My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

A Team Effort

Ever wonder how a Cake Wrecks post gets written? Well, sometimes, it's like this:


Me: "I need a post idea. Any funny holidays coming up?"

John: [googling] "Hmm. Oh. Here we go: it's National Self-Help Group Awareness Month."

Me: "Isn't a 'self-help' group an oxymoron?"

John: [Already back to playing Tiny Wings on his phone] "Mmmmmhmmmm."

Me: "And what cakes would I use, anyway?"

::five minutes later::

Me: "Found one! Look:"

"See, the cupcakes on the right are all, 'Help me!!' and the left ones are like, 'DO EET YERSELF.' Eh?"

John: [glancing over] "You can't use those. They look like KKK cupcakes."

Me: "Ha! Yeah, but...they're chocolate. C'mon. That's kind of awesome."

John: "NOPE."

Me: "Fine. What else have you got?"

John: "Er..." [scrolling] " week is Meat Week."

Both together: "Naaah."

John: "Glaucoma Awareness Month?"

Me: "Oooh! I have the perfect cake for that!"

"No, wait, wait. HERE we go:"

Me: Bwahahaha!! Right? RIGHT?!"

John: [silence]

Me: "Or is that cataracts?"

John: "I don't understand. Do you ENJOY hate mail?"

Me: "Ok, Ok, never mind."

John: "Next you'll want to use Stocking Awareness Month. "

Me: "That's this month? Weird. You'd think it'd be last month."

John: "Why?"

Me: [busy clicking]

John: "You're not actually writing about Stocking Awareness Month, are you?"

Me: [still clicking] "Mmmhmm...."

John: "Jen..."

Me: "Hang on. Busy here."

John: "Jen..."

Me: "K, how 'bout this one?"

"Were you AWARE that this is, in fact, a stocking?"

John: [staring]

Me: "What? Not good enough?"

John: "It's 'stocking' with an 'AL.' You know, stalking?"

Me: [eyes wide] "Ooooooooooh."

John: "Yeah."

Me: "Well, I guess that makes more sense."

John: "Yeah."

Me: "But I think I have a cake for..."

John: "I'm going to stop you there. It's also National Handwriting Analysis Week. GO WITH THAT."

Me: "Ok, ok. FINE."


So without further ado, my dear Wreckies, here is today's post:


It's National Handwriting Analysis Week. I can tell you that the baker of today's cake was a focused individual with a flair for the dramatic, as well as someone who channels his or her emotions through humor. He or she may also have a less than helpful spouse who is MORE than welcome to write a post again himself sometime. JUST SAYIN'.


Thanks to Katrina V., Traci C., Selena E., Amanda R., & Brea S. for making today a day worth celebrating. And also thanks to John, my sweet hubby, for still laughing at all my jokes even while telling me I absolutely can NOT write that.

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Reader Comments (69)

That meat cake monstrosity made me gag. The slices on the dress are gray, and someone had to run his hands all over the meat to build the cake. *hack, erp*

The Self Help cupcakes had me laughing until John outed them as KKK. However, I will try to keep them in my mind's eye so as to erase the picture of the meat....*hurk, ack, brep..*

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterVon

That's it, now you've done it; "DO EET YOURSELF!" is my new mantra/motto!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStorm

Cataracts almost made me spit my breakfast out. Clever.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterspudd

Glad to hear those are cookies on the stocking cake. After the doll, I couldn't help seeing them as salami.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMorag

I've been putting on fake American accents, too, trying to make them sound different! Does "stocking" have an au dipthong and "stalking" have a long A? I'm going to have to break out the IPA, which I am not very skilled at using.

stuaking, stawlking, stuaking, stawlking . . .

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Hahaha WERE you AWARE that this was a STOCKING...meh...could've fooled me. I love your creative process! :D You should post the behind the scenes stuff more often...or do a LIVE cake wrecks video online for a special event! You know...where you and John and just clicking through photos on your labtop and talking about them in real-time...that would be the ULTIMATE behind the post ever?!?!? :D Pleasee?!??!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

I've never commented on a post before, but I just have to this time. This was the first thing I saw on the internet when I got out of surgery yesterday, and it made my day. Made me laugh so hard I even shared it with my nurse in recovery. Thanks so much for the laugh when I needed one the most!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterRachelB


January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMeg

@Jodee in WA and @Craig: We can relax, we do not have a mischief maker amongst us (well, just the one, anyway). Apparently, Theardare drew the moustaches himself; thinks it makes him look rather dashing. He asked the question as an experiment to see if we would turn on each other (like the Twilight Zone episode The Monsters Are Due On Maple Street).

@Haiku Joy: YES! So it is spoken, so it shall be.

@VoiceMail: Not at all. Now *I'm* sitting here putting on various accents to try and make 'stocking' and 'stalking' sound *different*. : D

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

Hold up... There are places that "stocking" and "stalking" are pronounced differently???

@Haiku Joy ~ If I had any artistic ability at all I would make you a bowl full of fondant babies. Sadly, I draw bad stick people o.O

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee in WA

You've got plenty of time. May is National Masturbation Month!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJen

You post today had me really laughing out loud. The banter between you and John was the absolute best!!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPaula

Meat cake with old lady doll! My birthdays were never that cool!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

Not sure what's funnier.......KKK cupcakes (the three on the left are vanilla, FYI), or Princess olive loaf!! If you get any complaints/hate mail, just post them. We can analyze the handwriting and then your fans will start stalking the complainers. They should be easy to find - they will be the ones leaving the blind/glaucoma self-help groups, for people without humor. ;) Thanks for the belly laugh.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

@Jodee, I may have to resort to a bowl of stick people for a while.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

@Haiku Joy ~ how about this one? <---- Look @Barbara Anne! I did it again! Go me!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee in WA

i think we need an addendum to Rule 34 (if it exists there is porn for it) that reads "If it exists there has been a horribly made cake for it".

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJill

:D yay, Jodee!!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

@Jodee, yes, like that, but maybe 15-40 of them in all the different colors humans come in and in a clear glass bowl. And not terrifically soon, I think. But one day.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

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