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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
May022014

Jen Finally Lets It Go

The sw*n glows "white" on the cakes here tonight


 

Not a footprint
to be seen.

 

A kingdom of wreck-er-ation
and it looks like I'm the "Qeen."

 

Conceal that meal

Don't let it show!

Whoops, now they knoooow...

 

LET IT

 

LET IT

Can't hold it in anymore!

 

LET IT

 

LET IT

Back away and SLAM the door!

*I*
*DON'T*
*CARE*

What they're GOING to say! 

 

Let the cakes wreck OOOOOONNNNNN!!

The wrecks never bothered me anyway.

 

Thanks to Sarah D., Lena C., Cori M., Mai Z., Jill D., Larissa S., Rachel M., Matt G., Sue S. & Miranda B. for the sweet release.

 

And now, your moment of Jen:

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

« May the Fourth Be With These Sweets | Main | Comic Issues »

Reader Comments (61)

That gave me the chills...

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Sung to: Do You Want to Build a Snowman

Do you want to wreck a sheet cake?
Yellow snow is not OK
Please don't walk on the cakes anymore
I think the you're
Pretty Qeen, is that OK?
My chicken meal looks muddy
And is that snot?
Pooh and frat guy are drained dry
Do you want to wreck a sheet cake?
Yes, "Pirate Hooker's" on a sheet cake
Don't ask why.


Aiiieeeeeeeee! (Thank you for the goats. My stomach hurts from laughing.)

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Best use of confetti sprinkle balls ever.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMirthMistress

I feel like there must be a story behind the one with the dead preppy next to a pink toilet full of sprinkles. It's just so... specific. Is it a movie I missed?

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBB, Miami

That video was brilliant.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJeanette

Goats are always appropriate.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

I... I... just.. those cakes...

Jen, that was fantastic!

And Sharyn? You got a gigglesnort :-D

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRachel CrazyMum

Pooh on poo, heartache on heartache . . .

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJasini

Let me be the first to say, "Don't eat yellow snow!" But I kind of liked Puking Ken. Not really badly done, and imaginative, at least!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

Thanks for the video, I nearly ruined my monitor, but it was a great way to start the day!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterpagopago

O, Cake Wrecks...my heart only bleats for you...I kid you not.....

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermel

I think the last three are my favorites. Doesn't the last one look like Marie Antoinette? And I would love to know the story behind the Pirate Hooker cake...

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermelanie sparkles

That last cake is a really good picture of Paula Deen.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKim L.

Yeah, fail on combining Captain Hook and Pirate Fairy... O.o

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterScaperMama

Being dyslexic, I can SO relate to the first one!
Brilliant mash of song and wrecks, Jen.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

Apparently Natalie is a big fan of Marie Antionette.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMatthew J

Lol@sharyn and mel. :D The cakes+jen= XD XD XD

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

I've got to admit. The 21st birthday cake with vomit sprinkles was pretty funny.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterPeachkins

Frozen has officially melted from popularity.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTheCreepyTribble

"LET IT *SCCHHHHHEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAARME*"

Thank you, my brain will now be Let-it-scream-ing all day.

Also, Elsa might need to get that checked.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered Commenter-Unknown-

I just have to say that I lurk here often and I can never leave until I've seen what Sharyn has written about today's posting. A serious talent there. Of course, I really think you hire all these witty people to post comments.;)

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterZaz

Alright, now that I'm mostly dead from the coughing fit from laughing...

We recently borrowed THAT MOVIE and the 14-year-old has been watching it on repeat...for the last 2 freaking weeks! She did the same thing when she was 2 with Finding Nemo. Isn't there a statute of limitations on that kind of thing? Mr. Potato, Head Counsel? Can you help me out here???

@Sharyn ~ At least this time it's 2 songs from the same movie stuck in my head...unlike last week when I had Let it Go and The Cup Song battling for supremacy!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

I thought Pooh was riding on an eagle with the head behind and then the wings, oh wait, the wings have eyes... And Pooh's saddle(?) has eyes, and there are random eyes all over the cake. I believe that's enough eyes on that cake and I'll just shut mine and scroll...
I <3 Cake Wrecks!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCBushLite

That did it. I have been following this blog for years. This finally made me comment. The video at the end is perfection!! I peed myself laughing. That is exactly what my poor two year old sounds like when he sings this song 40 times a day! That Pooh cake......... Lol. Definitely sharing to everyone this morning!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCharity

When I ordered a cake for my niece's baby shower, the decorator used that Pooh, too. But it was perched on a beautiful creation of colors and icing. Not. . . . slimy poo.

Yes, God Save the Qeen if she ever sees this cake. She'll flip her crown.

And the goats were a scream! Thanks for the laugh on a very tired Friday.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

This may have been your best post ever. I'm still giggling.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCarmen

Any southern girl has heard her mama say, "Well, I'll swan." (Well, I'll swear) So, let it swan!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLorie

Melaniesparkles and ScaperMama, the story behind the Pirate Hooker cake is from a blog called Rants from Mommyland. It's gone pretty defunct now, but for awhile it was updated almost every day and was hilarious! Pirate Hooker was a term of endearment used between the 2 moms who wrote the blog, and then got expanded to be folks who got involved to help other readers, they would ask people who needed help to contact them, and then hook them up with folks who were willing to send a gift card to help out, thus, the hookers...

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNotThatJen

None of these cakes are the G.O.A.T. although I do like the sprink-puke-les.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterThe Former CB

That video! Can't stop laughing. It reminded me of a sheep yearbook my friend gave me for Christmas once. Some guy took pictures of a bunch of sheep posed in various high-school locations (and when appropriate, corresponding clothing) and made a full 20-something page yearbook full of captions, clubs, sports teams, etc. I need to go find the box that is buried in now . . .

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

That "Happy 21" cake isn't a wreck, IT'S PERFECT!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterErica

I don't care what they're going to bray

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

Great Daily Show reference. OMG the goats...the goats...OH. MY. GOSH. THE. GOATS. WERE...is it disturbing that I want to say AWESOME? Still laughing. This post is going to stay with me a while...

Luckily, I have been a Wrekkie long enough to know to NOT take a sip of my beverage right before I check out the wrecks of the day, ergo, no electronics were harmed in the watching of this post...in my house anyway.

Keep calm and goat-scream on. Have a great weekend CW crew and fans too!!!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterVaBeach alemaP

Quite the pile of Pooh.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

I'm with 1 or 2 others...I'm actually quite fond of Ken...can we call him "Let It Go - Ken...now with rainbow up-chuck!"

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDebs

Poor Pooh. I'm just wondering if that's a birthday cake or a glad you survived cake. The sprinkles and pink toilet are really nice touches.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara

I'm so very glad for CW today. This morning there was a shooting scare at one of the schools in the district my youngest is in. All schools in the district were on lockdown. Apparently I have one of the only students in the entire district with a phone that listened to the teachers when they were told not to use their phones to tell their parents that they are ok! Good news, she's fine. Better news? Watching that video makes me laugh and not think about the scary stuff.

Thanks Jen, john(ThoJ) and all my commenting buddies for making the scary stuff go away for a little bit.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

I. Am. Digging.

THE SHEEP!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLaura R

@Jodee: Thank you for your inquiry. I solicited (after all, that’s what a solicitor does) two of my junior partners to look into this matter with me – so you might say I was assisted by a pair a legals. There is not much in the books about this; sadly, not even enough to make a full case of cases, so, so much for case law here. We did discover that the statute of limitations dates back to early Roman times, when you had to act quickly because people were roamin’ all over the land and therefore hard to find. Also, my associates, Mr. Ipso and Mr. Facto, did uncover a statute about the limitation of statues. Interesting enough, in the early days of the city of Walla Walla Walla Walla, Washington (which, unfortunately, lost two of its Wallas due to structural defects – and, ironically, this event was immortalized in the song “Pompeii,” by the British band Bastille) there was a law that no statue could be higher than the Mayor. This led to statues throughout the city constantly being lowered into holes or raised on pedestals, depending upon the height of the current Mayor.

But to get to your concern, your 14 year old is what is known as a “Tween.” This is because for all adolescents everything is a matter of being ‘tween life and death. With hormones running rampant, everything is a dire emergency, a cause for fatalism, or the best thing that ever happened. And, the same event can be any one of these things, depending upon which way the wind is blowing (they call the wind Mariah). In legal terms, constant, repetitive watching of the same video falls into the category of “misdemeanor.” This means that once the viewing cycle begins, if you try to stop it before it runs its course, well, the more they miss, da meaner they get. Consequently, since each person has their own viewing tolerance, each viewing cycle is different, and there is no legal UPTT, or Uniform Parental Tolerance Time. While this may offer no comfort to you in this matter at this time, based upon the information you have provided, it appears that once this cycle is over, the next one won’t begin until said child is twenty-six. It appears that your only solace currently is to silently echo every parent’s mantra in these situations: I hope you have a kid just like you someday.

Thank you for thinking of Tinker, Toys and Tops.

@mindy1: thanks for the :D

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermel

@mel ~ I have no clue how you do it but I am in awe. After my day with said 14-year-old, I guess a few more times watching THAT MOVIE will be ok. Thanks for the giggles!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

@Jodee: so glad that all is well with you and yours!

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermel

Jodie: what an awful situation, so glad to hear all is well.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRachel CrazyMum

I so thoroughly treasure my ignorance of the song this post parodies.

May 2, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterkhereva

That Happy 21 (at least I think it's 21) is kind of ingenious if you're okay with puke on your cake.

May 3, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBea

@Jodee: you are so welcome! :-)

May 3, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermel

Lol yay @ Mr. Potato, head council. Oh the laughter those give me especially when the neighbors are driving me to distraction. I wish there were a legal precedence to send him a cake wreck lol.

May 3, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Frozen references=always welcome. :D

May 3, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterEmma

@khereva: Actually, it IS a fairly decent song. There is a reason, after all, that it won an Oscar and the singer, Idina Menzel, is possessed of an incredible set of pipes. (Just listen to her belt out "Defying Gravity" on the Wicked songtrack.) It is worthy of a listen or two, no doubt about that.

But the problem starts when one is around small and/or demanding children who want to hear their currently favorite song over and over and over and OVER...often in that order. Even the most enchanting voice becomes your hated enemy then, and the phenonenom that is "Frozen" all too often produces this.

But, really, do listen to Idina Menzel. Her voice is astounding.

May 3, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

@Arlene: Thank you. Concerning your neighbor, you could try the "kill 'em with kindness" approach. Avoid a tort by sending a nice torte.

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