My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

How To Turn A Lazy Sunday Afternoon Into Monday's Post

It's Sunday right now where I am, which is to say in the past, since obviously you're reading this in the future, which is to say on Monday. Or maybe even later than Monday, since maybe you only check Cake Wrecks a few times a week, so it could be, like, WEDNESDAY or something right now.

Let me start again.

It's Sunday right now where I am, and John won't get off the Xbox so I can play Epic Mickey 2, so instead I'm sitting here tweeting about how I should be working. Then I realized: hey, if I'm writing, that IS working! Because that's how being a prefessional blogger works: 1) you write, 2) people read, 3) ??, 4) PROFIT.

Of course, at some point I'm going to have to throw in a picture of a funny cake, because I know how you people get if I yammer on too long without pictures of funny cakes. (PRO TIP: All readers enjoy being referred to as "you people.")

Let's see....Oh, ok, here's an idea: I'll just share whatever random thoughts come into my head, and then I'll illustrate them with cake. What could go wrong? {HILARIOUS FORESHADOWING}

Here goes.

I really like the colors cherry red and chocolate brown together. Or maybe I'm just in the mood for cherry chocolate cake. DISCUSS.

Ok, you can stop discussing it now. The mood has officially passed.


I have one of those page-a-day desk calendars on my desk, and it's a week out of date, because I keep forgetting to rip off a page-a-day. I bet this cake is exactly like that, only in reverse:

(Don't over think it. Trust me, I don't.)


While I was getting that cake I found this next one, and I have to say: I am convinced you guys do this to me on purpose, because you KNOW it makes me crazy dizzy:


So...dizzy...brain...cannot...compute.... Seriously, wreckporters, hat tip for getting the shot and all, but is it REALLY so hard to WALK AROUND THE TABLE and take the picture from there? Is it? I bet even Aggie #4 would know to do that!


And since I've started some kind of number theme here, check out what Meg W. found on a school website:

Ah, our future generations are in good hands. WHAT A RELIEF.


But enough about Meg and our future. Let's get back to me, and how John is still - STILL - on the Xbox.

I have a special place in my heart for bakers who make sculpted grooms' cakes of things they not only have never seen, but also don't even care enough about to find any kind of reference photo. "Oh, it's a box? Called the 'Xbox 360 Live'? And this is the game it plays? GOT IT."

(One might wonder why the controller almost looks like a controller, but that would mean one was over-thinking it. STOP THAT, ONE.)


Honestly, I'm not sure why I even WANT to play Epic Mickey 2 anymore. I mean, don't get me wrong; it has the advantage over the first game in that you can actually, you know, move. (TRUE FACT: Epic Mickey 1 didn't need enemies; you just fought the controls the whole time. [Oh snap!]) But the game is just not good. And yet I keep playing, because the concept is so cool that it has to GET good at some point, right? [INSERT OBSERVATION ON LIFE HERE]

(If you haven't heard of it, Epic Mickey uses a post-apocalyptic Disney World kind of setting, and all the characters are creepy and broken and deformed and man this is just too easy:

"Ooh HOO! Keep running around doing confusing, repetitive tasks in giant trash heaps while Cary Elwes narrates the massively overly-complicated plot lines, ok? Ha-yuck!"

Yep, it's just not good, I'm telling you. It's frustrating and uneven and bewildering and...what's that? John's taking a break for lunch? YAY I GET TO PLAY EPIC MICKEY 2 SOME MORE!!


Thanks to Megan W., Vivian G., Jamis, Meg W., Jill F., & Jenna S. for understanding that sometimes you just have to have a one-sided relationship with a video game.

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Reader Comments (59)

Sharyn and Haiku joy AHAHAHAHA XD XD XD

Jen you should be a stand up comic, you do not need pictures to be funny, although they help.

X box cake not too bad, but the rest of them D:

January 28, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Yikes!! So glad I did not make spaghetti lately lol. Oh how scary that first cake is. Honestly why do they even bother trying to make cakes look like food they end up looking like something the cat dragged in. Loved the XBOX one lol. No human could use that controller that's for sure.

January 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

#7 as Colleen wrote: ---My four year old came and looked over my shoulder as I scrolled past the last picture and asked "what is that?" I told him I didn't know and he responded with "It looks like a dog, maybe"--- combined with Craigs comment above makes me realise that my first impression was right -it's not Mickey, it's a characther from Dogbert and Dilbert -the boss! (Suppose they are called the same in US as in Sweden)

January 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterElisabet

1st..raising hand in recognition of the pausing for piano in Sharyn's song

2st I as well am a homeschooling mom...this is in fact how I found the worksheet me feel more confident knowing that I could see the errors while the Harvard sponsored site did not...

3st first cake had, "first poop after giving birth" dropped all over it...eeeeewww.... is now infact Wednesday while I type this...hahaha

January 30, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMeg

Love the "20013" cake…my dear old mother occasionally writes "20013" on cheques, bless her. She's also occasionally written something like 100.0.0 on the amount (probably still thinks we're using pounds, shillings and pence). However, as cheques are apparently being phased out in the UK within a few years, and given the poor old dear is 81, the cheques always go through :)

January 30, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterZaph Camden

My best friend and I are reading this when we realized that ITS ACTUALLY WEDNESDAY!!!!!!!!!

January 30, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLex and Cody

I was looking at the "epic mickey" cake when my 4 year old walked up and said, "look a puppy! Don't you see the puppy mom?" Yes son, yes I do.

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMissMaryB

You are hilarious - I love when you go on with words at least as much as looking at terrible cakes. I think your random thoughts illustrated by terrible cakes might be my favorite post on this whole blog.

April 5, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCC

I like the math cake with the "st" suffixes for all the numbers - so, there really is a "fist" grade, the point in school where you had your first fight - ?

November 19, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDoug

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