John Will Never Let Me Post This, But It Made Me Laugh

I'm not going to blur the label on this wreck, minions, because sometimes something is so heinous, so beyond the pale, that I think the world deserves an answer from the responsible party.

Yep, I'm looking at you, Target.

Right.

A few things:

What... what in sweet Stay Puft's marshmallow-covered heck is this?

A "cookie mountain"? A "COOKIE MOUNTAIN"??

Target, let's chat.

In what frosted-over nether world of despair and insulin resistance did you imagine chocolate chip cookies needed to be submerged in a pound of vanilla icing? How do you even eat such a thing? Who is it for? When's the right time to pull this out at parties?

And most importantly - most importantly - what the heck is going ON in your bakery pitch meetings?

"Ok, ok, hear me out, team: cookies... and icing."

"What, like frosted sugar cookies?"

"No, more icing."

"Like cookie sandwiches?"

"No, more icing."

"Like a cookie cake?"

"I'M SAYING LET'S TAKE A WHOLE TUB OF ICING AND STICK SOME COOKIES IN IT, OK, BARB?"

[stunned silence]

[Barb begins to slow clap]

[The rest of the room joins her]

[tumultuous applause, raucous cat-calls, confetti cannons, etc]

"And we shall call it... a COOKIE MOUNTAIN! MWAHAHAAAAAA!"

[Entire room conga-lines out, leaving poor Stanley the janitor to clean up all the cocaine and empty booze bottles, because they're jerks like that.]

THE END.

Sorry, minions, guess I got a little carried away there. These cookie mountains pack a punch, lemme tell ya.

Thanks to Sarah S. for taking us on this magical journey through the Target "bakery."

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot: