buttercream.

The moose cake looks like the ghost of a sheep head with bat wings. A lot of the rest of them... look like nothing at all. Good call!

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMuria

I think the "stacked" one is supposed to look like that.

Distrit.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDavid

Mmmm, shoulder pads!

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKW

Welsh Lady A** Fudge? Really? Really? Does a fail get any better than this?

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSBW

I don't know where to begin this morning, except to say that when it comes to the moosehead cake, now I know what became of Shari Lewis' puppet, Lamb Chop.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterChris

Is that second-to-last one supposed to be a Jayne hat? I'm pretty sure it is...

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKat

These are obviously not "err" cakes, they are "frr" cakes. To which I say–– Frr.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHannah A

It took me until about the middle of the post to get the tune clearly in my head and then I had to go back and read the whole thing while singing along! LOL

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRoseAnn

I used to be a baker/cake decorator, back in the day, and I've been reading your post for a looooooong time. I've never posted before, BUT, today, I must say...I'm laughing so hard there are tears in my coffee. Thank you....thank you.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermamanana

I agree with Kat, I think the next to the last one is supposed to be Jayne Cobb's hat. it's not right in any case.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJamie JO

Nothing at all...best description of these "cakes"!

@Andrea So glad that you got away from Theadare, you brave brave brave woman!

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEla

Didn't I see that Sweet Birthday Bash cake in some Dr. Seuss book?

One wreck. Two wrecks.
Hat wreck. U wreck.
Bear wreck. Moose wreck.
Looks like stew wreck.
Oh how all of them make you go "Blech !!!"

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterChris

You know just how too spell? How do too spell? And what are too, anyway? You know we can't let that slide. ;)

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous Grammar Fascist

I wanna see if the ass fudge cake lives up to its label.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

Just want to say, very nice post, excellent writing! And thanks for the earworm that will be tormenting me all day.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKathryn

The sweet birthday bash stacked cake isn't all that bad (cringes admitting that) the rest of them WTF

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

I also saw a Jayne hat, but maybe there are more Browncoats on this website than in the general population.

The bear looked more like a hamster to me, with his tiny paws. I am sure it was supposed to be a cute, un-scary bear. At least we could tell what they were going for.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCatTrampoline

That's no bear. That's TOTORO! An equally bad Totoro.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterdrumnate

@Andrea - thanks for your advice yesterday about searching for Theadare. I haven't laughed so much in a long time!
The cake that's on sale? I think it's supposed to be a rocket ship. At least, that's what I hope it is. And is there a website to order Welsh Lady Ass Fudge? It sounds so yummy (I almost typed that with a straight face!)

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterbmbagain803

So much to be disturbed by,so little time....
Everything from the 'Fall colors poop' on the first cake to the 'Snorlax' 'bear cake' to all the typos,mistakes and just plain hilarious screwups.
But I like the pastel candy corn.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterThe Former CB

1) If ever an '80's ballad deserved to be wreckerated, that's the one...

2) The wreck above the "bear" isn't a moose. It's the rare and possibly endangered East Upper Sheffield Panda Bat of Doom.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

I don't even....I'm speechless at the talent that's out there.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

One would think that after how many years that this website has been around that cake decorators would clean up their act for fear of showing up as the Wreck of the Day. Alas.. It astounds me that there are so many cakes that can feed the site six days a week.. and many of those days with multiple pictures.

Hm.. No.... You don't suppose that they're doing it on PURPOSE, do you?

Also have to love how some of the comments posted here are (probably) accidental demonstrations as to how cake decorators come to their mistakes.. such as Donkaloosa's line about how the cake went to work "bear".. instead of "bare". :) Heh.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSue

OH THE HUMANITY

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

LOL! My favorite part? You get Clubcard points with the Welsh Lady A** Fudge!

It took me a minute to figure out what 'Distrit' was supposed to be. Hee!

That's not a moose head, it's a BAT-ering RAM! Hahaha. Wait, where are you going?

Huh, have you noticed that cookie cakes are kinda like CCCs (patooie!) in that they are ALL wrecks? I have never seen a cookie "cake" that made me want to buy it. Perhaps (as my son would tell me) that's a personal problem. Hee.

I'm sorry to have to be the one to tell you all this, but that is NO Jayne Cobb hat. It is what's left of Mickey after standing too close to an exploding lava lamp.

Hey, Sharyn, John(thoJ) went to McDonald's for you, cuz You Deserve a Break Today! You know, cuz he wrecked the lyrics. Get it? Ouch. I think I broke something with that one.... : - S

*Sniffle* I miss Craig and Haiku Joy....

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

@Chris: Lol!

@bmbagain803: Glad to be of service!

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

I'm a long time lurker, first time commenter. This post had me laughing all the way through!! I loved that song back in "the day" and u did an awesome job with these wrecks!! LOVE IT!!!!

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoyD

Por beyerr
..."pore bear
He looks sad
he luks loenly
sitting ther
sitting ther
... i wood taek him hoem an eat him
yes i wood
yes i wood.
I woud take him home & eat him
if i cood
if i cood

Please, somebody, which endless daycare song is now stuck in MY head all day? Aaaaaargh...

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergobbler

The one with anniversary spelt wrong is pre-made cake. Comes in just as is and I bet someone wanted it written on and the person said they could try but probably won't come out well. The customer said its fine just try. No one takes no for an answer. Don't say you do because most people won't and then when we said no they get offended. So we say we will try but it probably won't come out good and everyone says its fine and then they complain after. That's how you get cakes like that. So if someone tells you no take it and don't argue because when we say no we really can't do it.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCrissy

Wait... for cake #3, I'm trying to figure out how only putting "Wedding Cake" on it makes it any better. Well, unless it was meant for display as an example and they ran out of sign-making materials to identify what kind it was supposed to be...

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterElizabethB

@Andrea -- Yup, it's like a mini-vacation. And (sniffle) me, too!

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

As I read this, I pictured you typing like you were playing the piano and singing loudly (and off-key, sorry). Please tell me this is accurate.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTracy

I am so excited about this post for 2 reasons:
1 - It is hilarious.
2 - I cannot wait to read what the other clever and witty cakewrecks readers have to say about the last random cakes that look like ?????

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKSLSRocks

Ah Nooo I'll have that song stuck in my head all day! I lol'ed at paying for my car, that HAS to be the reason these wrecks exist.

Chris, thanks for the giggles

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDegera

But the armless gorilla in brightly colored trousers is 40% off! That's rather generous, if you ask me.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnnette

This post and the Air Supply song I had to show her on YouTube made my 12-year-old laugh till she got the hiccups.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSo, um...

I love the bear cake! It's so cute! I want one!

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSurfboard Shark

i'm guessing the Welsh Lady Ass Fudge is actually supposed to be an boxed assortment (or asst) of Fudge, as a quick google search turns up Welsh Lady Fudge that can be bought in England/Wales. But this is a great reminder that you should always be careful with your abbreviations!

I wonder if the giant cookie with white blob & flowers is supposed to be gloved hands holding a bouquet of flowers?

But as for the rest, "bangs head on desk' along with the song...

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDonna`

I think the Jayne hat one is actually meant to be a 'rocket ship'. it never came out well whatever it is :)

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline

WELSH LADY ASS FUDGE! Funniest thing I've heard or seen ALL week! I did the most horrendous spit-take when I saw that Saturday Night Live does good to have one chuckler per week put you guys keep bringing the funny every single day! You Rock!!

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJen @ Cup a Dee Cakes

Seriously could not stop laughing at "Welsh Lady Ass Fudge". That was a great way to start my morning...and now I'm laughing again.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAli

I third the sniffle

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEla

I am embarassed to admit this...but the 2nd to last cake looked to me like a giant candy corn semi-squatting and taking a whiz.

October 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLady Kal

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